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Lord Vader Gives A Young Boy a Prosthetic Arm, Recruits Him to the Dark Side

Feel good story of the week right here. Alvin gets plucked out of the crowd and is given a prosthetic arm that will ultimately change his life. Heart melting shit right here, but is anyone else wondering the obvious? Why is nobody worried about Vader and his cronies recruiting this kid to the Dark Side?! Just letting Vader waltz into this school and start brainwashing kids. Irresponsible.

-Matt

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Meet Jonathan “Vader” Rice – He’s Insane…Completely Insane.

darthchallenge

Jonathan Banks must have grown up under power lines, either that or on the Death Star.  I’m hoping the latter.  Banks decided that he was going to run across Death Valley in a Darth Vader costume (ok, the Darth attire is a power move).  But don’t worry, it was only 129 degrees when he did it…..wait? what? Jonathan classifies himself as a “heat runner”. Now i’m no runner, nothing close, but i’m pretty sure this is a classification he made up himself.  That would be like me taking a bath with a toaster and calling myself an electrical swimmer. He has a death [Valley] wish and as shocking as the whole thing is he accomplished the feat in just shy of 7 minutes. I don’t know what the length of the run was, but at 129 degrees, I know i’m not lasting 45 seconds.  Even though I think he is insane for doing this, I have to applaud a man for doing what makes him happy.  May the force be with you, Jonathan Banks.

-MattyV

PS – This is his FOURTH time doing it. I bet if he goes for the unprecedented 5th time Denny’s will give him a free grandslam.

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