The Philadelphia Eagles won their first ever Super Bowl last night. Unless you went out of your way to avoid being alive, you probably already knew that. Backup QB Nick Foles out dueled the GOAT Tom Brady in one of the most exciting Super Bowl games in history. You might even say Foles had a little bit of Rocky in him.
Eagles Win The Super Bowl
With Philadelphia celebrating it’s first Super Bowl, this song felt appropriate for Music Monday. Fly Eagles fly.
Average Nobodies Podcast
for February 1, 2018.
On today’s show we’re chatting about what we’re watching, David Copperfield, last Sunday’s Royal Rumble, this Sunday’s Super Bowl, Elon Musk’s new flamethrower & the latest on Logan Paul. You can chat with us on Twitter, toss us a like on Facebook and heart all our pictures on Instagram. Don’t forget, this podcast is available on iTunes, Stitcher Radio and YouTube.
– @ryanfoges @mattfromri
I’m pretty sure it’s a rule that any major sporting event has to have an official song. If you’re the NFL, chances are you’re asking Carrie Underwood to perform that song. She sings the opening for Sunday Night Football and is an overall pleasure whenever she’s on TV. With NBC hosting the Winter Olympics and Superbowl LII, Underwood was called upon to deliver a jam. She did not disappoint.
Carrie Underwood featuring Ludacris – The Champion
I first heard this song Saturday and I haven’t listened to another song since. Carrie Underwood is her natural, wonderful self and Ludacris is the master of rapping over pop beats. If this was NBC’s plan to get me to tune in to the Winter Olympics, it worked like a charm.
Full disclosure: I’m not a Patriots fan, but after these last few months, it’s getting harder and harder not to like Tom Brady. Not only does he lead the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history, but he breaks the passing yards record for a single Super Bowl and wins me a nice sum of money. On top of that, he gave football fans what will probably go down as one of, if not THE greatest Super Bowl in NFL history (unless you live in the Atlanta area). Off the field he owns social media, and the main reason are posts like this. For those that don’t know, Brady’s game worn jersey went missing the night of the Super Bowl and has yet to be found. While it’s currently valued at over $500,000, it’ll probably never be found, because it’s impossible to sell it publicly without getting arrested. That’s not stopping Tom from building a suspect board and trying out a little bit of vigilante justice. The suspects include Julian Edelman, Lady Gaga, Pyat Pree from Game of Thrones, Norm Snively from Air Bud, O’Doyle from Billy Madison, Gollum, Tom Brady’s own handsome dog and my personal favorite, Prison Michael Scott. If this suspect board doesn’t find the thief, then I’m afraid all hope is lost.
— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) February 2, 2017
In case you’ve been living under a combination of sticks and moss (living under a rock is overused) Barstool Sports has been dominating late night television this week with The Rundown on Comedy Central. It’s a condensed version of their usual podcast featuring El Pres, KFC & Big Cat, and if you haven’t checked out the podcast or the three episodes that aired on CC this week then you’re really missing out. They can be a little over the top but they’re funny, and I think we could all use a little funny right now. While the first two nights were relatively calm, last night they dropped a bombshell: 29 year old Indianapolis Colts punter Pat McAfee simultaneously announced his retirement and that he’d be joining Barstool in an exclusive press conference. They were hyping a huge announcement all day on social media with the hashtag ‘own the moon’, but nobody had any idea what it was. I wouldn’t have been able to guess an active NFL punter was joining their team in my wildest dreams. Barstool is becoming a legit powerhouse in the media because of their work ethic and constant content, and if they’re able to continue to add professional athletes to their team, they might actually end up owning the moon.
And then there were four. The first two weeks of the playoff’s are behind us, and four teams survived to make it to Championship Sunday. Green Bay invades Atlanta while Pittsburgh tries to do the almost impossible and beat Tom Brady in January in New England. Here are our predictions.
Green Bay @ Atlanta (-5)
Both home teams are decent favorites this weekend, but the NFC title game is the only one I can see being an upset. Here’s how I picture Vegas sports books who are rooting for the under watching this game:
The over/under on this game is a whopping 60.5, but I’d be shocked if we saw anything less than 70 overall points scored. In Green Bay’s case, last week’s game showed us two things: Aaron Rodgers may be some type of human/sorcerer hybrid and Green Bay’s defense can’t hold a lead. Luckily for Green Bay, Aaron Rodgers will still be there QB Sunday. Unfortunately, they’ll also trot out the same defense, except this time they’re facing Matt Ryan and the Falcons. Ryan will most likely win the MVP this year, and for good reason. He threw for 38 TDs against only 7 interceptions while completing 70% of his passes. That was good for a 117.1 QB rating, which happened to be the best in the league. Last week against a Seattle defense that was 8th against the pass this year, Ryan threw for 338 yards and 3 touchdowns. Green Bay was 31st against the pass this year, and gave up over 300 yards and 3 touchdowns to Dak Prescott last week. Unless GB can force some turnovers, not even Aaron Rodgers will be able to save them.
Which brings me to Aaron Rodgers. While he finally threw an interception last week (breaking his streak of 22 TDs without a pick) he also did this:
— cнiρ вroωn (@ChipBrown) January 16, 2017
He’s playing out of his mind right now, and he’s the only reason the Falcons aren’t favored by double digits in this game. The bad news for Rodgers and the Packers is that he’ll either be without Jordy Nelson and Davante Adams or they’ll be extremely limited. Coach Mike McCarthy said today that if this were a regular season game both guys wouldn’t be playing, which is never a good sign. Also, Atlanta’s defense looked great last week, picking off Russell Wilson twice. If they’re able to force even one turnover from Rodgers, that could be enough to put away the Packers with the way Matt Ryan and the Falcons offense is playing.
Pick: Falcons 45 Green Bay 34
Pittsburgh @ New England (-6)
Isn’t is funny how teams going up against the Patriots always seem to shoot themselves in the foot before the game even starts? Whether it’s Rex Ryan or Richard Sherman, the way other teams behave when they’re playing the Pats is like clock work. Someone opens their mouth and calls out the Patriots, they play the game and Tom Brady and Bill Belichick move on to the next round or win the Super Bowl. The most recent example we have is thanks to Antonio Brown and Mike Tomlin. Brown decided that going on Facebook live during a postgame victory speech by his coach was a good idea, and caught Tomlin calling the Patriots assholes. In the grand scheme of things that’s pretty minor, but do you really want to give the Patriots more ammo heading into this game? You’re already 6 point underdogs, and earlier in the day you watched Brady and Belichick improve to 119-21 at home in their careers, including 16-2 in the playoffs. Maybe shut your mouth and hope Le’Veon Bell can score you a hundred touchdowns. Anyway, here’s what I think Pittsburgh fans will look like after the game:
There are a lot of stats that prove Brady and Belichick’s dominance, especially at home, but it comes down to one simple point: they just don’t lose. Recently, they haven’t even TRAILED IN A GAME. Check out this stat I found on Twitter:
Stat o’ week @NFLResearch:
Patriots haven’t trailed since 11/27. 6 hrs, 1 min, and 56 secs of game time. Longest @NFL streak in 11 years.
— Andrew Siciliano (@AndrewSiciliano) January 18, 2017
How insane is that? That’s without Gronk, and without their ‘best defensive player’ Jaimie Collins who they traded away midseason. No matter what happens, the Pats always find a way to win. Most of my friends are Patriots fans, and playing Pittsburgh was their worst case scenario, but that’s only because the other options in the AFC were almost comical. The other four AFC teams that the Pats could’ve played were the Raiders (without Derek Carr), the Dolphins (without Ryan Tannehill), the Chiefs (Andy Reid, play caller. Enough Said) & the Texans. They played the Texans last week and won a very ugly game, but again, they still didn’t trail the entire time. While Pittsburgh might be the toughest matchup for them, they’re only tough compared to the other birthday cake matchups they could’ve had.
As far as Pittsburgh goes, Ben showed last week why his team is so much worse on the road, as he threw for 224 yards, 0 TDs and 1 interception. Pittsburgh won that game thanks to Le’Veon Bell, Chris Boswell and Alex Smith being Alex Smith. While Bell has been unstoppable all year, Belichick specializes in taking away your best weapon, and if I’m aware of Ben’s home/road splits, I’m going to assume Belichick is too. He’ll do his best to focus on Bell and make Ben beat him through the air, something Roethlisberger hasn’t proven he can do on the road against a decent defense. Also, if Pittsburgh is banking on Brady playing anywhere near as bad as Alex Smith did, they should forfeit now.
Pick: Patriots 38 Steelers 26
The Pro Bowl. What used to be a kind of cool tradition has turned into a popularity contest wrapped into 3 hours of “who gives a shit” television. Never fear! The Average Nobodies have a fix for this bore-fest. Here are our modifications to the Pro Bowl that will either end it abruptly or keep it going for years to come.
5v5 Flag Football
Each NFL team selects 5 players from either the starting lineup or their practice squad and heads to Hawaii for a little flag football tourney. Limiting injuries, while still making it fun is key to the Pro Bowl. “But Matt, the two teams that will be playing in the Super Bowl won’t participate.” That’s an easy fix. The two open slots will be filled by the two teams in the amateur tournament that happens the day before.
No run plays, only hail Mary pass plays, the flags are coated with pam cooking spray and touchdowns don’t count unless you do a 5 minute celebration dance. The refs are their to sign your touchdown points from a 1 to 10 scale depending on how good your celebration is.
You want to get the ratings up for the pro bowl? Make it like an athletic version of the purge. Make the tickets free for fans because if they go there’s a chance they’re gonna get murdered. 2 hours of pure mayhem, with each player getting to bring weapon to the dance. Most of these guys hate each other anyways, right? You’re telling me if Josh Norman brought a trident and Odell Beckham Jr. brought a grenade you wouldn’t tune into the Pro Bowl to see what happens? You may tell yourself you wouldn’t watch, but deep down you’re just as deranged as the rest of us. Also, ‘Guns’ Hochuli as the referee and when I say referee I mean hes just there to confirm the murders.
Liam Neeson Teams up With Clash of Clans and Brings an Awesome Superbowl Commercial Straight to my Eye Balls
I would like to start by saying that if I wasn’t already playing Clash of Clans 5 hours a day I would have started last night because of THIS commercial. Bravo by the people at Clash of Clans getting the person that can perfectly describe how i’m feeling when I get a notification saying someone has destroyed my village. Revenge is a dish best served by Liam Neeson.