Of Course – A 54-year-old man was arrested on Christmas Eve after allegedly taking “crack cocaine” into the Intensive Care Unit at North Okaloosa Medical Center to share with a patient there.

A fire broke out at 3:43 p.m. when the patient, who was on oxygen, tried to smoke the cocaine from a homemade smoking device, according to a media release from Crestview Police Department.

The only property damage was to the bed linen, hospital gown and oxygen mask, the release said.

The ICU are was not evacuated.

“The potential was there for a lot of damage,” said Crestview Police Lt. Donald Fountain. “It could have been a lot worse.”

He noted that the other patients and the staff could have been injured had the fire not been extinguished so quickly.

Crestview Fire Department responded to the fire.

The patient was transported to a burn unit as a result of burns he received, according to the release.

Florida can’t be a real place. There’s just no way so much insane shit can happen in one state without some other worldly force being behind it. The best part of this story isn’t that a man brought crack cocaine to the hospital, it’s that the person actually in the ICU tried to smoke the crack and lit himself on fire. Not only is this guy in the ICU ON OXYGEN, but now he’s in the burn unit because he engulfed himself while trying to smoke crack. That is a fucking trifecta if I’ve ever heard of one. Maybe lay off the crack while you’re in the ICU? I’m no doctor, but I can’t imagine that smoking crack is going to improve your already horrible health. In these guys defense though, who doesn’t want a nice bowl of crack cocaine for Christmas? Tough to hate on them for that.

– Ryan