Blog Archives

Eddie Lacy Made An Extra $55,000 Today For Being Under 250 Pounds

What a time to be alive. I was trying to think of something to compare this to in the real world but I’m drawing a blank. I understand that there’s a difference between being a professional athlete and doing literally anything else, but a 250 pound weight clause is basically giving away money. If this was a 225 pound clause or 215 maybe I’d give Lacy some credit, but the guy is 5 foot 11 inches tall. Asking him to not be a 250 pound plus ball of dough shouldn’t be too difficult, especially when you’re dangling $55K in front of his face. If I’m Eddie Lacy I’m using this bonus and going on an eating spree the likes this world has ever seen. Do your thing, Eddie. You deserve it?

-Ryan

Bruce Irvin Has An Interesting Sense Of Humor #AprilFools

Hahaha. April Fools! Silly Twitter believing an NFL player got a DUI! What NFL player has ever been in trouble with law before? Honestly the only thing funnier than this would have been a domestic violence joke. The Seahawks should have got together as a team and each picked a crime to “commit” so they could fool everyone. Russell Wilson robs a liquor store, Jimmy Graham assaults an elderly man, Marshawn Lynch kills a guy; the possibilities are literally endless. I’m glad the NFL is cracking down on the behavior of it’s players, because this situation clearly shows how seriously they take the punishments for DUI’s and things of that sort.

– Ryan

H/T NY Daily News

TNW – The Bachelor is Entering NFL Free Agency

NFL Free Agency

You can’t fool us, Andy. This isn’t a real trade, although I wouldn’t be surprised. The Saints are giving away players like Oprah used to give away cars.

That’s the downside of naps: FOMO. Fear of missing out is real, and you just missed some blockbuster trades. I hope the nap was worth it.

Why are so many people taking naps on a Tuesday afternoon? Is there a secret Nap Club I don’t know about it? If there is, I’m going to be upset.

– Ryan

 The Bachelor

#Broad4lyfe is the only hashtag the Bachelor TV show should use from now on. That’s pure genius. Also, if you don’t call your significant other your “Broad 4 Lyfe” when you propose then I don’t want to know you.

I have to admit, I wasn’t even sure that was a real website until I clicked on it. You’re dad is on to something…nobody tell ABC though…

More like Flipper or Mr. Limpet?

The Seattle Seahawks Beat The Green Bay Packers In Overtime To Advance To The Super Bowl In One Of The Craziest Games You’ll Ever See

I don’t have much analysis to provide here, but just know that if you missed the last 6 minutes of this game, you missed one of the most improbable comebacks in sports history. Seattle was down 12 with 5 minutes left and Green Bay had the ball after Russell Wilson threw his fourth interception of the day. That Green Bay was only up 12 with 5 minutes left when the opposing quarterback had thrown 4 picks (and they fumbled a kickoff) is still baffling, but we’ll save that story for another day. The rest of the game belonged to the Seahawks. They scored twice in the final 3 minutes, including a Hail Mary two point conversion that I still don’t believe I saw. Rodgers marched Green Bay down the field to set up a game tying field goal, but once Seattle won the coin toss in overtime, you knew it was over. If you’re a Green Bay fan, this is as heartbreaking as it gets. If you’re a Seattle fan, this might be the peak of the season. They have two weeks, but they’re going into the Super Bowl with key injuries on the defensive side against an offense that just cannot be stopped. To put into perspective how much this victory meant to Seattle, look at Russell Wilson’s interview after he won last year’s Super Bowl, starting at the 1:20 mark*:

Now watch Wilson’s interview after yesterdays victory:

That is someone who is physically and emotionally drained. Wilson and the rest of his teammates used everything they had to win that football game, and who knows what’s left in the tank for the Super Bowl. What I do know is that we saw one of the greatest games in sports history yesterday, and if the Super Bowl is half as good, we’ll all be in for a treat.

– Ryan

*Thanks to Grantland for pointing out the difference in the interviews.

The Bird Takeover Has Begun: Seattle Seahawk’s Hawk Mascot Tries to Maul Fan

So maybe the hawk didn’t try to maul the fan, but this is how it starts: the hawk “accidentally” missed it’s handler and headed straight for the crowd. The most disturbing thing about this whole situation is that I underestimated how smart these birds really are. Instead of attacking the fan in the crowd, it just kind of messed around with him. Why? So we wouldn’t perceive this blatant miscarriage of justice as a threat. If the hawk started attacking this fan then we’d all get suspicious. But since the hawk didn’t attack the fan everyone thinks this was an honest mistake. Well I’m not falling for it. The takeover has begun, and if you don’t think Pete Carroll had something to do with this you’re high.

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– Ryan

 

 

 

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