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Madeira, Portugal Unveiled Their New Boner-ific Statue For Hometown Star Cristiano Ronaldo


Have yourself a day, Cristiano. Serious question: is there anyone who loves themselves more than Cristiano Ronaldo? Not only is he only 29 years and still plays soccer, but between his junk and the fohawk this is one of the most disturbing statues in history. Maybe the guy is well endowed, but is that really necessary to include it for people who now have to see this statue every day? If I lived in Madeira I would be extremely upset that I had to look at Cristiano Ronaldo’s statuesque bulge every day. A regular statue is one thing; like I said before, it’s kind of weird because he’s so young and still playing. But depicting your package bulging out of your shorts on an 11 foot statue is a little much. Actually it’s a lot much. Stick to kicking the ball and slaying supermodels, Cristiano. Leave the statues to the pro’s.

– Ryan

H/T NY Daily News

Alex Morgan May Have Just Single Handedly Willed Team USA To a Win Tonight

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No way we lose this game now. Not with Alex Morgan and her fine self on our side.

– Ryan

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