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Oh You Know Just Bill Murray Checking Tickets At A Minor League Baseball Game in St. Paul, Minnesota

Bill Murray just knows when people need some pick me ups. Oh the world is going to shit? Racism is rearing it’s ugly head? We’re bombing foreign countries again? Looks likes my services are needed. I don’t know if he lives in St. Paul but you couldn’t be more random if you tried. Just a one of a kind, wonderfully insane human being.

– Ryan

It’s Official: 5 Year Old Mayor Robert “Bobby” Tufts Won’t Be Re-Elected

PoliticsThe time has come for this pint-sized politician to bid adieu.

A 5-year-old boy’s adorable run as mayor of a tiny town in northern Minnesota has come to an end.

Robert (Bobby) Tufts lost his bid for a third consecutive term as mayor of Dorset on Sunday when 16-year-old Eric Mueller’s name was pulled from the ballot box at the annual Taste of Dorset festival.

“It was fun, but it’s time to pass on the vote,” he told The Associated Press.

The little guy was only 3 when he was first elected mayor in 2013 and his time in office will be fondly remembered by the 20-odd townsfolk in Dorset, about 150 miles northwest of Minneapolis.

He is known for declaring ice cream the top of the food pyramid and helping to raise money for Ronald McDonald House Charities of the Red River Valley in Fargo, N.D.

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Heartbreaking news. If declaring that ice cream is the top of the food pyramid can’t get you reelected in 2014  then I’m not exactly sure what will. What else do you want Bobby to do, Dorset? On a serious note, it’s pretty awesome that a three year old got to be mayor of anything. It’s also awesome that there are towns out there with 20 people in them. That has to be like a real life miniature version of Pleasantville. Everyone happy as a frog at a fly party. I picture Bobby riding around the streets in his Big Wheel, tipping his fedora to passers by like an absolute bad ass. Probably ate 15 popsicles a day. That’s the kind of America I want to live in. On the bright side Dorset, your mayor and my mayor of North Providence are probably the same size (he’s the tiny man behind the podium).

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– Ryan

If Rooting For Jeff Wagner To Become Mayor of Minneapolis Is Wrong Then I Don’t Wanna Be Right

Politicians these days are good for two things: sending dick pics and making false promises. Not Jeff Wagner. He just wants you to wake the fuck up. He is putting everyone who runs for public office on notice: if you’re not half naked and screaming obscenities in your mayoral commericials then you need to wake the fuck up and get with the times. If he doesn’t win in a landslide I’ve lost hope for this country.

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