Blog Archives
Aaron Hernandez Is Officially A Murderer
And there it is for those who missed it: Aaron Hernandez found guilty of first-degree murder. — Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) April 15, 2015
There you have it. Ex football player and now official murderer Aaron Hernandez is going to jail forever. It’s kind of crazy to think someone who literally had it all could end up being a murderer/possible serial killer, but I guess anything is possible in the NFL. A few years ago he was signing a $40 million contract and now he’s going to jail for first degree murder. The NFL is messed up and the only real difference between Hernandez and NFL poster boy Ray Lewis is shit luck and better friends I suppose. And if you’re wondering why I dropped the ‘possible serial killer line in the previous sentence…
And Aaron Hernandez still faces trial for alleged murders of Daniel de Abreu and Safiro Furtado in July 2012. — Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) April 15, 2015
– Ryan
JJ Watt And His 61 Inch Vertical Box Jump Are Ready To Murder Opposing Offenses
You know who I wouldn’t want to be starting in September? Any offensive player that has to go against the Texans. JJ Watt is legitimately terrifying, and that was before I saw the video above where he shows off his 61 inch vertical box jump. That’s over 5 feet. Anyone that can jump feet in the air from a standing position should not be allowed to hit other people. That’s beyond freak of nature status; that’s just inhuman. I can honestly I’d have trouble crawling up that high, never mind trying to jump from a standing position. What’s the point of trying to block JJ Watt if you’re an offensive lineman that watches this video? Even if you out muscle him, he now has the ability to JUMP OVER YOU. If Clowney stays healthy, the Texans front line D of Watt, Clowney and Wilfork are going wreak havoc on the NFL this year.
– Ryan
The Patriots Don’t Have To Worry About Gronk Suffering A Concussion Because He Apparently Doesn’t Have A Brain
Gronk – During the interview with Jim Rome on Jim Rome on Showtime in which Rob Gronkowski said he’d want a wife who cooked and cleaned, he also spiked a piñata, talked about his party bus … and said he’d rather get a concussion than blow out his knee. His logic was a little less than sound.
“Uh, so if we’re sitting here and I had choose would I want a concussion right now or my knee blown out, I’m going to say a concussion. Why would I want to sit there for eight months and not do anything, when with a concussion I’ll just wake up and I’ll be ready to go again.
Gronk isn’t worried about not remembering things later in life because “that happens all the time. I don’t even know how I got to my hotel last night.”
No one would ever accuse Gronkowski of being a philosopher, but it seems crazy to me that he would equate browning out from having too many drinks to CTE, the condition that has afflicted many former football players.

Rob Gronkowski hit the lottery when he was born. I’m not even talking about being built like a house either. If he wasn’t a professional football player, I can’t imagine he’d be alive right now. He’s so stupid it almost defies logic. You also have to blame Jim Rome a little bit here too. What did you think the world scholar Gronk was going to say to that question. He’s already blown out his knee, and he apparently doesn’t have a brain, or know how concussions work, so he’ll obviously take a concussion. The Pats already won one Super Bowl with him, so I guess they’re happy, but I can’t imagine he lasts more than a few years in the league. For every workout he does he seems to do double the damage to his body with his current lifestyle, but I guess the one he’s got going for him is that he can’t get a concussion. You’d need an actual brain for that. Maybe stop giving him a live microphone and asking him to talk about the very real issue of CTE? Give him a shiny object to hold onto and spike into the ground and call it a day.
– Ryan
Bruce Irvin Has An Interesting Sense Of Humor #AprilFools
Before this hits the media I just wanna apologize to my fans and the @Seahawks organization once again. I made a terrible decision b driving
— Bruce Irvin (@BIrvin_WVU11) April 1, 2015
After I had a few drinks. I will do everything to get ur trust back and will become a better person after this.
— Bruce Irvin (@BIrvin_WVU11) April 1, 2015
How many of yall thought I was serious ?! Haha April fools!!!
— Bruce Irvin (@BIrvin_WVU11) April 1, 2015
Hahaha. April Fools! Silly Twitter believing an NFL player got a DUI! What NFL player has ever been in trouble with law before? Honestly the only thing funnier than this would have been a domestic violence joke. The Seahawks should have got together as a team and each picked a crime to “commit” so they could fool everyone. Russell Wilson robs a liquor store, Jimmy Graham assaults an elderly man, Marshawn Lynch kills a guy; the possibilities are literally endless. I’m glad the NFL is cracking down on the behavior of it’s players, because this situation clearly shows how seriously they take the punishments for DUI’s and things of that sort.
– Ryan
H/T NY Daily News
The Indianapolis Colts Have Proposed a 9 Point Touchdown, Have Apparently Lost Their Minds
Indy – It’s bad enough the NFL adopted the two-point conversion years ago, but now the Colts have a proposal that could make touchdowns worth nine points.
It has even less of a chance of passing at next week’s league meetings in Phoenix than what has become Bill Belichick’s annual attempt to expand instant replay’s jurisdiction to every type of play. The Colts win this year’s award for dumbest proposal.
This is how it would work: If a team is successful converting the two-point conversion from the two-yard line, it would then be given the chance to add one more point with a long field-goal try. The line of scrimmage would be the 32-yard line, making for a 50-yard attempt. If the offensive team cashes in, it would be a bonanza. Add it up: Six points for the TD, two points for the conversion and one bonus point for the long extra point. Sounds like a great idea. A nine-point lead would mean it would be a one-possession game.
Clearly, there’s not much going on in Indianapolis, and the genius who came up with this in the Colts offices has way too much time on their hands.

Jim Irsay and the Colts have not be doing well since they got shellacked by the Patriots in the AFC Championship game. First it was deflate gate, which was just silly, and now they’re proposing 9 point touchdowns. What’s next, unlimited timeouts? You have to play the first and third quarters without cleats? Offense and defense switch positions for one drive a game? That last one actually isn’t that bad, but anything that comes out of Indy right now wouldn’t surprise me. They did make some nice offensive additions so far, but as far as the front office goes, they’re all insane. When Jim Irsay is in charge, that statement shouldn’t be very surprising.
– Ryan
24 Year Old San Francisco 49ers Linebacker Chris Borland Is Retiring From The NFL
NFL – San Francisco 49ers linebacker Chris Borland, one of the NFL’s top rookies last season, told “Outside the Lines” on Monday that he is retiring because of concerns about the long-term effects of repetitive head trauma.
Borland, 24, said he notified the 49ers on Friday. He said he made his decision after consulting with family members, concussion researchers, friends and current and former teammates, and studying what is known about the relationship between football and neurodegenerative disease.
“I just honestly want to do what’s best for my health,” Borland told “Outside the Lines.” “From what I’ve researched and what I’ve experienced, I don’t think it’s worth the risk.”
Borland becomes the most prominent NFL player to leave the game in his prime because of concerns about brain injuries. More than 70 former players have been diagnosed with progressive neurological disease following their deaths, and numerous studies have shown a connection between the repetitive head trauma associated with football, brain damage and issues such as depression and memory loss.
Baalke: “While unexpected, we certainly respect Chris’ decision… He was a consummate professional from day one.” http://t.co/oZCRQv1hef
— San Francisco 49ers (@49ers) March 17, 2015
As a 49ers fan, this a tough blow, especially considering the retirement of Patrick Willis and the impending retirement of Justin Smith. Other than that, this is a very smart move. As a soon to be 27 year old, I can relate to Chris Borland here, and that’s not something I can usually say about a fantastic football player. But the research is there. Concussions, and brain trauma in general, is a very real thing that is heightened when you play a contact sport like football. Chris Borland is a lot of things, and a football player with a bright future is definitely one of them, but most of all he’s a guy making an educated decision based on his own and other’s research. As Tyler Moorehead pointed out on Twitter, Borland has given reitrment some thought for awhile now:
It was evident even on Twitter that Chris Borland (@ChrisDec26) was doing his research over a month ago: pic.twitter.com/gO3JjCJAIU
— Tyler Moorehead (@TMoorehead627) March 17, 2015
There’s a reason Jake Locker retired at 26 and now Chris Borland is retiring at 24. It’s clear that my generation has a different mindset when it comes to football, and the one thing I hope people don’t take away from this is that people like Locker and Borland are less passionate than the generation of players before them. They care about their futures, and to be quite honest, if I played the same sport as a guy who shot himself in the chest so doctors could examine his brain, I’d be a little concerned about my future too. The older generation of football players, and people in general, used to say to ‘suck it up and play the game’, worry about the repercussions later. That is now a foolish and outdated point of view. Football is fun to watch, but it’s clear from the actions of Roger Goodell and those employed by him that the actual player’s safety is the least of their worries. For every rule change that prohibits hits to the head there’s something to make up for it, like having your players play on a Thursday after a Sunday and not giving them enough time to recover from such a grueling game. The same goes for the proposed 18 game schedule we hear every offseason; Roger Goodell and his owners care about money, plain and simple. I’m glad guys like Borland and Locker are realizing that and are taking themselves out of the game before it’s too late. Being known as a great football player isn’t worth your future anymore, and that’s a very good thing.
– Ryan
TNW – The Bachelor is Entering NFL Free Agency
NFL Free Agency
Saints have traded Drew Brees to the Toronto Argonauts in exchange for Phil Kessel and Jose Reyes in a rare NFL-CFL trade, per @NFLCanada
— Andy (@Fabio227) March 10, 2015
You can’t fool us, Andy. This isn’t a real trade, although I wouldn’t be surprised. The Saints are giving away players like Oprah used to give away cars.
Damn i missed a lot of nfl trades during that nap — THIS JUST IN: (@just__N_) March 10, 2015
That’s the downside of naps: FOMO. Fear of missing out is real, and you just missed some blockbuster trades. I hope the nap was worth it.
I TAKE ONE NAP .. AND THE NFL GOES NUCLEAR ?!!!!!
— فرحان (@IMSOJANJUA) March 10, 2015
Why are so many people taking naps on a Tuesday afternoon? Is there a secret Nap Club I don’t know about it? If there is, I’m going to be upset.
– Ryan
The Bachelor
Finally in a place in my life where I’m ready to hate myself/watch the idiot farmer bro pick his #broad4lyfe. #TheBachelor — Paul (@walkoffhbp) March 10, 2015
#Broad4lyfe is the only hashtag the Bachelor TV show should use from now on. That’s pure genius. Also, if you don’t call your significant other your “Broad 4 Lyfe” when you propose then I don’t want to know you.
talking to my dad about the bachelor me-“well cause he’s a farmer” dad-“why doesn’t he just go on http://t.co/xkfCQx1IdH”
— Jen (@jen_hallbach) March 11, 2015
I have to admit, I wasn’t even sure that was a real website until I clicked on it. You’re dad is on to something…nobody tell ABC though…
Chris on The Bachelor has a dolphin laugh 🐬 — Freddie Coudret (@Red_Dead_Fred) March 10, 2015
More like Flipper or Mr. Limpet?
The AFC East Trade Bonanza Continues As Brandon Marshall Is Reportedly Being Traded To The Jets
B-Marsh – The Chicago Bears have agreed to trade wide receiver Brandon Marshall to the New York Jets, a source told ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter.
A nine-year veteran and five-time Pro Bowler, Marshall fought through nagging leg injuries most of last season, and finished the year on the injured reserve due to fractured ribs and a punctured lung, and produced just 721 yards receiving. Prior to last season, Marshall racked up 1,000 yards receiving in seven consecutive seasons.
First Lesean McCoy gets traded to the Bills, and now it looks Brandon Marshall is heading to another AFC East team, the Jets. Honestly, it’s about time the AFC East teams started making some moves. The Patriots have dominated and embarrassed them for over a decade, and they just continue to take it. I guess the Patriots winning the division AGAIN and winning the Super Bowl AGAIN finally knocked some sense into the front offices of the Bills and the Jets. Neither team has a quarterback, but getting a top 5 running back and a top 10 receiver is a good start. Rex Ryan must have gone through a rollercoaster of emotions this past week. First, he snags Lesean McCoy, then he watches his former team and new rival get a monster wide receiver. If nothing else, the AFC East seems like it will be a lot of fun to watch in 2015. Also, Alshon Jeffrey fantasy alert. The guy is going to dominate this year.
– Ryan
