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South Park Took On Gluten & Ebola With Flying Dicks

Trey Parker and Matt Stone must have sat around their luxurious mansions with huge smiles on their face during South Park’s latest hiatus, because between the end of season 17 and the beginning of season 18 last week, their has been no shortage of crazy news stories. Parker and Stone could probably do a whole season dedicated to the shit show that is now the NFL, but that’s not their style. Last night they decided to poke fun at both the gluten craze and the Ebola epidemic in typical South Park fashion: with flying dicks.

The beginning of the episode included one of my favorite South Park tropes: story continuity. In the season premiere, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman alienated everyone they knew during the rise and fall of their Washington Redskins kick starter campaign. When they tried to come back to school after their kick starter failed, their former friends abandoned them. I understand we don’t watch South Park to pick apart the storylines like it’s an epic, but the little things they put into each show are worth commending.

The rest of the episode focused on the fearsome foursome trying to win their friends back with a huge party for lifelong diabetic Scott Malkinson. Their plans for pizza and cake and Lourde were foiled however, when South Park (and the rest of America) found out that consuming gluten makes your dick fly off. As a former bartender and waiter, the gluten free craze is one of the most annoying things in the world. Yes, some people suffer from gluten allergies; but please, for the love of Bill Paxton, stop talking about it. Nobody cares. South Park was able to merge the gluten free craze with the Ebola craze, quarantining any gluten consumers in the nearest Papa Johns. My only regret from this episode was that a drunken Papa John didn’t save the day while riding a pizza helicopter. A man can still dream.

– Ryan

Monster Blog Wednesday – Favorite Animated Characters

This weeks Monster Blog is dedicated to the actors and actresses that are brought to life by a pen an paper. The cartoon, animated movies, and comic strips alike are all examples for places with underrated talent. These colorful pencil strokes often get forgotten during award season and thats a shame. That’s why The Average Nobodies are dedicating this weeks Monster Blog to our favorite animated characters.

Homer Jay Simpson


No TV or movie actor has given me more enjoyment than Homer Simpson. Ever since I was a kid, my brother an I would binge on Simpson episodes for hours on end. Christmas vacation week meant one thing: Simpsons marathons until our eyes bled. Every time I see this yellow shaded fellow on the tube this nostalgic feeling comes over me and I get transported back to simpler times. The way he loves donuts, beer, and his family (usually in that order) makes for a guy that I can relate with.

– Matt

Eric Theodore Cartman

Like The Simpsons, South Park has been on the air forever, and animated or not, that can’t happen for a TV show unless they have timeless characters. It’s hard to argue that any television character has had a funnier/more psychopathic legacy than Eric Cartman. In a show filled with great characters, it’s the pudgy, foul mouthed blue hat wearing youngster that stands out above the rest. Between his hatred for Kyle (and most Jewish people), his entrepreneurial spirit and his general horrible, selfish behavior, Eric Cartman has permanently entered the hearts and minds of everyone who has seen the show. While he’s had so many great moments on the show, his crowning achievement was in “Scott Tenorman Must Die”, where he exacted revenge on his bully by making Scott Tenorman eat his own parents. It doesn’t get any crazier than that.

– Ryan

South Park Premiered Last Night With One of It’s Funniest Episodes in Years

The best part about South Park is their attention to detail (changing RGIII to Kirk Cousins from Sunday to last night) and the way they can make you laugh out loud while sneaking a really great story into an episode. Last night’s episode did all of those things. Trey Parker and Matt Stone have been on the air for 18 seasons now, and they have become our go to satirists for the modern day shit show that is the world. I expected them to satire the Redskins scandal, and the NFL, and ISIS, but not all in one episode. If you saw the episode. you know it was a classic, and if you haven’t, I don’t want to spoil anything for you because this was amazing. The cowboys/redskins bit at the end was so great on so many levels, and +1 million for the Jerry Jones BJ scene. Never change, South Park.

– Ryan

H/T @WorldofIsaac

South Park Season 18 Starts Wednesday, & They’re Taking On the Redskin’s Controversy

No show satires current events better than South Park, so it’s no surprise that they’ve decided to focus their attention on the Washington Redskin’s team name scandal. The clip is short, but it shows me enough: Cartman has started a business (and has a sweet new haircut) called the Washington Redskins, and current owner of the Washington Redskins Dan Snyder is not happy about it. You had me at Cartman. South Park season 18 (!) premieres Wednesday at 10pm.

– Ryan

Best Written TV Shows of All Time: Hits and Misses

Best Written TV Shows of All Time

The link above will take you to yahoo’s list of the 25 best written tv shows of all time. No shit. Now to be honest I’m a supremely biased human, and I haven’t seen a lot of these shows, but here’s a few thoughts on the list.

The Sopranos is a clear cut number 1. Done and done. Amazing storyline, theme, characters, top to bottom this show captivated anyone and everyone who watched it. The Wire? Probably my favorite show all time. The human element of this shows makes the viewer feel what it’s like to be apart of a crime stricken city where no matter who you are, knowledge is power. Then there’s the classic comedies. SNL, Seinfeld, Friends, Cheers, etc. but I find myself furious to see the Simpsons on there.

Is the show well written? Maybe, but it’s not South Park. No television show outside of a news outlet stays as current and satirically witty as South Park. Throw in the fact they produce an animated show in 6 days, of this caliber, and to me it’s top ten easy.

I see a lot of other shows on there that I’m unsure of their quality, but assume they’re included simply because of their long runs and nostalgic feel. See MASH, Twilight Zone, and the Dick Van Dyke Show.

I really only decided to write this because I’m a huge fan of South Park and KNOW they don’t get the respect they deserve (although the creators don’t want/need it). I’d probably get made fun of for writing this if I was more famous as well. Anyway, I’ve said my peace and as far as the the best written shows of all time, South Park, in my eyes, deserves a seat at the head table….budday.


PS I kind of hope I get made fun of by them with this post