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David Price Is Signing With The Red Sox, & God Forbid Anybody Has An Opinion About It

MONEY David Price has reached an agreement on a seven-year, $217 million deal with the Boston Red Sox, sources confirmed to ESPN.

The Boston Globe first reported the agreement, citing a source.

Price, 30, was 18-5 with an AL-leading 2.45 ERA last season with the Detroit Tigers and Toronto Blue Jays. He was second in the AL in pitching WAR at 6.0 in 2015.

The five-time All-Star has an opt-out after three years with no deferred money. The yearly payout for Price is $30 million, $30 million, $30 million, $31 million, $32 million, $32 million and $32 million.

Got Paid

One of the worst things about being a Boston sports fan is having to listen to other sports fans (fellow Boston fans included) any time something big happens. The fact is this: since 2001, the four major Boston sports teams have NINE championships. That’s insane, especially if you’re a Patriots and Red Sox fan, who’ve won four and three championships, respectively. There’s no more Evil Empire, there’s no more Lovable Losers, there’s just the city of Boston currently enjoying the greatest run of championships I can ever remember. With all that winning brings a lot of horrible things, including bandwagon fans and the unconditional hate from opposing fans. Out of those four major sports teams, I’m only a Red Sox fan, so that’s where this argument is going to stay. Last offseason, the Red Sox signed Pablo Sandoval and Hanley Ramirez, missed out on signing any semblance of an ace, and spent almost the entire season in last place. Hindsight being 20/20, those were some bad moves. When those moves were made, social media was cluttered with people just waiting to hate on whatever opinion a person had. If you were a Red Sox fan and DARED to support your team, you were ridiculed. If you were a Red Sox fan who opposed the moves, you were called out for not being a ‘real’ fan. If you were an opposing fan who liked or disliked the moves, your best bet was to stay off social media for a long time. Cut to December 2015, and the Red Sox signing David Price, and it’s last year all over again. Now if the Red Sox signed David Price for say, $150 million, it would probably be universally regarded as a great move. But since the number is an astronomical $217 million, it’s invited everyone out of their holes to give their opinion on it. No player is worth that kind of money, but at the same time, the Red Sox took an approach last season and felt that they didn’t need an ‘ace’ to be successful, and they were completely wrong. So when a new general manage takes over, you have to expect his philosophy to be as different as possible, or else why would you get a new general manager in the first place? David Price might struggle in the playoffs, but here’s the only stat I’m worried about at the moment:

Red Sox SP David Price
Win pct .481 .783
ERA 4.39 2.45<<
WHIP 1.33 1.08
K pct 19% 26%

Those are the numbers from last years Sox rotation compared with Price’s numbers last year. Is he worth $217 million? Nope. Is he going to make the Red Sox a better team this year? Absolutely. Get the duck boats ready.




The Latest Shocking Twist In The Tom Brady/Deflate Gate Saga: Jets Fan Think The Patriots Are Cheaters

The Patriots training camp opened today, and a plane flew overhead with a banner reading “cheaters look up”. It’s a little unfair, since every time you see a prop plane with a banner in tow you’re going to look up, but I guess that’s what the Jets fans are into nowadays. It’s tough to blame them, because while every team in the AFC East has spent the off season getting significantly better, their team still has Geno Smith under center. But hey, at least their fans are clever!

– Ryan

Curtis Lazar Capped Of The Ottawa Senators Win Over The Bruins Last Night With An Ice Rink Hamburger

Curtis Lazar must be a fan of the saying “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade”, because life threw him a hamburger last night, and he ate it. I’ll never openly root against the Bruins, as their the hometown team, but you’re not going to win against a competitor as hungry as Curtis. While I’ll never condone wasting that much delicious hamburger, it is a nice little wrinkle to the post game celebration. I have to imagine after three hours of hockey you’re pretty hungry, so what better way to conquer that hunger than with a delicious hamburger that was thrown from the stands? A+ for Curtis, and A+ for the Senator’s fans.

– Ryan


Did Someone Say They Wanna See a Guy With One Leg Get Dragged Out Of a Nets Game? Well Here It Is Anyway

Leg UpA loud Brooklyn Nets fan was carried from his MSG seats Tuesday night kicking and screaming… sort of.

There was plenty of commotion in the upper deck with around five minutes to play in the third quarter of Brooklyn’s 98-93 win over the Knicks as a man with one leg was yanked from his seats – sans his prosthetic limb.

According to a pair of Garden security guards who declined to be identified, the man pulled off his prosthetic leg and hit another fan with it, inciting a ruckus in the upper deck.

This makes me so happy, and not for the reasons you think. No I don’t enjoy seeing one legged people getting dragged out of a Nets game by security. But this was a Brooklyn Nets vs. New York Knicks game. The New York sports scene is so horrible right now, that they’re literally fighting each other with prosthetic legs. Whether this story is true or not is irrelevant; a one legged man had to get carried out of an interstate New York basketball game because he was fighting a fellow New York fan. Also, there’s zero rivalry between the Knicks and Nets. Up until a few years ago, the Nets weren’t even in New York. I just love seeing New York sports fans so desperate. The Knicks suck. The Nets suck. The Jets suck. The Giants suck. Hockey couldn’t matter less, so I don’t count the Rangers or the Islanders. The fans have nowhere to turn, except to each other, and when that happens, the prosthetic legs start flying. Oh happy day.

– Ryan

The Insane Clown Posse is Suing the FBI in the Name of Their Fans!

The 2003 BillBoard Music Awards - Arrival

Horrorcore-rap duo Insane Clown Posse, along with four fans, are suing the Department of Justice and the FBI, demanding that the agencies purge the fan name “Juggalos” from their list of gang members. “Organized crime is by no means part of the Juggalo culture,” reads the complaint, filed this morning in federal court in Detroit. -Rolling Stone

WHOOP WHOOP! Damn right! It’s about time my name gets cleared from the FBI’s most wanted list! Shaggy and Violent J have been dealing wit this issue for a while now. So long, in fact, I can remember when the “Fuck the FBI” chants started about 3 or 4 years ago at the shows i’ve attended. Not that the chant was, at all, helping our cause. But, in all seriousness this is a terrible classification of the Juggalos and Juggaletes. If anyone has ever been to an ICP show you will know that, while it can get pretty rowdy, there is no safer place. Family is a theme that courses through the veins of the Juggalos, and they show it.

So… Fuck the FBI!


Shipping Up For Game 6

This afternoon The Average Nobodies are shipping up to Boston to watch game six of The World Series from a bar outside of Fenway! We will keep you updated by way of vines (@averagenobodies), tweets (@averagenobodies), and videos (! The Nobodies and Boston are in for one hell of a night!




Follow @BestFansStLouis If You Wanna See What Cardinals Fans Are All About



Stay classy, St. Louis.

9er’s Fan Al Needs To Pump His Brakes


Guy likes to see homo’s naked. Nothing wrong with that. 9er’s fan Al just had to get this license plate. Good work Al. Maybe next time go with a bumper sticker.

– Ryan


Thanks to Deadspin for the pic.

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