Blog Archives
Fired From New York, It’s Saturday Night Live: Farewell Brooks Wheelan
Had a blast and loved every second of it. I’m totally honored to be able to make this next joke… FIRED FROM NEW YORK IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT!
— Brooks Wheelan (@brookswheelan) July 14, 2014
The first of what I’m assuming many pegs to fall during SNL’s offseason is Brooks Wheelan. He was the most logical choice to go since he was in very few sketches which really contributed to him not leaving much of an impression on the SNL audience. SNL has always been better with a smaller cast, as it gives the featured players more of a chance to shine, so Brooks and the rest of the roster cuts should be viewed as a positive. Plus, it’s never bad for an aspiring comedian or comedy actor to have a year of SNL under his/her belt. At least he’ll always have his favorite moments:
– Ryan
The Boyz II Men Pretzel Love Songs Marketing Campaign for Wendy’s Is Genius
Just when I thought I couldn’t love Wendy’s any more, they pull Boyz II Men out of retirement or a nursing home and have them read actual tweets about Wendy’s new pretzel bun. Do I love the pretzel bun? Yes. Do I love Boyz II Men? Also yes. Does listening to Boyz II Men read tweets about people’s lust for pretzels make me want a Wendy’s pretzel bun sandwich? Kind of. Job well done, Wendy’s. I’ll always support you:
Let’s see what the Iron Sheik thinks about the pretzel love songs:
Break your fucking neck like a jabroni pretzel #PretzelLoveSongs
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) July 15, 2014
Alrighty then.
– Ryan
Rihanna is the Female Version of Drake, Parties With the German Soccer Team After Their World Cup Victory
So @rihanna got a pictue with the World’s biggest hero @MarioGoetze. pic.twitter.com/h8wbLPiL7U
— Chris Palmer (@ChrisPalmerNBA) July 14, 2014
Haha Rihanna pic.twitter.com/JAFQ8ycmh1
— Bayern & Germany (@BayernMunchenF1) July 14, 2014
King Klose pic.twitter.com/9kH8Gt422C
— Rihanna (@rihanna) July 14, 2014
Rihanna is such a HUGE Germany fan. The only credit she gets is that tweeted out a weirdly photo shopped picture of herself in a German flag bikini before the game. Other than that, I never really understood this outlook. Drake does the same thing with the NBA. He’s from Toronto, where he can be seen sitting courtside lint rolling his pants because if I’m a player on the Raptors THAT’S who I want rooting me on. But then he goes to the All Star game in a Lebron jersey or has weekly tea and scrumpet’s dates with Dwight Howard and Kevin Durant. Drake must’ve rubbed off on Rihanna (you’re welcome) because she’s rooted for just about every team in the World Cup. On her twitter she’s rooted for the Netherlands, Belgium, France, USA and Germany. I can understand not having a dog in the race and just kind of having fun, but where is the loyalty? It can’t be fun just rooting on whatever team advances to the next round. Rooting for a team that breaks your heart makes you who you are. It’s the beauty of sports, which makes the winning part that much more fun. Maybe Rihanna has figured out some sort of sports fan loophole, but I think you should stick to your guns. I’m sure the German soccer team would’ve partied with her no matter what team she rooted for. Lucky sons of bitches.
– Ryan
So Warren Sapp is a Jackass
BOY – Warren Sapp was flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct on Tuesday.
The Hall of Fame defensive tackle was outed on Twitter for not leaving a tip for a 26-year-old waitress after watching the U.S. vs. Belgium World Cup game at Upper Deck Sports Bar and Grill in Miami.
The bill cost $69.39, but Sapp wrote on it “boys don’t tip,” after the waitress called Sapp and his friend “boys.”
Sapp defended his actions on Twitter, also adding that the service was indeed poor.
“She kept calling us boys so the tip Fit!” Sapp tweeted.
“I left it was horrible and the service was the worst,” he added.
The waitress, who is only going by Corey, spoke with WINZ-AM in Miami to give her side of the story.
Corey added she did not think calling them “boys” was offensive.
“It’d just be [like] if I went up to a table of girls, I’d say ‘hey girls’–or ‘hey ladies.’”
Restaurant server says Warren Sapp came to watch US game, stiffed her on tip pic.twitter.com/DZxkS7Y58w
— darren rovell (@darrenrovell) July 2, 2014
I think it’s time to face the music, Warren. You weren’t mad this waitress called you and your friend “boys”. You weren’t mad at the service. You’re broke. You’ve been broke. Yet you still want to go out and have some beers and spend money like an ex NFL player should, except you’re an idiot and don’t have any money left. Usually when waitresses or whoever put receipts online it’s unnecessary, but I’m glad this got out. Warren Sapp had all this “swag” when he was a player and exudes the same “confidence” as an analyst. I call false bravado if you can’t tip a waitress on a $60 check. I think it’s time for Warren to go “college kid”: ramen noodles, cold pasta and hot pockets. At least then he’d be putting his money where his mouth is.
– Ryan
The NFL GIFs Twitter Account is off to a Roaring Start
Lets start this off right. The Butt Fumble GIF! http://t.co/fDSHWFhPpa
— NFL GIFs (@TheNFLGIF) June 19, 2014
For those of you who do not know, Twitter just recently started allowing GIFs to be tweeted out on their platform. The first account to capitalize on this technologic advancement is the NFL with the creation of @TheNFLGIF. Of course you need the butt fumble as your first twitter GIF, any other one would be a huge disappointment. Kudos, NFL.
Give them a follow! twitter.com/thenflggif
-Matt
Oh Happy Day – Dumb and Dumber To Trailer Will Be Released This Tuesday on The Tonight Show
Finally! Dumb and Dumber To trailer will debut Tuesday, June 10th on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon! Don’t miss it! P
— Farrelly Brothers (@farrellybros) June 4, 2014
Well this is the best news since sliced bread, and I LOVE sliced bread. Dumb and Dumber is one of the funniest movies of all time and is easily the most re-watchable comedy ever. I’ve seen it at least 100 times and find a new favorite scene/line each time. It’s also very cool that they’re releasing it on The Tonight Show. Instead of just a random release before some comedy movie this summer, The Tonight Show release gives it a big movie feel. Plus, anytime you can get Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels in a room together, magic is about to happen. I can’t wait for Tuesday, and I can’t wait for November 14th. Throw another shrimp on the Barbie!
– Ryan
Let’s Check in on Jaden Smith and See How He’s Doing
It’s time to pay a visit to our favorite twitter account. Lets see what the wise, Jayden Smith has to say.
Obviously Shia LaBeouf And Edgar Casey Are The a Only Ones Who Know What’s Going On Here.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) May 14, 2014
You know somethings wrong when you endorse Shia LaBeouf
Fixed Habits To Respond To Authority Takes 12 Years. Have Fun 😀👍
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) May 12, 2014
No idea what this means
You Can Discover Everything You Need To Know About Everything By Looking At Your Hands
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) May 10, 2014
And to think, all that money I spent on college when I could have just been staring at my hands.
When You Live Your Whole Life In A Prison Freedom Can Be So Dull.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) May 1, 2014
When you’re right you’re right… I guess?
Young Jaden: Here’s The Deal For Every Time Out You Give Me, You’ll Give Me 15 Dollars For Therapy When I Get Older.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) April 26, 2014
Time outs have apparently caused permanent damage to Jayden
Teo Quotes: Bro I Just Wanna Come To The Ultimate Understanding.
— Jaden Smith (@officialjaden) April 23, 2014
Don’t we all?
To All Those Who Think the WWE is Fake…
Trust is completely dead to me. pic.twitter.com/ytvu6LSO1r
— Roman Reigns (@WWERomanReigns) June 3, 2014
Maybe it’s just me, but I wouldn’t want my back to look like that. Roman Reigns got the shit beat out of him with a Singapore cane Sunday night and then a steel chair last night. Just another day at the office. SO FAKE.
-Ryan
