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This RI Farmer is Embarrassing the Shit Out of Me in Front of Taylor Swift

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So apparently some farmer from this great state of ours (RI) created a “Welcome Taylor” message in his corn field.

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Dude, you’re embarrassing me in front of T Swift! Act like you’ve been there before man. This is why Rhode Island can’t have nice things. Creeps, like the guy who swam to her house and this guy who wants to lock her up in his barn, live here. I’m calling it now, Taylor is out by christmas. She will be gone without ever having meet her one true blogger love: me. It’s a damn shame, but thats how the corn stalk falls I guess.

For now, i’m going to put on a disguse and pretend I don’t live here, and no one can stop me!!!!

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-MattyV

PS- You’re a tad late on the welcome message. She moved here like 8 months ago.

 

(Photo cred crushable.com)

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Of Course Tom Bradys House Has A Moat

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If I ever lived in a house like this I’d never leave. Forget football. Forget Ugg commercials. I have a supermodel wife and literally the best house in the entire world. A house that has a moat. Drinking beers in a moat is so high on my bucket list that it’s actually disturbing. I hate Tom Brady, but goddamnit do I respect you.

– Ryan

P.S. Woof

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