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Trailer Alert: The Mars Generation

Warning: This video may inspire you to leave Earth behind.

This video has all the elements to inspire me to want to call the red planet home. It’s got Bill Nye, Neil Tyson, The mohawk Nasa dude, our lord and savior Elon Musk and a slew of other awesome imagery that pumps me up and gives me a bit of a semi…if we’re being honest. My usual day-to-day on the internet is, for the most part, is full of misery. Political arguments, animals going extinct, natural disasters and general pessimism that I can’t stand anymore. But, something like this emerges and reminds me that there are still innovators among us; watching Space-X land the first reused rocket booster on a DRONE SHIP has assured me of that. I am excited to be a human for the first time in a little while.

The Mars Generation hits Netflix on May 5.

-Matt

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ICYMI: NASA’s Orion Rocket Performed “Flawlessly” This Morning, and I Watched it LIVE!

Look at the MOFO go! To infinity and beyond! Also, if you were wondering, it landed safely as well.

Let’s go to Mars!

-Matt

Insane Instagram Comments – NASA

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For those of you who don’t know, or who aren’t huge space nerds like me, NASA has planned to test launch its newest rocket, Orion, this morning. Due to some faulty valves (couldn’t even begin to explain that better) they move the test flight to tomorrow morning. After the moved launch NASA instagrammed his picture with an explanation. Comedy ensued in the comments….

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JosephZorzoli coming in HOT with the hijacking plan. Can’t knock the hustle though, If i had the resources and know-how to steal that rocket and take it to any planet it would have to be Mars. Being the first person to do anything is becoming rarer and rarer. This would be JosephZorzoli’s chance to make history…..and probably kill himself. But hey, at least he will have snacks!

-Matt

The Orion Spacecraft is Our Future in Space

Just so NASA knows, I am still 100% ready to start my astronaut training. Pick the day and time and i’m there.

-Matt

Chris Hadfield’s TED Talk is AMAZING.

For those of you who do not know who Chris Hadfield is, he is a Canadian astronaut who is now retired but spent time on the ISS. In this TED talk he talks about conquering your fears, living your dreams, and so much more. Give it a watch.

-Matt

Bill Nye and I Would Be Best Friends – Praising SpaceX

Last week while at the beach house, I was talking my friend’s ears off about SpaceX and all the good work they are doing, and then Bill Nye comes out with a video like this on Big Think. Coincidence? I don’t think so. How does that saying go? “Great minds think alike”?, or something like that. PS- Elon Musk is my personal hero. When he founded SpaceX in 2002 he understood the importance of keeping our eyes and minds pointed at the stars, and Bill Nye agrees. More space stuff! All the space stuff!

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-Matt

A NASA Funded Animal Researcher Admitted to Having Sex With a Male Dolphin Proving Once Again the 60’s Were Insane

Dolphin sexA female animal researcher has admitted to sex with a male dolphin during a 1960s NASA-funded experiment.

Margaret Howe Lovatt was stationed on the U.S. Virgin Islands as part of a NASA experiment to teach the intelligent mammals how to communicate.

She revealed in an upcoming BBC documentary that it was in 1963 when a house was flooded to turn it into a dolphinarium, allowing researchers to study the animals at close quarters, according to the Daily Mirror.

One of them, nicknamed Peter, was a sexually maturing adolescent.

“Peter liked to be … with me. He would rub himself on my knee, my foot or my hand and I allowed that,” she said.

“I wasn’t uncomfortable — as long as it wasn’t too rough. It was just easier to incorporate that and let it happen, it was very precious and very gentle, Peter was right there, he knew that I was right there.”

Lovatt claims the sex play became a regular part of her studies, adding, “It would just become part of what was going on, like an itch, just get rid of that scratch and we would be done and move on.”

The nature of their relationship caused a scandal and rumors grew about experiments of dolphins suffering drug abuse with LSD tests.

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No matter how chaotic or crazy we think the world we currently live in is, it has absolutely nothing on the 1960’s. Human/dolphin sex is just another example of that. To Margaret’s credit, at least she named the dolphin. This wasn’t just some casual, late night, “I had too much to drink” sex. This was sensual. This was the real thing. Peter and Margaret knew what each other and they came together in the name of love (pun intended). As a side note, if Margaret WASN’T on LSD when this happened then maybe she take the next few plays off. Can’t have dolphin perverts running around looking for fresh meat.

– Ryan

Matt Vieira, Supreme Ruler of The Planet Mars

Mars One is a non profit organization whose mission is to expand human life to other planets. Their CEO and President’s name is Bas Lansdorp and he is insane as the day is long, but I would follow him to the ends of the universe…literally.

The Mars One initiative aims to send humans to Mars…forever. A one-way ticket that will cement you in the history books and forever change your life. The mission will send two males and two females to mars in 2023. The project is an estimated 6 billion dollar undertaking, 3.5 more billions than Curiosity. If you ask me, thats a bargain. Spend the little extra and send some people, that won’t get stuck on rocks or run out of battery, up there. “But Matt!”, you scream from outside my window. “How will they ever pay for this!?” Application fees of course! You silly geese. Applications cost $38 dollars a piece, so that means they only need 157,894,737 people to file applications. Uh…What?? However, Bas Lansdorp does not seem concerned. In a recent interview with Bas (Can I call you Bas?) he said “We have gotten 10,000+ emails already.” Way to see the glass half full, Bas.

Speaking of Mr. optimistic, Bas also said in the same interview “There will be emergencies and deaths. We need to make sure that crew members can continue without those people….it is up to the people on Mars to decide what to do with their dead.” Nothing like putting a little faith and confidence in your crew. I can see the pep talk now……(dream sequence)….”So what we got here is a rocket, not sure if its going to launch or blow up on the pad. Oh, and also, people will die up there so you figure out what to do with the bodies. As far as medicine goes, we have none, we didn’t quite reach our fundraising goal. In a couple years, if this hasn’t folded, we might send more people, but don’t count on it. Oh yea and go fuck yourself.” Just a complete “shits gonna happen” type locker room speech. But like I said, this wouldn’t stop me. The only thing that would make me want to go more is if Bruce Willis was the captain of shuttle.

Personally, I am ready to send in my application and video. And If I do get selected, here is my plan. I get up there on the red rock and. I. Go. Rogue. Just causing a ruckus and claiming Mars for myself. Have you ever been King of an entire planet? No you haven’t, but I will. SUCKERS.

-MattyV

Here is the welcome video on their site. If this doesn’t get you hard for exploring the universe then I feel bad for you.

P.S. When asked if Bas would like to join this mission to Mars he responded, “I have a really nice girlfriend, and she doesn’t want to come with me, so I’m staying right here.” Strong move, Bas, chivalry isn’t dead after all.

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