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Note to Self: Don’t Get the Calamari If You Go to China

Condom PartyA Chinese diner who thought her calamari was too chewy was disgusted to find out it was actually a condom.

Mai Liang was halfway through her seafood-dish at an Anhui province restaurant when she discovered the “rubbery” ring was actually a rubber.

“Imagine my horror when I turned it over with my fork and it turned out to be a contraceptive,” she told Metro.

“It was disgusting. My first horrific thought was: Is it used?” she told Metro.

Sickened to her stomach, she complained to staff.

Boss Yi Ze Teng arrived and angrily accused her of planting the prophylactic in her food to get a free meal.

Teng then reportedly said that she would eat the condom if they left the matter. And she did.

Liang said she was now talking to lawyers and may sue the restaurant.


I’m not sure who’s side to take in this story. Obviously seeing a condom in your calamari is bad. I understand that. But if you go to China and order calamari you’re asking for trouble. Maybe not condom trouble, but some kind of trouble. Calamari is at the absolute bottom of the list of foods I’d eat in China. You know what’s on the top of that list? Literally everything else. If I was a Chinese chef who spent my whole life perfecting the art of sushi and wantons and I saw a calamari slip come through my kitchen I’d probably throw a condom in there too. That’s like going to a nice Italian restaurant and ordering dumpling soup. Complete disrespect and this chef wasn’t tolerating it. How about this psychopathic owner eating part of the condom? What point is she trying to prove? That condoms belong in calamari and are indeed tasty? I’d love to say this a power move but its too disgusting for that. Moral of the story is don’t order calamari in China, and don’t challenge Yi Ze Teng’s authority. She’ll eat a condom all over your face.

– Ryan


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