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The Real Winner Of The Mayweather Pacquiao Fight Was The Burger King

Best million dollars ever spent. When I was watching the fight Saturday I had already had a few beers, so I honestly thought I was hallucinating the Burger King into existence in Floyd Mayweather’s entourage. I was the Burger King one year for Halloween and I thought he was coming back to haunt me in a vulnerable moment. Alas, it was not a dream, and the Burger King really was at the fight and walked Floyd to the ring. My personal disgust for Floyd Mayweather as a living, breathing being aside, this was awesome. According to UPROXX, the digital consumption around Burger King has increased 1,343% since the fight. While I have no idea what that means, 1,343 is a high number, so it must be good. Why is Burger King working so closely with a piece of shit like Floyd Mayweather? Well, that’s a story for a different time, but for now, the King is in.

– Ryan


How The Mighty Have Fallen: Danica Patrick Will No Longer Be Sponsored By GoDaddy

USASprint Cup driver Danica Patrick will lose her primary sponsor and longtime benefactor next season as GoDaddy will not return to NASCAR, USA TODAY Sports has learned.

Patrick, 33, is in the final year of her contract at Stewart-Haas Racing and now in search of a primary sponsor for next season.

GoDaddy is looking to sign her to a personal services contract but will no longer sponsor her No. 10 Chevrolet race car.


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The sun is shining a little brighter today. The grass seems greener, the sky seems bluer, and I have a little extra pep in my step. The demon known as Danica Patrick is starting her slow decline into obscurity and I could not be happier. Danica Patrick likes to pick on the little people and never expected the consequences to smack her directly in the face. She’s a terror and a plague to this world and now she’s getting what she deserves. I hope no one sponsors her (on a serious note why would they? she sucks) and she’s forced to sell hot dogs just so she can get into the Nascar races. Nobody sues The Average Nobodies and gets away with it. NOBODY.

– Ryan

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