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Gordon Ramsay’s Dwarf Porn Star Look Alike Found Dead In Badger Den Half Eaten – Because This Is The World We Live In

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Dwarf porn star Percy Foster who had an uncanny resemblance to foul mouthed TV chef Gordon Ramsay has been found dead in a badger den in Wales in what reports are calling bizarre circumstances.

The thirty five year old star f X-rated movie Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It’s Up Your Arse We Go was discovered in a badgers den, partially eaten, by Ministry of Agriculture experts who were checking the den ahead of a planned badger-gassing program.

The midget porn stars 107 centimetre (3’6″) body was discovered ‘partially gnawed’ in the badger burrow, however at the moment it is unclear how the adult actor died, suicide has not been ruled out by investigators.

Adult film producer Dexter Yamunkeh said “Percy was a little guy with big problems… He was doing well but was under pressure like everyone else in this god damn industry.”

In a recent interview Percy Foster revealed his pleasure about his growing career as Ramsay’s double, he also stated: “Porn lookalikes get more money than normal actors. Dwarf lookalikes are as rare as hen’s teeth and so can command top dollar. I’ve already ordered a new BMW and a diamond-encrusted Soda Stream.” – ShockingTimes.co.ok

I’ve said it once, and i’ll say it one thousand more times, Dwarves should stay away from badger dens. It just isn’t a smart idea. One minute you’re banging some chick on camera pretending to be a world famous chef, and the next you’re badger food. Tale as old as time.

-Matt

PS- “a diamond-encrusted Soda Stream”? That is ballin’ to a level I have only sen on the Chappelle’s show

Dave-Chappelle-cribs

Monsterblog: Porn Star Names

We’ve done a lot of hypothetical monster blogs, but this one might take the cake. If there is a demographic out there that would ever root for the Average Nobodies to become porn stars then I will have lost complete faith in humanity. There’s just certain things human eyes aren’t meant to see. That still didn’t stop us from coming us with stage names if we ever made the big time.

Franklin Railer

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