That’s a pretty long and drawn out celebration metaphor (am I using that correctly), but I do enjoy the effort. Sounds like you have some ex-girlfriend issues to work through, but when your heart is healed take a look at this and learn from a true pro, Jack Edwards:
THAT is how it’s done.
When Sarah Colwill, 38, was hospitalized for an intense migraine in 2010, she awoke to an astounding sound—her voice.
Her familiar English accent had been replaced by what sounded like a poor impression of a Chinese person, leaving doctors scratching their heads.
Her predicament was a side effect of a rare neurological condition called Foreign Accent Syndrome.
Colwill is one of just 150 confirmed cases ever of FAS, according to the Independent. The condition is most often caused by damage to the brain brought on by a stroke or traumatic brain injury, UT Dallas reports.
In a new BBC documentary ‘The Woman Who Woke Up Chinese,’ which aired Tuesday, Colwill’s life with an alien voice proves to be less like an episode of Summer Heights High and more like a nightmare. -BBC
I know a scam when I see one, and this, ladies and gentlemen, is a scam. Foreign Accent Syndrome? They should just probably change it to “I don’t wanna sound like me anymore disease”. One minute she is having tea and scrumpets, then next she is singing ‘Deck The Halls’ like the people at the end of A Christmas Story. Let me explain how this worked. Lady got a super crazy migraine from hearing herself speak, decided to ditch the british accent and go absolutely rogue. Not sure why she went Chinese, but hey it’s working out for her. She is pretty good at it and will only get better in time. Personally I would have went full language change. Just start speaking the little Spanish I know over and over again until I pick up new words and develop a beast of a vocabulary. Change your accent all you want hunny, but don’t start crying Chinese wolf on us. You and the 150 other cases in the world just need to own up to what you’re doing. No one will hate you for it.