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Man is Drilling Teeth Out of His 2nd Floor Apartment

PROVIDENCE, R.I. — A Central Falls man received two years probation after admitting to running an illegal dental practice from his second-floor apartment.

Ray Guillen, 27, pleaded no contest Monday before Superior Court Judge Jeffrey A. Lanphear to operating a dental practice without a license and maintaining a common nuisance.

Central Falls police responded on April 12, 2012, to a suspected domestic assault at 77 Clay Street, Apt. 2, second floor. They discovered a dentist chair in the living room, x-ray equipment, and a cabinet filled with dental tools for drilling and cleaning, retainers, morphine, and other drugs. A vial of steroids was found in Guillen’s room as well as business cards that identified him as a tooth whitening specialist operating out of Blackstone Dental… -Providence Journal

This is why I HATE the dentists. Just some guy drugging up people and drilling the shit out of there mouths. But really, who the hell falls into this trap? Not only is it in the middle of some dudes living room, but it’s on the second floor of some apartment building in CENTRAL FALLS, Rhode Island. For those of you who do not know about Central Falls, I will just say it isn’t known for its tea parties…OR dentists offices. Completely ok for someone to do with with a barber chair, but drilling and scrapping teeth? Save that for the pros…please.


Dentist Appointments are Hell on Earth

I had a dentist appointment this morning. It’s something that I have dreaded since my last appointment 6 months ago. First thing I did today was brush my teeth like a madman, trying to make up for nearly a half-year of semi-poor oral hygiene.  Listen, i’m not saying that I don’t brush my teeth regularly, all i’m saying is sometimes I rinse out with Listerine and call it a brush job.

You walk into the waiting room at 7am, because apparently “ass crack of dawn” is the only appointments they take, and it looks like a holding tank at a Charlie Daniels concert.

beetlejuice-waiting-roomaka the waiting room from BeetleJuice

Everyone looks as miserable as you are to be there. You sit and wait for an hour, because why? Because fuck having an appointment, thats why. They are better off implementing a deli counter system for the dentist office. Take a number, take a seat, and rot away reading 2 year-old Highlights Magazines.


Finally, you get in to have your teeth cleaned. Actually, i’m not even sure you can call it a “cleaning”, it’s more like torture for your gums. The hygienist uses these primitive tools that look like something Dr. Frankenstein would use to create his next monster.  Just jagged-ass metal spikes that get shoved around your mouth all willy-nilly.  Then she has the nerve to lecture you on how “I don’t floss enough”.  Listen lady, I pay my dental insurance for this torture twice-a-year, you and me both know i’m not going to start flossing at 24. So save your breath and get back to tearing up my mouth.


If leaving the dentist battered and bruised isn’t shitty enough I just remembered I will be back in 6 months to do it again.


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