Blog Archives

I’ve Found the Bob Ross of Cooking Instructional Videos

I’m not even sure what I just watched. His voice and accent was so soothing that I fell asleep at my computer. Now that I have discovered Bruno’s channel I don’t think I will be watching much else from now on. I’m pretty sure that if I watched this bread video and any episode of the Bob Ross show I would slip into a coma never to be heard from again. And i’m ok with that.

-Matt

Florida News Anchor John Brown Is Fed Up With The Kardashians

I don’t know if this is the sign of the apocalypse or not, but a resident of Florida actually had a realistic reaction to a real life situation. John Brown isn’t the anchor we deserve, but he is the anchor we need. If more news anchors around the country would just walk out every time a Kardashian was featured on a news story, we’d have a much better society. If you want to play an ad for their TV show talk about Kim and Kanye’s baby that’s one thing, but is Kylie Jenner naming her pet rabbit ‘Bruce’ really a news story? The answer is no, it is not. I can’t imagine there are more than three people interested in that story. But here’s a TV show giving it it’s own segment, because one of the people involved just so happen to have the last name Kardashian or Jenner. Insanity.

-Ryan

Throwback Jimmy Fallon Video – ‘Whip My Hair’ Featuring Bruce Springsteen

Jimmy Fallon has so many good videos from his time on Late Night and the Tonight Show that I thought it’d be appropriate to start sharing some of the older ones. I’ve watched about one thousand musical sketches featuring Jimmy Fallon impersonating a legendary singer and he still blows my mind every time. Also, The Boss.

– Ryan

So Bruce Jenner is Actually Turning Into a Woman

Surgery: A source claimed to The National Enquirer at the time that the 64-year-old former Olympian had undergone surgery to reduce the appearance of his Adam's Apple

A picture is worth a thousand words. And apparently Kris Jenner is so awful to be with that she makes you want to be a woman. An elegant, jump suit wearing woman.

– Ryan

Bruce Jenner’s Transformation Into a Woman is Almost Complete

Source – Bruce Jenner is allegedly planning on flattening his Adam’s Apple.

The 64-year-old reportedly met with a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon on Thursday for a consultation regarding the procedure, known as chondrolaryngoplasty (or tracheal shave), reports TMZ.

The operation reduces the size of the cartilage in the neck, and is typically performed on patients in the initial stages of gender reassignment surgery.

6th Annual George Lopez Celebrity Golf Classic

Bruce Jenner is either drawing out his sex change operation or he wants his body to be 100% plastic. Normally you can pin point exactly what a person is trying to do, but not with Bruce. He is a true wildcard. The worst thing is we have no blueprint for a person like Bruce. I can’t remember anyone in the history of the world who started his life as a male Olympic athlete and slowly turned into a lesbian. I wasn’t even aware that was possible. Somehow he’s pulling it off. On a side note, getting your Adam’s apple trimmed down sounds like the most painful thing in the world. Just tell the world your plans, Bruce. And stop wearing visors if you don’t want to be called a lesbian.

– Ryan

Monsterblog Wednesday – If You Had to Watch One Movie For the Rest of Your Life…

A Bronx Tale

While I always go with Clooney in pretty much any hypothetical situation, I had to switch things up for this monster blog. Before Tony Soprano landed on our TV sets, there was Sonny. Sonny was a mobster, and Sonny was cool. A Bronx Tale, for those who haven’t seen it, follows C, a young Bronx boy who has to decide between a life of crime with mobster Sonny or follow in his father’s footsteps and make an honest living. The icing on the cake? Bobby De Niro stars as C’s father, and he directs the movie. Watch this movie and tell me it doesn’t have the greatest soundtrack of all-time. I DARE YOU. Also, it provides us with one of the greatest quotes in movie history: “the saddest thing in life is wasted talent”.

– Ryan

Armageddon

large_armageddon_blu-ray12

NO question in my mind. This was probably the easiest choice I have ever made. Affleck, Willis, Tyler, Wilson, Duncan (RIP), Thornton, Buscemi, fitchner…and the list goes on! Star studded cast? Check! Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck saving mankind? Check! Romantic love story? Check! Uber emotional ending that I don’t cry at every time? Check! On my death bed i’m going to rip my hospital tag off my wrist and scream “GIVE THIS TO TRUMAN! MAKE SURE TRUMAN GETS THAT!”

-MattyV

What movie would you watch? Comment below!

Linda Ducharme Married a Ferris Wheel. Guess What State She’s From?

Honestly Florida, I give up. You win the make believe award for craziest state. It’s not odd enough that Linda Ducharme is marrying a ferris wheel. Nope. She’s actually been in a relationship with Bruce for 30 years. Oh did I forget to mention the ferris wheel has a name? It’s Bruce, which would be hysterical if this story wasn’t so weird. I do have to give the priest credit for his professionalism in this video. He’s a bigger man than I for not completely falling apart laughing during the ceremony. And Linda, although you’re clearly insane…

– Ryan

If You Hang Out With Bruce Dusting, You Better Be Ready to Marry Him

(Source) “A woman who turned down a marriage proposal  from a well-to-do suitor was shocked when he handed a bill of more than £115,000  for everything he claims to have spent on her.

Single mother Marie Lacombe, 42, from  Melbourne, Australia, says she and 65-year-old Bruce Dusting were never  romantically involved.

But it seems he felt differently about their relationship, claiming she led him on to extract money from him to fund Zumba classes, shopping trips and even cosmetic surgery.

Ms.Lacombe met Mr. Dusting four years ago when  she began teaching him dance. The pair became good friends, with Mr. Dusting  taking her for dinner and visiting her home regularly.

But things between them turned sour when he  asked for her hand in marriage – and she turned him down.

Now he has handed her an itemized bill  outlining every single penny he ever gave her or spent on her behalf, which  amounts to a hefty AU$200,000 (£116,638).”

Bruce Dusting

Poor Bruce. He gives this lady $155,000 of his own money for Zumba and clothes and surgery, and she can’t even give him the common courtesy of her hand in marriage? Appalling. Now he’s sulking on his couch, alone and confused. What did Marie really expect in this situation. A rich old man is giving you endless amounts of money, taking you out to dinner and basically letting you live your dream life. You didn’t think he was going to come back and want something in return. Granted marriage is kind of an odd request, but Bruce Hastings is a man who zeroes in on something and gets it. Except in this case, because now he’s just a sad old man.

– Ryan

P.S. Marie is the worst looking 42 year old on planet Earth.

Marie Lacombe