Jimmy Fallon has so many good videos from his time on Late Night and the Tonight Show that I thought it’d be appropriate to start sharing some of the older ones. I’ve watched about one thousand musical sketches featuring Jimmy Fallon impersonating a legendary singer and he still blows my mind every time. Also, The Boss.
If this is going to be the after effects of Movember then I vote we shut it down right now. Growing mustaches is one thing. Turning that mustache into a weird mustache chest hair cat sculpture is another. I think this sassy lady speaks for all of us when she says…
There’s a recurring theme in the three pictures above: Jennifer Lawrence’s insane hotness. Short hair, long hair, straight hair, blonde hair, brown hair; unless she gets a face transplant she’s still going to be one of the hottest woman on the planet. Since we’re close to the same age and we’re pretty even in the popularity category, I’ve assumed the responsibility of protecting her from the wrath of media. Still waiting on a dinner date as a thank you.
The oatmeal created an awesome (and accurate) breaking bad chart that analyzes each character’s tendency for violence vs. how much hair they have. Since George Zimmerman can’t see to keep his fat head out of trouble, I decided to do a little analyzing of my own.
Here’s George Zimmerman in 2005 after a domestic violence incident. Still not a choir boy, but the case was eventually thrown out. Also, notice Zimmerman has a full head of hair and he’s fat.
Here’s George Zimmerman towards the end of the Trayvon Martin trial, and only a few months before his most recent domestic violence incident. He isn’t pure evil by any means, and he’s grown out his hair and somehow gotten fatter.
Fresh off a murder George Zimmerman. That’s right, no hair, semi-skinny, and now he’s a murderer. Shot an unarmed kid. When George Zimmerman is fat with a full head of hair, he get’s into minor domestic disturbances. When George Zimmerman gets a buzz cut and loses weight, he turns into a murderer.
Moral of the story: whether you’re cooking meth to feed your family during a cancer battle or a member of the neighborhood watch, if you’re skinny with a shaved head and a goatee you’re a cold blooded murderer.