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Your Body is 90% Water [The Doctah Is In]


Popeye ate his spinach.  The Doctah ate his spirulina.


The color of money. The color of trees. The color of magic.

Well, yeah, I don’t know about the magic part, but let The Doctah edumacate ya.

In 1940, Popeye ate his spinach.  It had amazing effects.  Protein, yum.  Big muscles, plenty of ladies.  Olive oil, yes, Olive oil, stole his heart.

Do you understand the lingo?  The oil was the bread to his butter.  (Yes he owned both).


That’s was in the 1940s.

There’s been a lot of informacion back then that tells us that green is still the way, but spinach, eh … its okay. (The Doctah can rhyme too)

Now, there are newer foods out there: spirulina and chlorella to be exact.

So what are spirulina and chlorella? Well they are sea algae.

Your next question should be, “Why the F*ck” would I eat sea algae?

Well that’s simple, young jedi.  Your body is made up of 90% water or 95% or some very high number like that.  So that means stuff from water, especially from the sea, will have a beneficial effect on your body.

The spirulina contains high quality protein as well as other high quality sources of variable nutrients for your body to consume.

Nutrients = Good.  Just in case you didn’t know.

The chlorella contains chloryphyl.  Chloryphyll is essential for plants to grow.  People do not generally think of themselves as plants, BUT, i’ll give it to you simply:  what does a plant do?  It grows.  What do people do?  Generally they grow.  Hmmm… molto interesante.

Now go on Amazon, and grab some hawaiin pacifica spirulina and some 1000mg chlorella.  If you got the cash, grab a 3 month supply.  Come see the Doctah in 3 months, and I dare ya to tell the Doctah you don’t feel better.

Disclaimer:  The Doctah does not try to cure you, you cure you.  He just shows you the way.

Stay sexy my Nobodies.

-The Doctah

Sammee Matthews Really Likes Doughnuts

(Source) “Obese Sammee Matthews has a condition which makes her so turned on by food she even scoffs doughnuts during sex.

Twenty eight stone Sammee was diagnosed with sitophilia – an erotic obsession with food – in her case cakes and sweets.

The mum-of-two from Las Vegas, USA, says just the sight of a bakery is enough to send her weak at the knees and out of breath.

And her sexual fixation on sponge cake has contributed to weight gain which saw her tip the scales at 32 stone.

Sammee’s story can be seen in Fat for Cash on Channel 5 at 9pm on Wednesday as part of Supersize Season.”

I’d consider myself someone who likes doughnuts. I’ll go to the bakery now and again to get a brownie or two. Not Sammee Matthews. She’s got an erotic obsession with dessert. This is a tough one for me. On the one hand, is this where we are as a society? We can’t just say Sammee is enormous and clearly has a problem controlling how much she eats. Nope. She has a disorder which forces her to eat cakes and cookies. Newsflash Sammee: it’s called gluttony. Don’t make excuses.

On the other hand, I kind of understand where she’s coming from.  Everyone would love to eat a brownie or a piece of chocolate cake during sex right? It’s the American dream. Sammee is giving us all hope that this might one day be the norm. Kind of a like a real life George Costanza. Just don’t fly too close to the sun on the wings of pastrami.

– Ryan


Just What The Doctor Ordered


Burger King has finally come up with a solution to that most vexing question that has plagued mankind for decades: “In a world of multitasking, how can you use your hands to do daily activities and eat a Whopper at the same time?”

Enter the hands-free Whopper holder, a plastic device that hangs from the neck and places your Whopper inches from your mouth. All extraneous movement has been removed from the burger-eating process, including the act of bending your arms to bring the sandwich closer to your mouth.

With both hands released from the restrictive and calorie-wasting act of food eating, Whopper lovers are free to perform all of their favorite or pressing tasks while enjoying the flame-broiled goodness of Burger King’s signature sandwich. -USA Today

Just when I thought I was going to have an extra arm sewed onto my neck, Burger King reads my mind!  Who has time to eat FAST FOOD normally? I sure as hell don’t.  With changing radio stations, texting and driving, not wearing my seatbelt, and all the other tomfoolery that occurs in my car I just can’t seem to find a open time, or hand, to enjoy my Whopper.  In comes the ‘Hands-free Whopper holder’, basically a plastic feedbag that makes you looks like the fat pig-horse-man you really are.  If I start seeing these popping up I will move to the north pole.


P.S. Create a hands-free taco device and I might sing another tune.

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