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What is this “Polar Vortex” Everyone is Talking About and How Do I Avoid it?



The words “Polar Vortex” have been tossed around for last week or so, and to be honest it scares me. I have no idea what a “Polar Vortex” is, but I don’t want to stick around and find out. One minute i’m sitting on my couch watching reruns of “Three’s Company”, the next i’m being hurled into oblivion by a giant ice-storm-tornado-hail hurricane (If that’s even what it is).

Dog-Plays-with-Snow-BlowerThis poor dog had no idea what hit him. Probably just out taking a piss and BAM, Polar Votex got his ass. Frozen solid right on the spot. Is there even a defense for Polar Vortexes?

Rain = umbrella/hood.
Snow = Winter hat.
Tornado = Bath tub
High winds = Windbreaker

I am not going to be the one to stand around while a Polar Vortex, with no weaknesses, comes out of nowhere and leaves me like a human Klondike bar, no way. Until my flight leaves for the equator I will be held up, and blogging, from an undisclosed position.

(Like I’m going to give up my position so the Polar Vortex can find me. 10 steps ahead man. 10 steps.)



Netflix Must Watch: Storm Chasers

Remember all those tornadoes a few months ago that destroyed entire states? Well here are the people who actually chase these bad boys down in the name of insanity and science. It’s easy to be a couch potato observer and call these people dumb and crazy, but they have bigger balls than a pit bull ready to breed, so I’m going to save my judgment for better things. Perfect rainy day marathon show, as Netflix has the first four season in full. While they’re no Bill Paxton from Twister, they still risk life and limb  tracking these forces and nature, and that’s good enough for me.

– ryanfoges


Tragedy struck this past week in Oklahoma, where an F-5, the largest of it’s class, tornado ravaged homes and lives in middle America.  The focus of these events should be on helping the victims of the natural disaster, but I have to imagine that it will turn into a blame game sooner than later.  People pointing fingers at who could have done what, and who’s fault it is.  It’s no one’s fault, but mother natures.  That’s why it’s called a natural disaster.  In the next few days I can see politicians running to the front lines to argue  their positions on the event for political gain.  However, the only thing that should matter is the rebuilding of the lives the tornado had destroyed.  If we just had more time we could have gotten Bill Paxton down there to show this ‘nado who’s boss, but lady nature answers to no one;  Not even Bill Paxton.

On a more serious note, I’m sure there will be all types of statistics coming out about damage in dollars, injuries  and unfortunately, deaths, but the number that matters at this point is 90999.  Text the word REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10 dollars in relief for the victims of Oklahoma F-5 tornado, if I’m not mistaken it gets added right onto your cell phone bill, and every donation goes a long way.  Stay safe Oklahoma, our thoughts and prayers are with you.


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