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Zach Ryder Has Lost His Mind

 

This new web series Ryder is working on has got me worried for him. First of all, the title: “Zach Ryder’s Last Rezort”? That sounds like the opening lines to a suicide note. Zach, buddy, calm down over there. I know things haven’t been going well for you in the WWE, but you haven’t faded away. Just keep keeping on. No need to smash your United States Championship. Not sure WWE will want to see that either.

-Matt

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The Title Belt the WWE is Giving the Cy Young Winners is Cooler Than Any Other Sports Trophy

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The WWE just making every other sports trophy look stupid. You’re lying to yourself if you say you don’t need this. This is by far the coolest award any human being can be given. A title belt with your face on one side and your team logo on the other. Class on top of class. Just shows you how smart Vinnie Mac is. Basically throwing the old Cy Young trophy under the bus. I wouldn’t be surprised if he challenged Bud Selig to a steel cage match at the Royal Rumble this year. He just gets more unpredictable as the years go on.

As a side note, what are the odds Scherzer and Kershaw ever pitch again? If I ever got a title belt from the WWE for any achievement I’d retire the same day. No Cy Young, MVP or World Series trophy can ever trump the title belt. Game, set, Vincent Kennedy McMahon.

– Ryan

Vladimir Putin Awarded Grandmaster Status in Taekwondo Even Though He Doesn’t Do Taekwondo

“Russian president Vladimir Putin has been  awarded the highest rank in taekwondo, giving him honorary grandmaster  status.

It means the president has attained a higher  ranking than former US martial artist Chuck Norris. The actor has an  eight-degree black belt, while Mr. Putin has a ninth-degree.

The president does not  practice taekwondo, but holds a black belt in Judo and has been awarded an  eighth Dan in the martial art by the International Judo Federation.”

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Oh Putin doesn’t study taekwondo? He practices Judo? That’s adorable, now give him the 9th degree black belt and grandmaster status before he wrestles a bear and kicks your ass. If I ruled an entire country I’d probably pull off power moves like this too. Shoot bow and arrows shirtless. Get 9th degree black belts in something he doesn’t even practice. Your move, Chuck Norris.

– Ryan

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