Friday night is going to be a big night at Fenway, with the Red Sox officially retiring David Ortiz’ number 34. The ceremony figures to be a relatively long one, which is only fitting to honor arguably the largest figure in franchise history. Some of the ceremony is going to be a surprise, but on Wednesday we learned of one portion. The city of Boston is planning to rename a street after the legendary Red Sox slugger.The street to be renamed after him is currently known as the Yawkey Way Extension, and it lies between Brookline Ave and Yawkey Station. Starting Friday night, it will be known as David Ortiz Drive. – Over The Monster
David Ortiz’s name will take it’s rightful place alongside Yawkey Way this week, as the city of Boston and the Red Sox are turning Yawkey Way Extension into David Ortiz Drive. I’ll be at the number retirement/baseball game tomorrow night, and I can’t wait to see Big Papi back on the Fenway diamond. He’s the greatest Red Sox player of my generation, and will obviously go down in history as one of the handful of greats the organization has ever had. I watch that grand slam video I embedded above on a weekly basis, and there’s about a dozen more videos where he’s heroically winning the game for the Sox. Congrats to David Ortiz.
— David Ortiz (@davidortiz) December 15, 2014
@davidortiz Ha! Figured the only way to get my 1st major league hit was to don the number of the greatest hitter I’ve ever seen. Love u bro!
— Jon Lester (@JLester31) December 16, 2014
Well this is wonderful and depressing at the same time. We got Justin Masterson and Rick Porcello and Wade Miley, three pitchers under 30 who are by no means a staff ace, but we will absolutely bolster the Red Sox starting staff. Unfortunately, we got those three guys because we no longer have Jon Lester. If Masterson, Porcello or Miley don’t become David Ortiz’s best friend immediately, I don’t know if he’ll be able to recover. Side note: saying HAHAHA in a conversation has now been replaced by jajajaja.
Kevin Love has apparently been showing some interest in moving east and joining up with the Boston Celtics. Over the weekend he attended a Red Sox game at Fenway Park and even was caught shaking hands with Rondo! As far as i’m concerned this is a done deal. If you shake Rondo’s hand and come to Fenway Park for a game then you are an official Bostonian in my book. Listen Kev, can I call you Kev? Mr. Love? Ok, I’ll go with Kev. Kev, Boston is a town of champions, do you want to be a champion? That’s what I thought. Bill Paxton is from Texas, but I would be willing to bet if he had a choice on where to be born and play professional basketball it would be the Bean. And if that’s not reason enough to be a Celtic here are 10 added bonuses.
The 10 things I would do if you [Kevin Love] played for the Celtics
- Buy your away and home jerseys. Nothing says “come to Boston” like merch royalties.
- Knit you a nice sweater. I can’t knit, but I will learn.
- I will be your personal assistant. Dry cleaning? Done. Rides around town? Chauffeured. Dinner reservations? Not to brag, but I have NEVER waited for a seat at Chilis.
- I will give you a personalized pre-game warmup. I am not known for my athletic abilities, but ask anybody I know (or at least Ryan) and they/he will undoubtedly tell you about my skills as a basketball trainer. They don’t call my backyard “the breeding ground for pro athletes”* for nothing.
- Hand written letters to all your correspondents. Texts? Emails? Phone calls? SO impersonal. From now on I will write and hand deliver all of your messages. This might make things take a lot longer, but trust me you will be a better man because of it.
- I will be the interior decorator of your New England home. New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Massachusetts? Wherever you decide to buy a home leave it to me for the decorating. How do you feel about patterned wallpaper, comic book posters, and the color orange?
- Buy you a 30-rack of your choice**
- Take you on a private tour of Rhode Island. The majority of the day will be spent at my house playing video games or in Newport flying kites, but if you ask me, that’s Rhode Island in a nutshell.
- Join Ryan and I on a trip back to Fenway Park for a Red Sox game. If this actually happens then it is a real treat because it is a rarity we even make it inside the stadium.
- Wake up calls every morning, and not just a regular wake up call, nope, I will call you and sing any song you request. Most of the time I will ignore your request and sing “Fields of Gold”, but honestly is there a better option, especially with my range?
*Nobody calls it that