These things are probably the least embarrassing things my friends and I do when impersonating our favorite wrestlers. Have you ever been told that you cannot wrestle in a bar before? No? Well, then you have no idea what it’s like.
No easy buckets, guys. Just because you won the 100th Rose Bowl it doesn’t mean you can just pour the gatorade on your coach. You’re going to have to wake up pretty damn early in the morning if you want to get the jump on Coach Mike D. There is a reason why the nickname “Slippery Mike D” exists.
As part of a month-long campaign to raise aware of men’s health issues, Lauer and Roker will have prostate exams on-camera during the show.
The procedure involves a manual digital examination of the prostate gland to determine whether its size and shape are normal.
It is often part of routine physical checkups for men, though some elect to bypass it because of the discomfort.”
Is this really necessary? I understand your raising awareness for prostate cancer but there has to be other ways of doing it. I don’t wanna see anyone get a prostate exam, especially Matt Lauer and Al Roker. Also, this is the fall of Matt Lauer. Every great American has a rise and fall. He climbed to the top of the ladder at the Today Show, and now the only place he can go is down. First he dresses as Pamela Anderson, now he’s getting his prostate checked on live television. I shutter to think what’s next.
If we ever make it big, our first purchase is a horse. A lot of rich people have fancy cars, or mansions with moats, or luxurious yachts, but only the truly elite own horses. With great power comes great responsibility, and with great responsibility comes naming your horse. We have to imagine there is nothing worse than watching your stallion cross the finish line with the entire crowd laughing at you because you picked a shitty name. The real winners in horse racing are those brave men and women who dare to be bold when choosing their horses name.
It was my childhood nickname (because apparently I reminded my parents of a black man with a speech impediment who ran like a white boy with leg braces) and I’ve embraced it ever since. Bubba Gump just so happens to roll off the tongue like a fine wine, and announcers better get used to saying it, because Bubba Gump does two things well: shrimpin’ and winning horse races.
Something that I have believed in since I was a child was that human names make the best animal names. Take my hypothetical horse, Kevin, for example. Pretty decent human name, but dynamite horse name! Let’s look at others named Kevin: Kevin Costner, Kevin Bacon, Kevin Spacey, Kevin Durant. Do I need to say more? Kevin will steal the Triple Crown and your heart, with ease.
It’s that time of the week again! Here are my picks.
Howard Stern (The King of All Media)
Is anyone excited that Jake Peavy is going to the Red Sox? I don’t know who Jake Peavy is – I just wanted to sound manly.
— Howard Stern (@HowardStern) August 1, 2013
— Isa Adney (@IsaAdney) August 1, 2013
Will Sasso (Vine and Twitter funny man, orignally of MADtv)
Arnold Schwarzenegger Driving Pt. 25 https://t.co/GVApu3m3qR
— Will Sasso (@WillSasso) July 30, 2013