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A Florida Man Impersonating a Cop Pulled Over an Actual Cop Because That’s What Floridians Do Now

Of CoursePolice say a man impersonating an officer face charges after signaling a real detective to pull over on a road in Florida.

St. Johns County authorities say 20-year-old Matthew Michael Lee McMahon activated a red and blue light Monday while driving behind an unmarked sheriff’s car. Detective Chance Anderson pulled over and was shocked to see an unknown face behind the wheel of the other car.

First Coast News (http://fcnews.tv/1rKLqww ) reports that during his more than 10 years of service the detective has arrested several police impersonators. But none had ever ordered him to stop his car.

McMahon is charged with impersonating an officer and unlawfully displaying blue lights.

He was released Tuesday after posting $5,500 in bail. It wasn’t clear whether he’s hired an attorney.

no no no

First off how many names does this guy need? Matthew Michael Lee McMahon. Take it easy buddy. Not only are you a disgrace to the McMahon family, but you’re clearly a moron. Rule number one of impersonating a cop is don’t pull over an actual cop. Nothing can ever go right when you pull over an actual cop. With that said, I am not one bit surprised that a man from Florida did this. It’s actually a mild news story coming out of Florida. In my opinion, we should forget jail in this case. Let Vince McMahon fly down to Florida and fight this guy in a Hell in a Cell match. I guarantee he’ll never impersonate a cop again.

– Ryan

Michael Jackson Performed as a Hologram on the Billboard Music Awards Last Night Because That’s Something That Happens Now

I enjoy Michael Jackson’s music. Personal allegations aside, he was an amazing singer/performer. He had a ton of number one hits and sold millions and millions of albums all while influencing a generation of musicians. To say having Michael Jackson resurrected as a hologram for a performance last night was unnecessary would be the understatement of the century. I thought the same thing about Tupac at Coachella and my stance isn’t changing. Not only is it haunting, but I watched both Tupac and MJ’s hologram performances and both crowds seem equally confused and horrified. It comes off weird to the live crowd and it’s really eerie watching it on TV. The only hologram I’m interested in is resurrecting Marvin Gaye to sing every national anthem at every sporting until the end of time. Until then, let’s stick to human beings singing and dancing.

– Ryan

My Favorite Sketch From Andy Samberg’s SNL: The Return of the Vogelcheck’s

Andy Samberg returned to his roots Saturday night to host the season finale of SNL, and he brought just about every old cast member he ever performed with along for the ride. Seth Meyers, Bill Hader, Maya Rudolph, Kristen Wiig, Fred Armisen and everybody’s favorite host, Paul Rudd. The show as a whole was very good, including two weirdly funny digital shorts and a killer Weekend Update. It’s tough to rank any of those sketches over the return of America’s First family of kissing: The Vogelcheck’s. This was one of my favorite recurring sketches with the old cast, and by far the most awkward to watch, which somehow makes it more charming. The whole crew joined Samberg for this sketch, including Fred Armisen and Kristen Wiig as Mr. and Mrs. Vogelcheck, and Bill Hader and Paul Rudd as his over affectionate older brothers. Even Kate McKinnon got in on the fun, playing grandma Vogelcheck. SNL used this sketch to address the over publicized Michael Sam kiss on ESPN. Enjoy.

– Ryan

Adam Silver Missed The Boat By Not Having Donald Sterling Attend Michael Scott’s Diversity Day Training

A lifetime ban and a $2.5M fine might be OK with some people but not for me. Donald Sterling might not own an NBA team anymore but we’re ignoring the root of the problem: he’s an admitted, proud racist. Fining him pocket change and banning him from the sport in which 80% of the players are people he hates probably isn’t going to change his views, but sending him to Diversity Day training with Michael Scott will. It’s the ultimate cure all for racists of all kinds. I really hope Adam Silver adds a diversity day provision into this ruling. Donald Sterling needs it. America needs it. I need it.

– Ryan

Michael Pineda Might Be the Dumbest Athlete of All Time

Source – New York Yankees starting pitcher Michael Pineda was ejected from Wednesday night’s game with the Boston Red Sox in the second inning for having a foreign substance on his neck that he was applying to the baseball.

In a bizarre sequel to an April 10 game between the Yankees and Red Sox, in which Pineda was suspected of having pine tar on the palm of his pitching hand, Red Sox manager John Farrell asked home plate umpire Gerry Davis to check Pineda.

After a mound conference in which Davis checked Pineda’s hand, the ball, and finally, the right side of his neck, Pineda was ejected from the game. At the time, Pineda had a 1-2 count onGrady Sizemore. He was replaced by David Phelps, who completed the strike out.

I don’t want to kick a guy when he’s down but how dumb can one person be? I thought the  guy with “murder” tattooed on his neck was dumb, but Michael Pineda might take the cake here. The Red Sox were obviously skeptical of him using pine tar to get a better grip on the ball the last time they played two weeks ago, so what does he do?

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He puts a shit ton of pine tar on his neck. That’s as obvious as it gets. If people really think John Farrell did something wrong here then they need to get their head examined. He let it go in Yankee Stadium. He even let it go during the first inning tonight. But if Pineda is going to be an asshole about it then he’s going to get thrown out of the game. And for any Yankee fans chirping, we were SHELLING Pineda over the first inning and two thirds. You should count yourself lucky we took him out of the game for you. With the most recent incident now behind him, I fully expect Pineda to go to the mound with a jar labeled “pine tar” for his next start.

– Ryan

 

Dale Hansen Just Mic Dropped the Entire World

World, Dale Hansen; Dale Hansen, world. This is as good a two minute take on any subject as you’ll ever see. And Dale Hansen couldn’t be more right. If NFL teams are so worried about the “controversy” a gay man will bring maybe they should stop drafting every version of an asshole the world ever created. Suck it, NFL.

– Ryan

Thanks to Timmy for the tip.

In Non Royal Rumble News, SNL’s ‘Her’ Parody Was Bizarre and Great

Whether its Wes Anderson or now Spike Jonze, SNL has been on it’s game with movie trailer spoofs this year. ‘Me’ was scary similar to the ‘Her’ trailer, about an complex introvert who falls in love with his home operating system. I’d probably watch ‘Me’ if it ever became a feature film, as long as the testicle kiss part was cut from the script. There’s also a great cameo at the end that was the icing on the cake. You go Jonah Hill. Go on with your bad self.

– Ryan

Is Space Jam the Most Universally Loved Movie Of All Time?

I watched Space Jam the other day for the time in a LONG time. Space Jam is the kind of move you can pull out in any situation and it satisfies the crowd. Old people. Young people. Men. Women. If you don’t like Space Jam there’s a solid chance you’re an asshole. Twitter is full of assholes, so I figured I’d be able to find someone who hates Space Jam.

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