Blog Archives

Jimmy Fallon’s Throwback Thursday: Real People, Fake Arms With Seth Rogen

When Seth Rogen is involved in a sketch, you kind of have to expect marijuana to be involved and SURPRISE this sketch takes place at a marijuana dispensary. This is part one of a two part sketch, so will part two be featured next week? Yes. The answer is yes.

– Ryan

My Favorite Sketch From Charlize Theron’s SNL: Bikini Beach Party

Charlize Theron’s second hosting stint on SNL was kind of meh overall, but I really enjoyed the Bikini Beach party sketch. Even though you knew the whale was eventually going to explode, it kind of took me by surprise and worked well. The funniest part about this sketch is that it’s not that absurd. Whales do wash up on the beach and explode from time to time, I just don’t know that I’d take a girl looking for a kiss to the one spot on the beach where there is a whale carcass. But thats why Taran Killam is on SNL and I’m not. Also, ukulele for life.

-Ryan

Monster Blog Wednesday: Best Jimmy Fallon Skits

It’s no longer a contest: Jimmy Fallon owns the sketch portion of late night TV. I still prefer Conan in the monologue, but whether it was Late Night with Jimmy Fallon or The Tonight Show, Fallon consistently delivers funny and creative skits. Here are a few of our favorites.

The Evolution of Dad Dancing – Late Night

Kind of an under the radar skit back from Fallon’s Late Night days. I think I like this skit so much because this is 100% how I dance at the bar. I get a couple of drinks in me and I’m out on the dance floor makings things happen. I gotta say Jimmy Fallon absolutely nails all of these moves. I usually start off with the simple “clap when you want to” which immediately turns into the “clap and shake” which lasts the rest of the night. I know what you’re thinking and the answer is no, it is not very impressive, but it’s all I got.

– Ryan

Real People Fake Arms – Late Night

Real people, fake arms, is gold for two reasons: Jimmy Fallon and Steve Carell. I don’t think it is physically possible for Jimmy Fallon to keep a straight face during a skit, and you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way. Carell, always professional, and Fallon always laughing. I bet by now you are probably screaming at the computer screen, “what about JUSTIN?!” Come on people, do I really need to point out how awesome JT can be in a comedy sketch? Does a dog need to be taught how to bury a bone? Does a bird need to be reminded how to fly? Does Bill Paxton need to prove he discovered the Titanic? No, the answer is no.

-Matt

Check Out the Best Sketch From Andrew Garfield’s SNL: ‘The Beygency’

SNL’s pre taped sketches have been on point this year. Ed Norton’s Wes Anderson spoof, Louis C.K.’s Darth Vader doctor visit, Bruce Willis’s Boy Dance Party. All those were great sketches, but last Saturday’s The Beygency might take the cake. This was far and away my favorite part of the episode, as Andrew Garfield looked pretty nervous throughout most of his live sketches. I don’t want to spoil the sketch, but there’s a pretty cool/topical cameo which makes it that much better. The funniest part about this whole thing is that America absolutely has a weird obession with Beyonce, and I’m not 100% sure that something like the Beygency doesn’t actually exist. Just a group of mysterious hitmen tapping into our cell phones and living rooms waiting for someone to speak out against Queen Bey. All I know is the next time ‘XO’ comes on my radio I’m not changing that channel. Might even belt out a verse or two.

– Ryan

Louis C.K’s SNL Promo’s Are Here and We’re That Much Closer to Saturday Night!

Run of the mill SNL promo’s but I don’t care. I can’t wait for Saturday night and for Louis C.K. to tear the house down yet again. We also learned that Sam Smith will be his musical guest. According to Wikipedia, Sam Smith is an old wooden ship that was used during the  Civil War era. Should be fantastic. Make sure to follow us on Twitter @averagenobodies as we’ll be tweeting witty observations during the show.

– Ryan

P.S. LINCOLN

Of Course There Is a Serial Urinator Terrorizing Women in Florida

muppet

(news4Jax)

Source Have you seen this man? If so, you’re trapped in one of two places: a world  created by  Jim Henson or (much worse) Florida.

The Gainesville Police Department released the above composite drawing (or is  it a Muppets Most Wanted promotional image?) of a man suspected of  urinating on women near the University of Florida campus. Says News4Jax:

In late February and early March, four incidents were reported of a man who  was approaching women from behind and urinating on them. Since the media  coverage of those reports, at least three more victims have come forward to  report the same crime, according to police.

One of the victims was able to give enough information to help police create  a sketch of the urinator.

Police say the “urinating bandit” has been described as “between the ages of  25 and 30, about 6 feet tall with a medium to chunky build.” He was last seen  wearing a hooded sweatshirt and jeans.

 

If I’m being honest right now I’m a little scared. Either the police sketch artist in Gainesville is 8 years old or there is a man who looks like that peeing on women in Florida. I’m also not sure which scenario is worse for the people of Gainesville. How are you going to catch this guy when THAT is the sketch you’re looking for? Oh and he’s in his late 20’s, 6 feet tall, average weight and wears a sweatshirt and jeans? That narrows it down to every guy in the world. For a state that see’s so much crazy shit, you’d think they’d have come up with a better nickname. The “urinating bandit” is too cliché. Also doesn’t a bandit imply he’s stealing something? Seems to me this guy just has poor decision making skills. Don’t make him out to be some type of monster. He’s just an ordinary Floridian going about his day, pee peeing on whatever he wants to.

– Ryan

Goodbye Justin Bieber

Source – Justin Bieber is in trouble – again.

The pop star was arrested early Thursday for drag racing and DUI in Miami Beach, police confirmed on Twitter. Police say R&B artist Khalil was also arrested.

Bieber was charged with resisting arrest and had consumed alcohol and marijuna, reports AP.

Bieber, 19, was in a rented yellow Lamborghini.

image

A while ago I wrote about the slow and steady downfall that Justin Bieber was going through. Now before I get started here, I want it to be clear that I could care less if this guy fails. He’s 19 and he’s already made more money than me, slept with more girls and is one of the most recognizable people on the planet. I’m just here to call a spade a spade. You want to know why Justin Bieber is going to fail? Because he lacks the one thing that every famous person had who fucked up and got their life back together: resiliency. He got discovered on YouTube by Usher, made a cute popsy song that attracted literally the easiest audience to attract (young girls) and got a boatload of fame and fortune thrown in his face. Now that the shit is hitting the fan, he wants his bodyguards and inner circle to make everything go away like it’s a bad dream. Unfortunately for him, it’s real life.

Do you ever wonder why so many child actors/musicians have fucked up lives? Because a 16, 17, 18, 19 year old shouldn’t be living in Los Angeles or Hollywood where the vices outnumber pretty much anything good or moral you’re trying to accomplish. That’s why it’s always great to see someone like Justin Timberlake, who got famous young (17 when NSync started taking off), but kept his head above water and turned into an other worldly talent. DUI’s are becoming so common for celebrities that Bieber may get off the hook for this one, go back to making his music for teenage girls, and have a good career. But if I were a betting man, I’d say this is just the beginning of something bad.

Back to the resiliency angle. Does Justin Bieber strike you as someone who deals with animosity well? The same kid who had his bodyguards carry him up the Great Wall of China doesn’t seem like he’s taking the backlash in stride. Again, his bread and butter IS MAKING SONGS FOR TEENAGE GIRLS. Even at the peak of his fame, no one took this guy seriously. So now that everything is going wrong, who does he lean on to get his shit right? If I had cameras in my face 24/7 while websites like TMZ were dissecting my every move, I’d probably lose my mind too. In a way, its kind of sad to see a 19 year old with the world by the balls just be such an idiot and an asshole. Between the constant bad press, on and off retirement and the general dismay people my age or older have for him, it’s going to be a long road back to the top. Like I said, I’m not rooting for him to fail, but at this point, I don’t see any other outcome.

– Ryan

Kate McKinnon Might Actually Be Justin Bieber

That’s as good a Justin Bieber impression as you’ll ever see. Cherry on the ice cream was the fact that she actually looked like Bieber. There’s talent, and then there’s Kate McKinnon. FYI, the entire Drake hosted episode of SNL was awesome. Drake just got his newest and most deranged fan.

– Ryan

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