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Trailer(?) Alert – Pacific Rim 2: Uprising

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This isn’t a trailer in the typical sense–it actually plays more like a recruitment video. If you remember back to the media spots for Pacific Rim, they did a lot of promotion like this. Instead of releasing dedicated movie trailers, they released immersive content to hype the story.

So, what does it tell us? For one, John Boyega’s accent is a mirror reflection of his film dad’s (Idris Elba). Secondly, we have a gaggle a new jaegers to admire throughout the tease and specifically in that last shot. I’m assuming this isn’t the only little promo they have ready to let loose. Look for some kind of Kaiju smear campaign to follow soon.

How excited am I for this movie? Ask K-Ci & JoJo

-Matt

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Game of Thrones Creators Announced Their New Show ‘Confederate’ & It’s Getting Exactly The Reaction You’d Expect

The creators of HBO’s hit medieval fantasy “Game of Thrones” have their next show lined for the premium cable network, but this one has no dragons or an undead army of white walkers. David Benioff and Dan Weiss, who adapted “Game of Thrones” from George R.R. Martin’s “A Song of Ice and Fire” books, will write and direct an original series called “Confederate,” HBO said on Wednesday.

The show is set in an alternative reality in a nation where slavery is still legal and southern U.S. states have seceded. HBO said the series “chronicles the events leading to the Third American Civil War.”

It will explore perspectives including freedom fighters, slave hunters, politicians, journalists and abolitionists on both sides of the divide, HBO said in a statement. “Confederate” is a world away from the dragons, undead armies and magic in the medieval setting of “Game of Thrones,” where warring factions scheme and battle for control over the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros. – NBC News

HBO’s response to the social media backlash

People are UPSET about this news from Benioff, Weiss & HBO, and it’s the least surprising thing in the world. Last time I checked the creators behind TV and movies were allowed to make controversial content, and while it’s terrible to picture an alternate reality where the South won the Civil War & slavery was still legal, it shouldn’t be lost that this is a TV show idea. It’s just as much a fantasy as Game of Thrones is. I’d also like to see how all these people who are up in arms reacted to the release of The Man in the High Castle. Last time I  checked season 3 was premiering later this year, and Germany winning World War II and taking over the world isn’t exactly the most lighthearted subject matter.

The biggest problem I have with the constant backlash on social media is that once they win i.e. if Confederate gets canned, the backlash will never stop. People will always find something to get upset about until we won’t be allowed to say, do and most importantly create anything. Is our nation’s history fucked up? Yup, but that shouldn’t stop people from examining it and creating new things. I hope Confederate gets made, because I will watch the hell out of it.

-Ryan

The Doctah Diaries: R. Kelly Is Apparently Holding Aspiring Female Musicians Hostage

Before we begin, let’s all hope Dave Chappelle is hard at work on a new R. Kelly scandal song. I’m thinking ‘I’ll Never Let You Fly (The Hostage Song)’ to the beat of ‘ I Believe I Can Fly.

And now, back to the drama.

It has been a longggggggggggggg while since we heard from R&B singer, R. Kelly, and I think I know why.

Kelly has been pleasantly, or unpleasantly, keeping women in a cult.

Couple of things on my mind here before we continue about Mr Kelly

  1. I didn’t know that cults provided food, shelter, and clothing. I thought they only provided Kool-Aid
  2. What’s stopping women from leaving Mr. Kelly if they live in Chicago and Atlanta?  It’s not like they are next door neighbors

But, that’s neither here nor there …

Here’s an excerpt from the article:

Three former members of Kelly’s inner circle—Cheryl Mack, Kitti Jones, and Asante McGee— provided details supporting the parents’ worst fears. They said six women live in properties rented by Kelly in Chicago and the Atlanta suburbs, and he controls every aspect of their lives: dictating what they eat, how they dress, when they bathe, when they sleep, and how they engage in sexual encounters that he records. – Vice

First of all, keywords here are RENT, PARENTS, SEXUAL.  I’ll explain why.

  1. Kelly is renting.  I guess “I Believe I Can Fly” didn’t make enough royalties to buy a home?  Can’t you leave rent agreements freely by calling the police?  What ever happened to that idea?  “Hi Officer, I’m being detained against my will because I won’t pay the rent, will you come arrest somebody.”  Try that.
  2. Parents normally fear for their children’s lives.  Understandable.  However, they don’t go to the press – they go to the cops.  This is why I believe this is just terrible PR management and R. Kelly is just trying to make a comeback, and his publicist was just like “hey Rob, let’s run with the sex thing, tell your [expletives] they each get 50k.”.
  3. Let’s see.  How about if he’s really being a dick, you can technically bite his tallywacker right off and claim temporary insanity, domestic abuse, and self defense all in one defense and BAM you’ll be that girl, but you’ll be … how do you say it … FREE

The truth is, this R. Kelly mess is just a big made up scam by his publicist in a desperate attempt to free R. Kelly’s soul.

On the other hand, let’s talk about the happy days when you didn’t know R. Kelly liked to perform golden showers and make females hang out with him against their will. Remember little Michael Jordan’s dad saying “And when you’re all done with that … I suppose … youre gonna fly, huh?” and Jordan dunking the ball? Oh the times, they have changed. But now you know where all that Space Jam money went, and obviously it’s not enough for Mr. Kelly because he can’t purchase a damn mansion and store his collective females there.

Oh, Lord, this has been one hell of a day.  I need a ZIMA.  Google it.

Stay Classy my Nobodies.  Until we meet again.

~The Doctah~

040 Game of Thrones S7 E1 – Dragon Stone

Talk to us on twitter – @AverageNobodies || Read our blog – www.averagenobodies.com || Leave us a voicemail – 401-285-8120

Shane McMahon Has Inherited His Father’s Immortality Gene & Survived A Helicopter Crash This Morning

Shane McMahon was involved in a helicopter crash this morning in Long Island. The small helicopter, transporting McMahon and one other person was forced to make a water landing in the waters off Gilgo Beach earlier today. Shane and the other person on board were picked up by the Coast Guard and ferried to safety.

Both people were wearing their life jackets and no one was hurt. Shane was the passenger on the flight. – Top Rope Press

The McMahon family rarely does anything by the book, and while it was always assumed that Vince McMahon had some secret pact with the devil to be immortal, it looks like Shane is carrying on that family legacy as well. We’re glad Shane’s ok, but I can’t imagine a crash landing into the water is any more painful than jumping off Hell in a Cell through a table.

When he says the man upstairs, he means Shawn Michaels’ tag team partner, right?

-Ryan

Trailer Alert – The Snowman

I’m a sucker for Fassbender. That being said, when I found out he was starring in The Snowman a year or so back, I went to Barnes & Noble and picked up the novel first. I liked the book so much, I’ve since read 3 others’ in author Jo Nesbo’s Harry Hole crime novels. I have been drooling for this trailer for months now and let me tell you, it does not disappoint. The music for the trailer is perfect, the filming locations look beautiful and absolutely nothing is given away. In the simple words of Magneto, “perfection.” The cast includes Michael Fassbender as Detective Harry Hole, Rebecca Ferguson and JK Simmons to name a few. Combined with Director Tomas Alfredson known state side for his work on Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, we’re in for an edge of your seat serial murder mystery thriller. I’d like to say I won’t watch another trailer for this flick because I’m beyond hyped for it and this was all I needed to see, but then again, I can’t control myself. If anyone needs me, I’ll be watching this trailer on repeat for the rest of the day.

-Adam

Olivia Culpo Celebrated 2 Million Instagram Followers & Oh No Everything Is Ruined

For those of you who don’t know, Olivia Culpo is Rhode Island native (hey now!), current model, actress, restaurateur and former 2012 miss USA winner. She’s also currently dating New England Patriot Danny Amendola, because beautiful people need to stick together. Olivia recently reached 2 million followers, and celebrated how anyone would: with a lot of balloons.

Isn’t that lovely. Kind of sucks for her team because blowing up 10,000,000 balloons sounds awful. Beyond awful. While most of her fans were also in the celebratory mood, one creature from the depths of Instagram hell emerged to spoil the party:

I didn’t just include @me81093418470’s comment in that picture, but if you can’t distinguish the insane from the not insane we have bigger problems here. I’m always tempted to dissect these comments, but I know that’s a losing battle. I really can’t figure this one out though. “Look at me while you take your bra off” is insane on it’s own, but when you add all those extra exclamation points it enters into the danger zone. It’s so oddly specific too. The eye contact request is what really worries me, although if I’m being honest, this person existing on planet Earth is the most worrying thing of all.

Hey Olivia, if you’re reading, I apologize on behalf of the human race.

-Ryan

Trailer Alert: A Wrinkle In Time

There are many things that I’m a sucker for when it comes to movie trailers, and A Wrinkle In Time hit the big ones. Chris Pine? Check. A sweet cover song? Show me a more sinister cover of Sweet Dreams than the one in the trailer and I’ll show you a liar. Visual effects that suck you in? Triple check. Plus, anytime you can develop a popular science fiction novel with a 9 figure movie budget, it’s always going to look wonderful. Now, will the story will be as wonderful as the visual aspects? We’ll have to wait and see, but the cast is stacked (the aforementioned Pine, Mindy Kaling, Reese Witherspoon, Zach Galifianakis, Michael Pena & Oprah no known last name). I think the key for this movie, and most science fictions adaptations, is to stay as far away from the reviews as possible. You’re going to have to expand your mind to begin with, so basing your opinion off of someone else’s reaction would be a big mistake. A Wrinkle In Time opens March 9th, 2018.

-Ryan

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