Blog Archives
Trailer Alert – Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 Is Apparently A Real Thing
I was hoping this was some kind of nightmare but apparently there really is a Paul Blart 2 coming out. The first movie wasn’t bad but it had the unfortunate timing of coming out at the same time as the insanely underrated Observe & Report, which is basically the rated R version of Paul Blart. I’ll probably watch this movie at some point in my life, but if you pay money to go see this in theaters I will judge you until the end of time. Also, kind of a confusing title: Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2. Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.
– Ryan
The Avengers Are Fighting Robots Now In The New ‘Age Of Ultron’ Trailer
I’m sure this movie will be good, but I’m all superhero’d out at this point. It was fine when each superhero had their own movie, but is it really necessary to not only make an Iron Man, Thor & Captain America movie AND a bunch of Avenger movies? Don’t get me wrong, the trailer looks great, but if you spend a couple hundred million dollars on a movie and the trailer doesn’t look great you should probably stop making movies. I’m sure the heroes will be pushed to the brink of death before valiantly saving the day while the entire world is ruined, but I think it’s time we take a break and start making some original screenplays. The more movies with hundred million dollar budgets the worse Hollywood has become. Putting all that aside, I can’t wait to see Mark Ruffalo kick some robot ass.
– Ryan
Trailer Alert – ‘Get Hard’, Which Is Surprisingly Not A Pornographic Film
I hope whoever named this movie did it ironically, because you can’t name something ‘Get Hard’ and have it not be a porno. That just makes no sense. Anyway, Will Ferrell is a rich white man and Kevin Hart is a middle class black man (?) who finds Will Ferrell’s keys one day. Then Will Ferrell gets sentenced to 10 years in prison for fraud, and while he’s waiting to be sent there, he asks the only black person he knows to teach him what it’s like in prison. This movie is not racist at all. The trailer doesn’t look particularly funny, but I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt because it has Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart in it. Still kind of upset it isn’t a porno, though.
– Ryan
Hold On To Your Biscuits – Mad Max: Fury Road Has A New Trailer
In July, George Miller released the first trailer for the new Mad Max movie, and it blew me away. I’m a Tom Hardy homer, but being a fan of Tom Hardy had nothing to do with how awesome this movie looked. My initial love of the movie is now confirmed with this new action packed trailer. If you can find a flaw in this trailer then you’re a piece of shit and I hate you. Also, if you need anything more than “Tom Hardy takes over for Mel Gibson and saves the world while seeking revenge on scumbags” to see a movie then you’re trying too hard. This movie will be awesome. And I will see it. End scene.
– Ryan
Trailers You Should Watch NOW [Plus a Bonus Video]
Hey everyone, Matt here with some new trailers that you must watch right NOW. This weekend I am heading down the land of the crazies…you guessed it, Florida. While there I will be soaking up the sun, riding roller coasters, and watching the Buccaneers beat the piss out of those piece of shit Falcons! But, before I leave I wish to give you these trailers so you may begin to lust for upcoming silver screen adventures.
ENJOY!
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
So much walking: Part 6
Chappie
Slumdog meets District 9/Elysium
Minions
The Minions get an origins story. Do you think I could be casted in the sequel?
A Most Violent Year
Good Fellas meets American Hustle
Hardcore
The Guy from Elysium and District 9 Meets Call of Duty and they have a gang bang with a GoPro camera. Ok, I could seriously get into something like this. Unfortunately this is an Indie GoGo campaign and might not be finished.
The Gambler
Mark Wahlberg gambles a lot and bangs his student who happens to be the girl from 21 Jump Street. Yeah, i’m gonna see it.
And last but not least, I give you voiceover-less Darth Vader, with an english accent!
There Is Not a Force on Earth That Is Going To Stop Me From Seeing “The Wedding Ringer”
I love the movie Hitch. It has all the ingredients of a great movie: Will Smith, Kevin James, Eva Mendes, FRIENDSHIPS. The Wedding Ringer is basically Hitch but you sub out trying to find a girlfriend and you sub in trying to find a best man. You also sub in Josh Gad and Kevin Hart and the always funny movie trope of a rag tag band of misfits that almost always equals hilarity (Dodgeball, Bridesmaids). I will see this movie, and I will laugh. At this point, Kevin Hart could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves. The guy can’t miss.
– Ryan
Matt’s Definitive Guide to the Movies you Need to See this Year
Here is a list of the movies I am most excited for this year therefore you should be excited as well. These are in no specific order although, if we are being honest, you should know I am most excited to see “X-Men: Days of Future Past”. Like so excited my brain hurts. Like so excited I can’t sleep at night. Like so excited…ok, you get the point. Here it is.
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Guardians of the Galaxy
Neighbors (Already saw it and I would see it again. It’s that funny)
Godzilla
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