Blog Archives

This Softball Player’s Backwards Home Run Swing Is Pretty God Damn Impressive

I play softball on Sunday mornings, and I’ve ran across my fair share of really good players. Softball isn’t difficult, but being good at it isn’t that easy either. Most of the time you’re playing against a team with four outfielders, which greatly diminishes your chance for a base hit. Some guys are good, some are bad, and then you have a guy like this, who hits a home run swinging backwards. That it was fast pitch makes it more impressive, but being able to do this while any ball is being pitched to you is one of the most impressive things I’ve ever seen. I’m also only batting backwards from here on out.


Giancarlo Stanton Hit A Baseball Into Orbit Last Night

Welp, that’s the farthest hit ball I’ve ever seen. The best part is the reaction from the left fielder, who just stands frozen in his stance while the ball flies over his head. Even if he had a rocket strapped to his ass, he wasn’t catching that one. According to @ESPNStatsInfo, only three other players have ever hit a homerun out of Dodgers Stadium, and now Mr. Stanton can join that list that includes Willie Stargell, Mike Piazza and Mark McGwire. Not a bad list, especially if you enjoy steroids. All kidding aside, Stanton had a freak injury last year that everyone in baseball hoped wouldn’t affect him too much, and while his average isn’t great, he can still hit the long ball, and every team in baseball wishes they had a 25 year old stud like him on their team.

– Ryan

Monster Blog Wednesday – Home Run Derby Pitchers


It’s MLB All Star week, so we decided to cater our monster blog to one of the more exciting competitions: Home Run Derby. A sometimes forgotten but key element in the Home Run Derby is the man assigned to pitch to each participant. Sometimes they’re the player’s dad, sometimes they’re the player’s coach; what the Average Nobodies might lack in baseball skill and overall strength we make up for in creativity. That’s why we pulled out the big guns for our Home Run Derby pitchers:


Mo Vaughn

staff photographer

This one was kind of a no brainer for me. I see the ball better off of righties, and Mo Vaughn was the greatest hitter with a dirty man’s beard of all time. Chances are Mo won’t throw too many strikes, but I’m a bad ball hitter so it ain’t no thing. My overall fear of not knowing where Mo is going to throw the ball will help me hit the most home runs possible. Not because it will motivate me, but because I’ll be defending my body and face against insane wildness. Also, “The Hit Dog” is one of my favorite baseball nicknames of all time, and any time you can bring an old school Sox player with you to the All Star game you have to do it. If I had 10 choices for who my pitcher would be, I’d pick Mo Vaughn ten times.


Randy “The Big Unit” Johnson



The guy feeding me the ball would have to be my favorite pitcher of all-time, Randy Johnson. Being a big guy with a strong left arm, Randy and I can relate. Even though he’s “big” in the fact that he’s tall and I’m “big” because I eat way too much Taco Bell; and the fact that he has a strong left arm because he’s was a MLB pitcher and I have a strong left arm because…well…other things. Even with those differences i’ve always had a connection with Randy. Even my nickname on my high school swim team was “The Big Unit”! Don’t ask me how I got it, because I actually still don’t get it.  Tell me for one second that staring down the barrel of that mustache and mullet wouldn’t give me the strength to blast 100 balls into the cheap seats.


Chinese Baseball Announcers Need to Work on Their Home Run Commentary

That’s a pretty long and drawn out celebration metaphor (am I using that correctly), but I do enjoy the effort. Sounds like you have some ex-girlfriend issues to work through, but when your heart is healed take a look at this and learn from a true pro, Jack Edwards:


THAT is how it’s done.


Stephen Drew Needed Glasses The Entire Season, Gets Them Game 6 Of The World Series


Heading into Game 6 of the World Series, Red Sox shortstop Stephen Drew was mired in a 4-for-50 postseason slump at the plate.

Drew had struck out 19 times.

While Drew probably heard the cries from fans critical as to why he was still in the lineup, he was actually unable to see them.

Apparently, Stephen Drew needs glasses.

According to Jon Heyman of, Drew paid a visit to the eye doctor before Wednesday night’s Game 6 World Series clincher. Drew was fitted for contact lenses and coincidentally began making contact. Drew went 2 for 4 and hit a key home run that stretched Boston’s lead to 4-0.

Of course Boston won the game and the Series and Stephen Drew saw it all. Clearly.

Classic story. Star infielder can’t see, goes the whole season without glasses, and goes 4-50 in the post season with 19 strikeouts. Then, he gets contact lenses before game 6 of The World Series, smokes a home run, and goes 2-4.

Where have I seen a story like this before? Oh yeah….


Wild Thing was a slouch before those world famous spectacles.


%d bloggers like this: