Blog Archives

Jared Allen Might Have Just Retired In Classic Fashion

I don’t know if this is an official retirement or not, but if it is, good for Jared Allen. Some guys need to hold a big press conference or announce it at the beginning of the season so everyone can swing their boners at them and tell them how great they were. Not Jared Allen. All he needs is to bring a popular phrase to life by literally riding off into the sunset (or the cloudy sky). Allen has been a great defensive lineman for the Chiefs, Vikings, Bears & Panthers, racking up 136 total sacks in his career, which would lead all active players. He led the NFL in sacks twice and made five pro bowls, and has one of the best sack celebrations ever. Plus, he wore number 69. If you can’t root for a guy wearing number 69 then you have no soul. If this is truly the end for Allen, then thanks for a great career, and have fun riding horses into the cloudy skies.

-Ryan

Super Bowl 50 Is Off To A Rousing Start As The Grounds Crew Painted Both End Zones For The Broncos

Come on grounds crew. You had one job. Ok they have more than one job, for the sake of an argument, they have one job: make sure the end zones are painted with a different team logo. The Broncos aren’t facing Broncos. The Panthers aren’t facing the Panthers. The Broncos are facing the Panthers, thus one end zone should say Broncos and one end zone should say Panthers. Seems pretty simple right? Not for those San Francisco folk. They better not mess anything up when WrestleMania comes to town or else this music will be the last thing they ever hear.

-Ryan

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