WASHINGTON (AP) – It’s long been known that America’s school kids haven’t measured well compared with international peers. Now, there’s a new twist: Adults don’t either.

In math, reading and problem-solving using technology – all skills considered critical for global competitiveness and economic strength – American adults scored below the international average on a global test, according to results released Tuesday.

Adults in Japan, Canada, Australia, Finland and multiple other countries scored significantly higher than the United States in all three areas on the test. Beyond basic reading and math, respondents were tested on activities such as calculating mileage reimbursement due to a salesman, sorting email and comparing food expiration dates on grocery store tags.

Not only did Americans score poorly compared to many international competitors, the findings reinforced just how large the gap is between the nation’s high- and low-skilled workers and how hard it is to move ahead when your parents haven’t.

In both reading and math, for example, those with college-educated parents did better than those whose parents did not complete high school.

Well suck me sideways. So calculating mileage reimbursements due to a salesman, sorting email and comparing food expiration dates on grocery store tags are all strong indicators of how smart a country’s citizens are? Count me as mentally retarded then. I mean I can sort email with the best of them, but in my 25 years on this Earth I don’t think I’ve ever compared expiration dates on grocery store tags. If I’m being completely honest, I’m not even sure what that means. If the day your in the supermarket is after the date the product expires, you don’t buy it. Seems pretty simple. Didn’t know we had to have a standardized test about it to see who was better at reading a date on a plastic bag. I went to school for 17 years. I have a bachelors degree. Did I have trouble helping my cousin in high school with her homework at Easter this year? Yes, yes I did. The point is once your done with school and get that full time job, basic stuff like addition and who won World War 2 just float out of your memory. Give us Americans a break. Our economy sucks, our government shut down and most if not all of our pets heads are falling off. The only test I’m interested in taking is how much beer can Ryan drink before he falls over.

– Ryan