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Liam Neeson Teams up With Clash of Clans and Brings an Awesome Superbowl Commercial Straight to my Eye Balls

I would like to start by saying that if I wasn’t already playing Clash of Clans 5 hours a day I would have started last night because of THIS commercial. Bravo by the people at Clash of Clans getting the person that can perfectly describe how i’m feeling when I get a notification saying someone has destroyed my village. Revenge is a dish best served by Liam Neeson.

-Matt

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Who Knew Joe Namath and His Fancy Coat Would Be the Most Entertaining Part of the Superbowl

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All I have to say is thank God for Broadway Joe. If he and his fur coat didn’t show up last night then this already horrible Superbowl would have been that much worse. I’m sure Seahawks fans were ecstatic, but as a casual fan that Superbowl sucked. You knew who was going to win 12 seconds into the game. Joe even tried to hijack the coin toss because he knew how terrible the game was going to be. Peyton Manning and the Broncos got their asses handed to them, and never even tried to put up a fight. All I know after this game is that Joe Namath has a beautiful fashion sense and as much as it pains me to say it, the Seahawks are far and away the best team in football. Damn it all.

– Ryan

The ‘Beast Mode’ Sausage Sandwich is Almost as Stupid as Pete Carroll’s Stupid Face

Seahawks suck – It’s time to grub up for the Super Bowl, and with the Seattle Seahawks facing  off against the Denver Broncos, there is a unique cuisine to sample from these  Western cities.

You could start your day on a Seattle kick, with a warm coffee from your  local Starbucks. Then, for lunch, transition across the Rocky Mountains to  Denver and get your lunch fix at a Quiznos or a Chipotle. As you settle down  before the start of the game, put some craft beers into the ice chest so they  can chill in time for kickoff.

But if you’re looking for a meal that screams “Go Seahawks,” look no farther  than the Beast Mode Sausage.

Named after the Seahawks bruising running back, Marshawn Lynch, who has been  given the Beast Mode moniker for his style of running, this sausage mirrors  Lynch’s football personality. A butcher in Puyallup, Wash. has combined sweet  and spicy meat with Skittles, the candy of choice for Lynch.

That’s right – sausage with Skittles on the inside.

So while the 12th man may have to travel across the country to cheer their  team on live in Metlife Stadium, at least they will have something to snack on  as they prepare for the championship game.

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The Seahawks couldn’t just beat my 49ers and be done with it. Now they have to make a travesty out of my favorite sandwich. What’s next? Are they going to cancel my favorite TV shows? Beat up my grandma? There are only three things that should go on a sausage sandwich: peppers, onions and mustard. Not skittles. Never skittles. You’re insulting sausage lovers everywhere, which I now realize sounds a little weird. But the seahawks are basically rebelling against America. And if anyone is looking to point a finger of blame, point it at this world class asshole..

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I hate you Pete Carroll. I hope your burn with Satan in the depths of hell.

– Ryan

Can We Just Leave Beast Mode Alone?

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Clearly the guy doesn’t enjoy talking with the media, can we just leave it alone? I think it is totally ridiculous that there are provisions written into NFL contracts that force players to speak with the media under penalty of fine. These are professional athletes we are talking about! First off, most of them sound like idiots because guess what? They weren’t studying Shakespeare in college! Secondly, the ones you do hear from, and that can speak well, will speak to the media. They will do this with or without a rule in their contract. Is it really necessary to put a guy like Lynch on blast for doing the bare minimum at media day?

-Matt

PS- Deion, would you have liked to be harassed like this if you didn’t want to speak with media back when you played? HELL NO. Beast mode is clearly hiding from you and everyone else. Feed him some Skittles and move on!

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Richard Sherman is Now Public Enemy Number One

Boy, that escalated quickly. I could’ve swore the Seahawks won the game and were going to the Superbowl. Here’s my only problem with this: Sherman went after Crabtree and the 49ers postgame, to a sideline reporter. There is no doubt in my mind Crabtree and every other 49er were talking trash all game. It’s football; nowadays, it’s just another part of the game. If Sherman had a problem with Crabtree, or anyone else for that matter, he should’ve handled it on the field. Instead, he made the play of the game, then walked over to Crabtree and mockingly stuck his hand out, got flagged and ran off the field. Again, I don’t care about the trash talk. But calling someone out when he’s already left the field, especially when you had the chance to say your peace 5 minutes earlier, doesn’t sit right with me. Good luck in Jersey, Mr. Sherman. I hope Peyton eats you alive.

– A bitter 49ers fan

How About The Grapes on this Seahawks Fan

1511200_681717198541706_1064072218_nI mean, i’m not one to talk about tattoos (I have a rocket ship tattooed to my arm) but this one is a ballsy as you can get. Either this guy ate paint chips as a kid or he traveled to the future and saw the this year’s Superbowl happen. Those are the only two causes of this particular piece of body art. Well, good luck to you sir. I will be rooting for the 9ers so you look like an idiot.

(Picture courtesy of ESPN)

-Matt

 

Stupidest Move of the Century: No tailgating will be allowed at Super Bowl XLVIII

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Fans who expect to grill out before Super Bowl XLVIII can think again. The game’s committee CEO, Al Kelly, said there will be no tailgating at the MetLife Stadium in East Rutherford, N.J.,  before the game, reports Jane McManus of ESPN.com.
“You will be allowed to have food in your car and have drink in you car,” Kelly said. “And provided you’re in the boundaries of a single parking space, you’ll be able to eat or drink right next to your car. However you’re not going to be able to take out a lounge chair, you’re not going to be able to take out a grill and you’re not going to be able to take up more than one parking space. And it’ll all be watched very carefully.” – SI.com

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This has got to be a bluff. I mean, there is no way Al Kelly is that evil, is there? How could you possibly take away tailgating at the SUPERBOWL. There has to be something in the bible against it, and if there isn’t then I think we should amend that.

This is a travesty on a bunch of different levels. For one, this year the Superbowl happens to be in New York, which, if you don’t own a map, is going to be cold as fuck. Grills and trash can fires are going to be all that keeps fans alive before the game. Secondly, what the hell is everyone going to do all those hours before the game on Superbowl Sunday? Are they expected to just show up on time like some kind of animal? This isn’t soccer, people!

If I know my NFL fans like I think I do, putting the kibosh on tailgating won’t stop these animals.

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At least I can rest easy knowing that WWE isn’t this stupid. How were these guys (us)

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supposed to finish this much beer

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in the parking lot at 10am, without  tailgating? Wouldn’t have happened.

-Matt

The Doritos Dance Will Haunt You

If this is one of the finalists for the Doritos Superbowl commercial then I need to have a small chat with the judges.

-MattyV

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