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In What Might Be The Smartest Marketing Campaign Of All Time, Budweiser Is Re-Branding It’s Beer ‘America’ This Summer

INBudweiser is renaming its beer “America” for the summer. The special cans and bottles will be available May 23 through the presidential election in November, owner Anheuser-Busch said Monday.

The Atlantic notes that’s just in time for peak beer season: “Summer is the best-selling season for beer — about one-third of all U.S. sales are between Memorial Day and Labor Day.”

The cans, in addition to the usual patriotic flare, will have phrases from the Pledge of Allegiance and lyrics from “The Star-Spangled Banner” and “America the Beautiful,” the company said.

If anything ever deserved the Citizen Kane slow clap, it’s this decision by Budweiser. What a beautiful, brilliant move. I can honestly say that I’ve never been swayed one way or the other by advertising campaigns except when it comes to beer. My usual plan is ‘buy whatever is cheapest’ and while that has turned out to be a horrifically flawed plan, I’m sticking to it. But when it comes to beer, advertising and bottle/can design means a lot to me. Budweiser’s American flag cans usually get the job done, and that’s why I’ll drink them all summer. Now that they’re upping their game and actually adding the word ‘America’ to their cans, it’s a no brainer. People who say Budweiser and Bud Light taste like piss and aren’t real beers can enjoy their $9 10% craft brews and wake up with a headache that would kill an elephant the next morning. I’ll enjoy my 15 Budweiser’s and wake up ready to fly a plane. My only other desire is for them to do the same with Budweiser tap handles. I want to be able to order a nice cold draft of America whenever I go out to eat. Let me have that this summer, Mr. Budweiser.


017 Processed Meats and Walking Dead Treats [Spoilers]

The Average Nobodies talk about the World Health Organization’s new carcinogen designation, the newest Walking Dead episode and a Sonic opens in our home town.

Badass of the Week – Neil Armstrong

Brand new to is “Badass of the Week”. It’s simple, every week we pick someone (past or present) and give them the prestigious honor of gracing our webpages as Badass of the Week. Look for it every Thursday.

Neil Armstrong

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American Pride Flows Through Dough and Cheese


“Proud to be an American” pizza boxes are as American as you can get. Love the statement these boxes make. “Do you love your country? Yo do? Well, here’s a pizza, my friend.”

God Bless America! Cue the music!




Monster Blog Wednesday – National Anthems

Since Veterans Day just passed, and national anthems are one of the coolest parts of a live game experience, we decided to pick our favorite national anthem rendition at a music or sporting event. The competition is fierce, because many all time greats have sung a live version of the national anthem. Here are our picks..

Nobody, and I mean nobody, has ever looked cooler singing the national anthem than Marvin Gaye. Single handedly made me change my stance on wearing sunglasses indoors. I’ve always hated people who do it, but after watching this, I’m not sure I’ll ever take them off indoors. Marvin had every girl in that place swoonin’ while singing the national anthem. How many artists can say that? Just blowing the roof of the Staples Center. If I made the all star team that year I would’ve made the commissioner cancel the game. No way you follow that performance. Impossible.

– Ryan

It’s Woodstock 1969, and the greatest human to ever pick up a guitar, Jimi Hendrix, is tearing down the house playing the good ol’ Star Spangled Banner. I have always said if I was ever able to go back in time I would like to be at Woodstock, and more specifically during one of Jimi’s sets. The guy was an absolute magician with the strings, not to mention he lights his instrument on fire from time-to-time.


Northwestern is Dominating the College Football Jersey Scene


I’ve never needed something more in my life. These jerseys are everything we love about America: football, flags and excess.

– Ryan

Did the Red Sox Win The World Series Last Night? And Were The Average Nobodies There To Witness History?








Yes they did. Yes we were.

What a season. From 69-93 to 108-70, and champions of the baseball world. I wrote last week about the power of sports to heal people, and cities, in a time of need. The 2013 Boston Red Sox went beyond that. They put their hands on our collective shoulders and assured us, just like in that famous Bob Marley song that accompanies every Victorino plate appearance, that everything was going to be alright. No stat chatter needed today. Simply stated, I’ve never had more fun watching a team, and I’ll never forget the feeling of pure joy I felt when Koji fittingly got that final strikeout. I’ve never high fived so many strangers, and it’s never felt so right. Now, there’s only one thing left do. Freddie, take it away..

– The Average Nobodies

If Anyone Can Change the Laws of the Constitution, it’s Arnold Schwarzenegger

(Source) “Action star and former California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has been lobbying for support to change the law to allow him to run for president in 2016, according to the New York Post’s Page Six.

We’re told Ahnold has been openly talking about his political ambitions while in New York to promote his new movie with Sylvester Stallone, “Escape Plan.”

One source said: “Schwarzenegger has been talking openly about working on getting the constitutional rules changed so he can run for president in 2016. He is ready to file legal paperwork to challenge the rules.”

Arnie was born in Austria, and the US Constitution prevents foreign-born citizens from holding the nation’s top job. Any amendment to the Constitution must be approved by two-thirds majority in the House and the Senate.”


If there’s one person in this world that can change constitutional law and become the first foreign president, it’s Arnold. Mr. Olympia, marries a Kennedy, enormous movie star, governor of California. Pretty impressive resume. If we’re all being honest with ourselves, the government we have in place right now isn’t doing so hot. Maybe Arnold is the change we need. North Korea has nuclear weapons? Agree to meet with Kim Jong Un wearing the leather jacket and sunglasses from Terminator as an intimidation tactic. Putin wants to play around? I think that calls for the loin cloth/headband look from Conan the Barbarian (sword optional). Now the USA is feared by our opponents, and we regain our position as a world superpower. Arnold probably abolishes all steroid laws in sports so they’re fun to watch again, too. Win, win, win. If a bad actor can be President, imagine what an American action hero would be able to accomplish. Arnold in 2020.

– Ryan

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