GOT – Since “The Red Wedding” episode of Game of Thrones aired in June 2013, actor David Bradley has either been invited to ALL the weddings, or no weddings. On one hand, who wouldn’t want to take a picture with Walder Frey, like a Redditor recently did? On the other, well, at least your entire family is there. Makes the funeral much easier to plan.
There’s a few things I know to be true: George Clooney is a beautiful prince, Bill Paxton discovered the Titanic and if you go to a wedding that Walder Frey is at you’re going to die. I don’t care if it was my own wedding, if I saw that guy I’m running for the hills. If they find this guy with a knife in his back in some dumpster, you know who to question first.
Jim Ross’s commentary paired with non wrestling things continues to be the greatest videos on the internet, especially when the non wrestling things are something as awesome as Game of Thrones. “The caskets on fire! The caskets on fire!”.
The TV God’s giveth and the TV God’s taketh away. The almost three month stretch of amazing, incredible [insert any other adjective here] television is slowly coming to an end now that the summer is pretty much officially here. On Sunday, Game of Thrones had their season four finale, wrapping up easily the best season of the series. Last night, Louie finished up it’s newest season on FX, and if last year was any indication, we probably won’t see him again until 2025. Tonight is the season one finale of my favorite new show, Fargo. That these three awesome television shows all end within three days is a cruel, cruel punishment. I’m spending the rest of the summer in my dark place until television rights and wrong and brings more fantastic TV in the fall.
Game of Thrones wasn’t new this week (damn you HBO) so we’ll have to settle for Seth Rogen and Snoop Dogg intellectually dissecting the plot of everybody’s favorite medieval drama. I think I just reached my big word quota for the week.
P.S. I love how Snoop Dogg calls Tyrion “Peter”. There’s a 100% chance he doesn’t know any of the characters names.
I now believe global warming alarmists are unpatriotic racists knowingly misleading for their own ends. Good night.
— Pat Sajak (@patsajak) May 20, 2014
Hey global warming deniers, how good does it feel to have PAT SAJACK on your side? I guess I can understand the unpatriotic part, but the racist part is baffling. Do you think Pat Sajack knows what global warming is? Does he think it’s some kind of propaganda scientists created to destroy minorities? I really have no problem with this tweet. I think it’s hilarious, and there are plenty of people who deny global warming and climate change and that’s their prerogative. What I don’t like is when someone comes out against climate change, get’s called out, then backs off.
Sometimes it’s fun to poke a stick in a hornets’ nest just to hear the buzzing.
— Pat Sajak (@patsajak) May 20, 2014
Do you want to know why most uninformed people tend to support people who claim climate change is real? It’s because when they are called out for their views, they back it up with FACTS. When global warming/climate change deniers are called out for their views, they claim it’s all in good fun. Have some balls, Pat. I’ll be watching the Wheel of Fortune on mute from now. That’ll show you.
For those of you who don’t know what “flair bartending” is… The Average Nobodies very rarely turn down a chance to drink during the week, so we attended the Flair Bartending Flip Out On Cancer charity event Monday in Providence, Rhode Island. The logic is simple: you pick a song or two and you bartend your ass off. While we were watching the competition, we thought we’d throw our hats in the ring and pick a few songs and create a routine in case there ever comes a day where we need to flair bartend to save our families from a Russian super villain bent on world domination.
Flair bartending is all about energy, and with these two songs I’ll have it in spades. Return of the Mack will get the people on their feet and Dance With Somebody will literally have people dancing with each other. If you can’t jam to these two songs, you have no soul and I don’t want you apart of my flair bartending routine. Another good thing about these songs is that they will distract the audience away from my routine. A lot of the bartenders we saw were all hands and arms, so I’m thinking I use a feet heavy routine. Do people want their bartenders feet near their drinks? Probably not, but I’m the flair bartender and they’re not. At some point I’ll probably roll multiple bottles on the ground and kick them like a soccer ball. Add in a couple hip thrusts and some obscene gestures, and you have yourself one hell of a flair bartending routine.
From what I saw at the flair bartending event your music can make or break your performance in two ways: 1. The music doesn’t speak to your inner showman or show-woman and you come up short. Using the music to get the juices flowing is like a natural adrenaline shot to the heart. You ever hear about mothers that gain ridiculous strength to save their children? Well i’m pretty sure I could jump over a small building while listening to 80’s hair metal. and 2. The music doesn’t get the people going. Nothing’s worse than getting ready to perform something in from of some people and the crowd isn’t cheering your every move. Look back at some Stone Cold Steve Austin entrances. When that glass breaks there isn’t one ass in one seat in the whole arena! Handicapped sections included (if that’s terrible of me I am sorry, but I need to prove a point). That’s the kind of energy a flair bartending performance deserves!
Having said that, my choices were easy. I start off with some ‘Twisted Sister’ followed up by the ultimate party song, Cherry Pie. I figure I will use a lot of ice in my routine. Like throw it around and keep the eyes off the action at hand. That way I can lean on some simple bottle flips and cup twirls throughout my performance. Smoke and mirrors people, that’s the first rule of magic school. I also will be yelling pretty loud so that should create an additional distraction. Like so loud that people will think i’m hurt, but I won’t be..I think.
Side note: Veteran flair performer, Lauren, said that Cherry Pie is too slow of a song to flair to. I didn’t listen, so I could be off to an awful start to my flair career. I regret nothing.
If this is WWE’s way of making up for his siren entrance theme then I accept. I might just order seven of these so I can wear it every day without compromising my overall hygiene. The King of Swing is here to stay.