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Trailer Alert: Suburbicon

What do you get when you combine a film written by the Coen brothers, directed by George Clooney and starring Matt Damon as a classic 1950’s all American white picket fence husband/father who’s actually indebted to the mob? The answer is Suburbicon, which just released it’s first trailer. It’s literally a mash up of a lot of things I love in movies: the Coen brothers are the masters of the dark comedy; Matt Damon is routinely fantastic in everything he’s in, and judging by this trailer that includes an in over his head father fending off the mob in Pleasantville USA; George Clooney is a beautiful, perfect man.

Clooney’s been around the Coen brothers before ( O Brother Where Art Thou, Burn After Reading, Hail, Caesar) and the trailer for Suburbicon nails that classic Coen brothers mood. On the surface everything looks peachy keen, but underneath that surface there is violence, bloodshed and ugliness. The mix of darkness and comedy is another Coen brother staple, and Matt Damon not only gets in a few one liners, but the closing scene of the trailer shows him riding away from an explosion on a tricycle. Give me all of this right now. Suburbicon opens October 27th.



George Clooney Just Sold His Casamigos Tequila Company For 1 BILLION Dollars

George Clooney is selling his tequila company Casamigos to Diageo for as much as $1 billion, the company said Wednesday.

“If you asked us four years ago if we had a billion dollar company, I don’t think we would have said yes,” Clooney told CNBC via email. “This reflects Diageo’s belief in our company and our belief in Diageo. But we’re not going anywhere. We’ll still be very much a part of Casamigos. Starting with a shot tonight. Maybe two.”

Diageo said it will initially pay $700 million, with the potential for another $300 million based on the tequila’s performance over 10 years. The transaction is expected to close during the second half of 2017.

Diageo doesn’t expect the deal to add to its earnings until its fourth year. In the first three years, the brand will not have any impact on earnings

Clooney and co-owners Rande Gerber and Michael Meldman are expected to stay with the company after its acquisition. – CNBC

Classic Clooney

It’s no secret that I’m a big guy Clooney fan. I’ve written about him an uncomfortable amount of times on the blog. I blogged when he started his tequila company (luckily I did not get addicted to tequila). I blogged when he got married. Usually I just found a reason to write an article about him because he’s a such a cool mother fucker. It turns out in addition to being cool, he’s also an extremely smart businessman, because he just sold his Casamigos tequila company for what could amount to $1 billion. I understand  power of name value, but name value alone doesn’t net you a billion dollar deal. In classic Clooney fashion, he celebrated with a shot (or two) but will stay with the company and help it continue to thrive. Check back here in 2020 when Clooney sells his tequila to the owner of the moon for a trillion dollars.


Trailer Alert – Money Monster

In the taut and tense thriller Money Monster, Lee Gates (George Clooney) is a bombastic TV personality whose popular financial network show has made him the money wiz of Wall Street. But after he hawks a high tech stock that mysteriously crashes, an irate investor (Jack O’Connell) takes Gates, his crew, and his ace producer Patty Fenn (Julia Roberts) hostage live on air. Unfolding in real time, Gates and Fenn must find a way to keep themselves alive while simultaneously uncovering the truth behind a tangle of big money lies. – IMDB

This movie had me at ‘Clooney’, but the trailer actually looks pretty good. In a way I’m all set with another ‘the government is horrible and ruins everything’ movie, but since the government is horrible and continues to ruin everything, I guess I’ll have to get used to movies like this. I’d also be lying if I said I wasn’t all in on Clooney being a ‘bombastic TV personality’ who uncovers a bunch of lies and starts kicking ass. Throw in trailer cameos from Gustavo Fring and Jimmy McNulty and you’ve got the rarely used Average Nobodies Seal of Approval:



Trailer Alert: ‘Hail, Caesar!’ Is Probably Going To Be Your New Favorite Movie

A Coen Brothers film feels comparable to a Tarantino or a Wes Anderson film in that you know what you’re watching is unlike anything else you’ve ever experienced. Once you get beyond the cast (Clooney, Brolin, Johansson, McDormand, Tatum, Swinton, Hill, Fiennes, etc.) you have a visually beautiful film that seems like it’s just going to be a whole bunch of fun. Back to that cast, though. What a murderers row of actors and actresses they got for this film. I’ll see anything with Clooney in it, but to put him together with Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill, Josh Brolin and Ralph Fiennes, Frances McDormand and Scarlett Johansson is downright silly. The movie doesn’t come out until February 2016, so hopefully this is the first of what are many more trailers to come.


Monster Blog Wednesay: The 3 People You’d Pick to Stay on Earth During The Rapture

We’re in full Leftovers mode after Sunday’s premiere, so naturally this week’s monster blog has to do with The Rapture. While that might not be what’s happening on the show, for the sake of this monster blog, we’ll say it is. Naturally family and friends are excluded here, because if you don’t pick your family and friends to stay behind during The Rapture maybe you should stop reading this and lay down for awhile. Actors, actresses, musicians, athletes, celebrity chefs!? Here are our picks:

  1. George Clooney


I’d probably pick Clooney over certain friends and family members, but that’s neither here nor there. I need Clooney on this Earth. If he goes, I go. If The Rapture is going to ravage this planet, I’m going to need my best friend by my side. Together (along with my two other picks), we’ll take over the world, and Clooney will eventually take claim his rightful throne as King of the World.

2.   Giada De Laurentiis


A man’s gotta eat during The Rapture, and while I can confidently say Giada and Clooney are going to shack up, at least my best friend will be happy and I’ll have some good eats. I don’t really know much about Giada beyond that’s she smoking hot and she hosts a cooking show so she probably has some decent culinary skills. Two for two in my book.

3.   Rihanna


I can’t survive without music, and maybe while Giada is busy with Clooney, me and Rihanna could get to know each other. Or she goes with Clooney too, which seems like the more likely scenario. Either way, I’d like to keep Rihanna around. There’s definitely something primal about her that makes me want her by my side during some kind of world catastrophe. She doesn’t fuck around. Always has her business/sex face on, which I think will really come in handy down the line. Party in the front, party in the back.

– Ryan

1. Bear Grylls


People start disappearing who you gonna call? Bear fucking Grylls, that’s who. During rapture time i’m sure the world will be in chasm, that’s why me and my group of three will be taking to the forest. Bear Grylls will come in handy there.

2. Louie CK

louis-ckWhat’s the point of surviving rapture if you can’t laugh about it? Louie would provide some much needed comedy relief as well as someone to talk to about tv show and film production. Hey, maybe we start our own post-apcalypse tv show. We could call it Louie….& Matt. I see this going somewhere.

3. Kate Beckinsale


Do I really need to explain this one? Just insert nasty thoughts.



George Clooney Has His Own Tequilla And Now I’m Addicted To Tequilla

Clooney getting into the spirits game. I love it. I was already borderline hooked on tequilla and now that the love of my life has thrown his hat into the race I plan on only drinking tequilla for the rest of my natural born days. I love the showmanship in the commercial as well. Anything can happen when you drink Casamigos. With my luck, I’d end up with Cindy Crawford or Stacey Keibler. Give me Clooney!

– Ryan

P.S. The other guy in that commercial is Clooney’s partner in the tequilla game, Randy Gerber, who is actually married to Cindy Crawford. What a skinny dipping party that would be.

Ryan & George: Best Friends Forever

“Buzz is bubbling up that George Clooney, 52, is single again. Clooney, who has been dating Stacy Keibler, 33,  for the past two years, have apparently called it quits. According to RadarOnline, the two were last seen together in public on March 16 in Germany. This past holiday weekend, Clooney was spotted at his Lake Como estate in Italy without her on July 4th. And Keibler posted a photo of herself in Malibu on July 3. She’s is busy working on her new Lifetime TV show, Supermarket Superstar, premiering July 22. He’s working on the film, Monuments Men. People mag reports that it was Stacy’s doing because she “wants to have children and a family someday,” a source says.  No official word from either camp.” – USA Today

So you’re saying theres a chance. Classic Clooney, breaking up with one of the hottest girls in the world on America’s birthday. Its really insane how quickly guys like him and Leo and John Mayer go through girls. With that said, now is my time to prove to George that we should be best friends. He’s vulnerable, needs a strong male influence to get through this tough time. I feel like if Clooney gave me a chance, I could be the Chris O’Donnell to his Batman. He doesn’t realize it now, but having me around would greatly increase my opportunity of hooking up with world famous supermodels. I could cook him Ryan’s special eggs every morning, and whenever he seduces a lucky lady, I could.lend him my special mix tape to set the mood.

Just think about it George. You have everything in the world except a best friend. Let me be that best friend.

– Ryan

P.S. These are the lengths I’m willing to go for my best friend. A+ in heart.


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