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Music Monday: Sam Smith – How Will I Know (Whitney Houston Cover)

Sam Smith hopped onto my radar earlier this year when he was the musical guest for Louis C.K.’s second stint as host of SNL, especially with his live version of ‘Stay With Me’. Now he’s crossing over into the cover song game, and if this version of ‘How Will I Know’ is any indication, he’ll be fantastic.

– Ryan

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My Favorite Sketch From Andy Samberg’s SNL: The Return of the Vogelcheck’s

Andy Samberg returned to his roots Saturday night to host the season finale of SNL, and he brought just about every old cast member he ever performed with along for the ride. Seth Meyers, Bill Hader, Maya Rudolph, Kristen Wiig, Fred Armisen and everybody’s favorite host, Paul Rudd. The show as a whole was very good, including two weirdly funny digital shorts and a killer Weekend Update. It’s tough to rank any of those sketches over the return of America’s First family of kissing: The Vogelcheck’s. This was one of my favorite recurring sketches with the old cast, and by far the most awkward to watch, which somehow makes it more charming. The whole crew joined Samberg for this sketch, including Fred Armisen and Kristen Wiig as Mr. and Mrs. Vogelcheck, and Bill Hader and Paul Rudd as his over affectionate older brothers. Even Kate McKinnon got in on the fun, playing grandma Vogelcheck. SNL used this sketch to address the over publicized Michael Sam kiss on ESPN. Enjoy.

– Ryan

Twitter News Weekly – Michael Sam, Pierre the Pelican, Shia Gone Crazy

New episode every Friday

-The Average Nobodies

Dale Hansen Just Mic Dropped the Entire World

World, Dale Hansen; Dale Hansen, world. This is as good a two minute take on any subject as you’ll ever see. And Dale Hansen couldn’t be more right. If NFL teams are so worried about the “controversy” a gay man will bring maybe they should stop drafting every version of an asshole the world ever created. Suck it, NFL.

– Ryan

Thanks to Timmy for the tip.

Cuddle Up To Me is Apparently a Real Company Where People Pay a Stranger to Cuddle With Them

(Source) “Looking for a little extra affection? Meet Sam Hess, a 29-year-old cuddle professional who makes a living by selling snuggles to those in need. Hess is part of a new breed of business people who believe that touch, no matter who it comes from, is the key to a happy life. She hatched the idea after watching a YouTube experiment in which two men offered free or paid hugs to people on the street. “People paid for hugs more than they took the free ones, and I realized that there’s real value in affection,” Hess tells Yahoo Shine. “My friends and boyfriend were a little wary at first, but once they realized I was serious about it, they were supportive.” Hess’s Portland, Oregon based company, called Cuddle Up To Me, offers two basic packages: A 30-minute session for $35 and a 60-minute session for $60 (She charges a $1 per minute in overtime), during which Hess and her client might hold hands, cuddle up on the couch, or spoon to the tune of her “cuddle playlist,” which includes classic music and hits by Phil Collins and Jack Johnson. There are also prepaid weekly sessions and a flat rate for overnight stays. However, before she does business, Hess conducts a free 45-minute meet-and-greet in a public place such as a coffee shop, to assess the intentions of potential clients. “I need to know where a person is coming from so I know what I’m walking into,” she explains.  

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This is sad. Not “someones dying” sad, but the “he’s sitting all by myself at the restaurant” type of sad. Who’s paying someone $60 an hour to cuddle with them? Splurge and pay the extra $100 for a prostitute like a normal person. I don’t care how many write ups Sam gets Yahoo or any other website to do. This is weird and anyone who thinks otherwise is weird. Buy a teddy bear. Go out in society and meet people. Basically do anything but pay a stranger to come cuddle with you.

– Ryan

P.S. The only thing I’m on board with is the choice of Phil Collins for this girl’s cuddle playlist. I’d love to cuddle to Phil’s angelic voice. Again, just not with a stranger.

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