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Apparently Rhode Island Is Stalker Central
“Taylor Swift has to deal with guys not loving her back pretty often, but this time around she’s got one guy who just won’t get out of her hair — and who’s straight up scary. The ‘Everything Has Changed’ singer reportedly has a full-blown stalker, and the perp was arrested after he tried passing her security guard a love letter while trespassing on her Rhode Island property. Swift, who’s dated men ranging from older (John Mayer) to barely legal (Conor Kennedy) has standards, and 55-year-old Joseph Bernatche didn’t meet them. The Portland, Maine man was arrested on July 27 for allegedly trespassing on Swift’s palatial property, something his lawyer denies. “We deny that Mr. Bernatche was ever on Ms. Swift’s property,” Bernatche’s attorney Michael J. Robinson told Radar Online. “The security guards have a job to do and I don’t blame them. They do what they think they have to do. In this case, I think they were just being overly zealous, overly cautious.” So what exactly happened? According to Robinson, not much. “Mr. Bernatche showed up and parked at the house next to Taylor Swift’s,” Robinson says. “He was carrying a note [with his phone number on it]. He signals to the security guard to come down and hands him the note. He says, ‘I’m not here to trespass, I’m just here to deliver this note. If you would kindly give this to Taylor Swift, that’s my sole purpose for being here.’” Right. Does that sound like any conversation you’ve ever heard? Robinson continued, “The security guard reads the note, gets the license plate, and my client walks away … [Bernatche] was driving away from Ms. Swift’s property when he was stopped and arrested by the Westerly Police.” Though Bernatche has a history of trespassing on Swift’s Rhode Island property, Robin asserts that proving such a case won’t be easy for the cops — so the likely disturbed man will may get off scott-free.” – Star Crush
This is why we can’t have nice things. Rhode Island’s beautiful beaches finally lure a celebrity in her prime and now every middle aged psychopath is trying to scare her away. I love how the lawyer is trying to play this off as a normal person move. Normal people don’t do this. They don’t get caught trespassing numerous times then park their car next door and try to deliver a note with their phone number on it. Also, normal people don’t look like this:
Until recently I was off the T-Swift bandwagon, but now that all these crazies are trying to abduct her, I think she needs me back. Hey Tay, I’m driving the bus again baby. I can be casual yet fierce, as shown by this picture of me and my long toothed friend.
Worry free times indeed.
– Ryan
P.S. If this song wasn’t playing as Joe was walking towards the security gate then I’ve lost all my faith in humanity
Miley Cyrus Has Ruined Tongues For Me Forever
Did I feel weird writing that title? Yes I did, but I can’t ignore my true feelings. I was a believer in Miley Cyrus. I defended her through her crazy hair stage and ignored the now apparent fact that she’s completely insane. Here is Miley’s performance from last nights VMAs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apL0BArCTz4&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Pretty weird performance, but I’m not going to stifle her bizarrely creative process. If someone wants to dry hump an oversized bear let them do it. The one thing I, and everyone else probably noticed, though. was that Miley stuck her tongue out. A lot.
Almost an awkward amount of times. Combine that with the fact that she was overly sweating and her hair was what my nightmares now consist of, and you have one guy who is officially off team Miley. I’ll never look at tongues the same way again. All I can think of is all the horrible places that tongue has been. The horror!
– Ryan
P.S. Hey Miley, this is how it’s done
Monsterblog Wednesday: Pandora Stations
Pandora makes the world go round. That is a scientific fact. Instead of wasting precious minutes, hours or days (!) on the wrong Pandora stations, let us give you ours. Proceed with caution.
Matt’s Picks
Internet radio has changed the way I listen to music. Instant playlists that will melt your heart or pump you up for a work out from hell is what Pandora is all about. Here are my picks for all around good listening
Summer Oldies Radio: Taking you back to the golden years without putting you to sleep. Put this on by the pool, or on a roof top in the city and you’re in for a good time.
Sample Track List: Van Morrison – Brown Eyed Girl • Frankie Valli & the 4 Seasons – Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You • Dion and the Belmont – The Wanderer.
Classic Rock Radio: Put away your polo shirt and bust out the old AC/DC cutoff. This playlist is sure to get your weekend started and put you in the mood for a road trip or a fist fight.
Sample Tack List: AC/DC – Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap • Grand Funk Railroad – Some Kind of Wonderful • Foreigner – Hot Blooded.
Reel Big Fish Radio: For all you ska fans out there, you know who you are, check out this playlist. The bouncy rhythm that the ska genre has to offer is bound to get anyone in the right mood! Feeling blue? Put on the Fish!
Sample Track List: Reel Big Fish – The New Version of You • Streetlight Manifesto – Sick and Sad • Less Than Jake – Liquor Store
-MattyV
Ryan’s Picks
Ben E. King Radio: Mr. King brings you back to the soul music of the 60s and 70s, mixed with some classic Doo Wop. I personally consider any day in which I hear “Stand By Me” a gigantic win.
Sample Track List: Ben. E King – There Goes My Baby • Johnny Maestro & The Crests – In The Still Of The Night • Dion – I Wonder Why
80s Cardio Radio: If you need to get pumped up, and we all do from time to time, then you put on 80s cardio. Nothing screams “we were all on cocaine” more than a synthesizer heavy 80s jam.
Sample Track List: Eurythmics – Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) • C+C Music Factory – Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now) • Michael Sembello – Maniac
Tommy Castro Radio: Castro isn’t as mainstream as some of these other stations, but he still gets the job done. He’s a mix of blues and rock, with a hint of Stevie Ray Vaughn. Listening to his guitar solos makes me want to dance, which is usually bad news for anyone within eyesight.
Sample Track List: Tommy Castro – Let’s Give Love A Try • Lil’ Ed & The Blues Imperials – You Just Weren’t There • Taj Mahal – Down Home Girl
– Ryan
Happy listening.
Prince Tweeted The Album Cover For His New Single And It’s Awesome
For those unaware, Prince officially joined Twitter a few weeks ago (@3rdeyegirl) and it basically turning the platform on it’s head. The guy legally changed his name to a symbol, so giving him 140 characters of free range is going to be fun to follow. Almost on cue, Prince tweeted out the following concerning his new single Breakfast Can Wait:
Game: Blouses http://t.co/3jShq2r9Ci http://t.co/3oEI8kQsKB http://t.co/G0uLp2mbJk pic.twitter.com/dNwDPifP8j
— PRINCE 3RDEYEGIRL (@3rdeyegirl) August 16, 2013
Dave Chappelle, dressed as Prince, serving pancakes. Straight out of a Charlie Murphy True Hollywood Story. It really doesn’t get much better than that. Now we can all go purify ourselves in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
– Ryan
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaKHR6oe52Q&feature=youtube_gdata_player
So Lady Gaga Has Been Wearing Clown Makeup All Week
“After Lady Gaga’s new song “Applause” was leaked, Gaga decided to take some action and stroll the streets of Los Angeles in the same makeup featured on the single’s cover art. While not too many people can get away with rainbow face paint (just look at poor Ryan Seacrest) on Lady Gaga, the make-up looks almost… normal. Where is the gigantic egg? Where is the dress made of meat?! Click on to see some of Gaga’s most, well, normal looks.” – Bustle
That’ll show ’em. Lesson here kids: when you wear clown makeup in public all week, we all lose.
– Ryan
P.S. It’s 2013. All that advertising and social media promoting is a major reason your a millionaire. If a song leaks, suck it up.
Childish Gambino – Clapping For The Wrong Reasons (Short Film)
“Featuring the likes of Chance The Rapper, Trinidad James, porn star Abella Anderson, Flying Lotus and Topanga (Danielle Fishel), we’re treated with another mysterious visual from Gambino. With a rumored project to be on the way, Donald lets loose this “Director’s Cut” of a whole bunch of different happenings. What’s this mysterious clip all about? I don’t have the answer, but one thing is for certain – Donald is a creator…” – Ootlyfe
Donald sure has been busy this summer. After announcing that he’ll be scaling down his role on the NBC comedy Community to focus on talks of creating his own show on FX, Glover a.k.a. Childish Gambino released this short film titled “Clapping For The Wrong Reasons”. It’s not entirely clear what the video is about, but it seems Glovers rapper alter ego may be releasing some new music very soon. While most of the visuals are cryptic, extended cameos by porn star Abella Anderson and Danielle Fishel (Topanga from Boy Meets World) make certain parts easy on the eyes. Glover is a rare two game player nowadays, and with all these rumored projects on the horizon, it seems the sky is truly the limit for him.
– Ryan
P.S. Give our friends at @ootlyfe a follow. Great blog on music and today’s urban culture
Donald Glover A.K.A Childish Gambino Creating New Series For FX
“Donald Glover has lined up his followup series to Community. The actor-comedian is set to write, executive produce and play the lead in a half-hour comedy, which has landed at FX for development. Tentatively entitled Atlanta, the comedy is set against the backdrop of the Atlanta music scene. Glover grew up in Atlanta and has an active music career as a hip-hop artist, stage name Childish Gambino. I hear several networks were interested in Atlanta but, in addition to the FX comedy brand, Glover also was attracted by the network’s willingness to accommodate his music touring schedule. Glover is free and clear to topline Atlanta as he is no longer a regular on Community and is set to appear in five of the 13 episodes of the cult NBC comedy’s upcoming fifth season. Last season, Glover was attached in second position to an NBC comedy project penned by Matt Hubbard. Glover, repped by CAA, The Schiff Co. and attorney Lev Ginsburg, started off as a writer on 30 Rock before landing the breakout role on Community as former high school quarterback-turned-air conditioning repair annex recruit Troy Barnes. He also has headlined two standup comedy specials.” – Deadline
While the details are still relatively unknown, this is a huge step for one of my favorite actors/musicians and someone very high on my “Please Host SNL List”. Glover knows comedy. Gambino knows music. What better mix than a comedic show about the Atlanta music scene? FX is a perfect network for a young mind such as Glover’s, as they’ve been known to give show runners creative control over their projects (just ask Louie C.K.). Glover’s series will join an already stacked lineup of original FX shows including Louie, Justified and Sons of Anarchy. One more reason to get excited for the future of TV.
– Ryan
Ryan’s Even Better Music Monday – Mumford & Sons – Hopeless Wanderer Parody
This is easily the funniest and most disturbing music video you’ll ever see. Anytime you can get Ed Helms, Jason Sudekis, Jason Bateman and Will Forte on the same stage, you get a certain kind of magic. The best part about this video is how similar it is to an actual Mumford & Sons music video (minus the making out). Speaking of the french kiss sequence, if it’s wrong to watch Jaaon Sudekis and Will Forte make out, then I don’t wanna be right.
– Ryan
P.S. Proof positive that Will Forte is so underrated it hurts. MacGruber has it.
P.P.S. Mumford & Sons actually hired Sudekis, Forte, Helms and Bateman to impersonate them. All kinds of awesome.
