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Oh What A Wonderful Time of the Year…for Santa Brawls

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Looks like New York really stepped up Santacon this year! Ryan, I think I see you! Now where have I seen this before? Oh yeah!

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Jingle All The Way is by far my favorite Christmas movie with Elf holding down the #2 spot.

-Matt

For your enjoyment, here is the full Santa battle royal

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I Don’t Think Dwight Howard Has Ever Watched UFC

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Dwight Howard, an NBA locker room headache for 10 years now, says he’d be willing to one day fight in the UFC – for a $10 million price tag.

“If I get knocked out, I get knocked out,” said Howard, who signed a four-year, $88 million deal with the Rockets in July. “I’ll get back up one day.” – FOXSports.com

Knocked out? You want to fight MMA, and the worst case scenario you can think of is getting knocked out? You’re dumber than you act/look.

Dwight, take a look at this

Can’t knock the hustle though. I would do a TON of dumb shit for 10 million. But Dwight, you just signed an 88 million dollar contract, I didn’t. Lay low, bro.

-MattyV

3 Things Give Me Faith In Humanity

This world is full of hate and uncertainty. But, among the rubble of a society tearing itself apart there are beacons of hope I look to.  Once these are gone then we have truly lost our way.

  1. The High Beam Flash – Your speeding down a road when suddenly someone coming from the opposite way flashes you with their high beams.  You immediately slow down and sure enough right around the corner is a cop, just waiting to tag you will a $100+ dollar speeding ticket.  EVEN IF YOU WERE ONLY GOING 8 OVER TH…….never mind, I digress. This is the ultimate “help thy neighbor” move.  Not to mention I’m pretty sure it’s one of the Ten Commandments.  Yeah, something like: “Thou shalt always warn a fellow driver when a pig layith in wait around a bend”.  I read that…in a book.
  2. YouTube Videos –  Here’s the scenario, you are setting up your new wifi router and cant get it to work.  Obviously you already threw out the manual (who reads those fucking things anyway) so you are kinda screwed.  But wait! The best resource on how-to’s since Google is right in front of you; YouTube.  The amount of tutorial videos on Youtube is insane to me! How in the world do these people have the time to build and review a piece of furniture they got from Ikea?! Don’t get me wrong, i’m not complaining.  I use these videos all the time and I salute the people who make them.  Maybe i’ll start making some helpful Youtube videos and stop posting videos of my friends getting hurt. I said MAYBE.
  3. Halloween –  (Credit to Tom Pags) Halloween is the one time of year when people can go door to door to complete strangers house and get free candy! And on the flip side people are opening up their doors to complete strangers dressed at David Bowie and giving them free stuff!  Any other time of the year and you are telling those people to take a hike, or in some parts of the country, blowing their heads off with a .22.  Other holidays you are only giving to people you know but on Halloween you give to everyone.  When Halloween goes, thats when you know its time to panic.  A little “FYI” for ya. If your house gives apples you are not participating in Halloween; take a hike.

-MattyV

Chara Would Have Eaten You, Crosby

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Here is a little something I made to commemorate the Bruins sweep of the Penguins.  Stupid, flightless, birds.

-MattyV

My Hockey Rant: An Objection to Berno’s “Completely Biased Opinion”

It’s the NHL playoffs, specifically the semi-finals in case you live under a rock. Every year around this time I have to constantly hear why hockey is the greatest sport, and the players are the toughest athletes, blah blah blah. My Facebook explodes with people who feel the need to defend hockey for whatever reason. If the players are so damn tough, let their play and their athletic ability speak for itself. By the way, the only people who chirp about hockey are ex-hockey players. It’s like playing the sport for so many years inflicts an intense inferiority complex that lasts a lifetime. Relax people, it’s a great sport, we get it! There are no other fans on Earth that bitch and moan about their sport not getting enough attention. If you think your sport isn’t getting enough attention place blame on the NHL execs; it’s not the sport, it’s the poor management of the league itself.
Before we start talking about who the toughest athletes in the world, let’s all just take a deep breath and say to ourselves, “What does it really matter?” I’m not going to sit here and take away from what Campbell did the other night. What he did was nothing short of incredible, through pain and agony he finished his shift. But let’s consider the circumstances. He broke his fibula, and important bone to say the least, but did it snap in half like Kevin Ware’s tibia, the weight bearing bone in the lower leg? I suppose he should’ve gotten up and limped around until the next whistle. All I’m saying is there’s instances of heroism in the face of injuries in every sport, but every hockey player in the world get’s a purple star if one player gets hurt, like they all endured it. Let’s give Campbell credit instead of everyone who’s ever picked up a hockey stick. Another question is “Was it a smart move?” What Campbell did was heroic, but if it were the middle of the season, we may be singing a different tune. I can hear the pundits, “He should’ve stayed down, he could’ve furthered his injury and missed more time of the season.” I’d like to refer to Exhibit A: RGIII playing with a torn up knee. As it is he’s only going to miss about 5 games (because the Bruins are going to sweep this and the next series).
If I had to choose the toughest athletes in sports I have to go with offensive and defensive linemen. The big guys, the trench men, they undergo anywhere from 45-60 snaps a game of head to head collisions that are equivalent to small car accidents every single time. Literally, the only stats that ever gets mentioned is snap count and starts, so if they endure less that 45 small car accidents a game, they’re considered below average.
And can we stop it with the whole “fighting is allowed” thing? It’s a penalty, you go to the box. That’s like saying tripping, slashing and high sticking is allowed. Fighting is allowed in football too, your team just gets a 15 yard penalty instead getting put in timeout. Now it’s smart to put your team a man down? Consider the potential for injury, punching someone in the face is a good way to get a boxer’s break, or a break in the fourth or fifth metacarpal, now you’ve just lowered your value to your team as well as your resign value. No wonder why hockey players get paid less, more chance of injury ; but hell, have your cake and eat it too! “Sean Lite, that’s why you have goons to go out there and pick fights with their best players.” To which I reply, “so your sacrificing on-ice talent in the hopes the other premier player loses his cool and swings back?” I don’t know, doesn’t seem like a sound strategy to me, not saying all hockey teams try to do this, but it’s the way it gets explained.
You must think I hate hockey, this is not the case, I thoroughly enjoy watching the sport. Personally it falls in third of my list of favorite spectator sports, just behind college basketball and just before Olympic curling (can’t wait). Yes, professional hockey players are tough while being very athletic and, let’s face it, graceful; as much as diehard hockey fans would hate that word. The sport doesn’t need saving, stop forcing athleticism and toughness down the casual fan’s throat; it’s not a good look.
End of Rant. Out of breath.

-Sean Lite-

P.S. Go Bruins.

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