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Anonymous North Dakota Woman is Our Annual Example of People Who Take Halloween Too Seriously

(Source) “A Fargo, N.D., woman says she will give trick-or-treaters that she deems “moderately obese” a letter instead of candy this Halloween.

I just want to send a message to the parents of kids that are really overweight. … I think it’s just really irresponsible of parents to send them out looking for free candy just ’cause all the other kids are doing it,” the woman said in a morning radio interview with Y-24. She wouldn’t identify herself.

The letter states: “You child is, in my opinion, moderately obese and should not be consuming sugar and treats to the extent of some children this Halloween season.”

It continues: “My hope is that you will step up as a parent and ration candy this Halloween and not allow your child to continue these unhealthy eating habits.”

North Dakota State University assistant professor of clinical psychology Katie Gordon told Valley News Live in Fargo that the letter could be more emotionally damaging than helpful.

“It’s just that kind of thing that for some kids, if they’re vulnerable, might trigger major problems,” Gordon said. “Even if a child is overweight, they might be very healthy because of what they eat and how they exercise. It’s ineffective anyway because it’s not likely to help the kid.”


Every year somebody’s got to be the hero. There’s always the one house that hands out pennies or stamps or pencils. Single handedly eliminating obesity by not giving the 25 kids who come to your house candy. Have you seen some of these monsters? They’ll probably eat the pennies. Now you’re giving children copper poisoning. Only a sick son of a bitch would give a kid copper poisoning. But this woman is taking it to the next level. Hand writing letters condemning parents for their obese children? That’s some diabolical shit. Talk about having too much time on your hands. The funny thing is this lady honestly thinks she’s going to win a medal or something for doing this. I really hate these people who think they’re superheroes because they’re denying kids candy for a day. I got news for you: these kids get obese because they’re parents let them eat like shit and they’d rather watch tv and play video games than go outside and move around. One less Snicker’s bar on Halloween isn’t going to change that. Stop trying to be a hero and give the kids what they want: delicious, sugary, chocolatey candy.

– Ryan

P.S. Heartbreak city if you get picked out and given this letter. Those kids will never celebrate Halloween again.

Paula Deen Supporters Sending Angry Emails To The Wrong Channel Is Perfect

“Attention all those who love Paula Deen. We’ve been getting your emails. Your phone calls. We’re pretty sure the good old fashioned mail will soon follow. We get that you are mad about her contract not being renewed. The problem is, you are calling and writing the wrong people. Yes, we are The Food Channel. Have been since the 1980s, when we trademarked the name and used it for a newsletter, then a website. However, we are not The Food Network, the company that helped to make Paula Deen a household name. Nor are we The Cooking Channel. Both of those broadcast channels are owned by the Scripps Television Network. We are not owned by Scripps. We are independently owned. We do not have a full channel on TV, although we are experimenting with taking some of our shows to TV—but unless you live in select test markets, you aren’t seeing them just yet. We don’t carry programming created by Paula Deen, nor do we carry Rachael Ray, Bobby Flay, Robert Irvine, Tyler Florence, Ina Garten, Giada, or any of those celebrity chefs that everyone enjoys watching (including us!). So, the best we can do is point you to the Scripps Television Network snail mail address. And we can publish a few of your letters. You can find both at the bottom of this article. And, if Paula Deen is interested in helping to grow the real Food Channel into something that you all will watch, we are all ears. We want to take her apology seriously, and believe we can be part of helping her use this as a way to address such issues in the future, if she so desires. Tell her to contact us at” –


So this is who people are choosing to support. Gotta love racists. Just blindly spewing their beliefs if it means coming to the defense of a fellow racist. Not only are you publicly supporting a horrible human being, but you’re bashing a television network that doesn’t even carry Paula Deen’s programs. I just wish I could have been there when these people were typing up these emails. This is the moment you’re finally able to give corporate America a piece of your mind. Are you supporting an admitted racist? Sure, but its time THE MAN hears what you have to say. Oops, wrong network. Now you’re setting back our country 140 years both culturally and intellectually. If I had to pick one person to blindly support, it wouldn’t be a racist Southern belle who supports obesity in America. It would be Bill Paxton. Human stupidity is truly limitless.

– Ryan

P.S. I’m more upset that she’s a bad cook. That’s just how I roll.

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