Advertisements

Blog Archives

Trailer Alert – The Snowman

I’m a sucker for Fassbender. That being said, when I found out he was starring in The Snowman a year or so back, I went to Barnes & Noble and picked up the novel first. I liked the book so much, I’ve since read 3 others’ in author Jo Nesbo’s Harry Hole crime novels. I have been drooling for this trailer for months now and let me tell you, it does not disappoint. The music for the trailer is perfect, the filming locations look beautiful and absolutely nothing is given away. In the simple words of Magneto, “perfection.” The cast includes Michael Fassbender as Detective Harry Hole, Rebecca Ferguson and JK Simmons to name a few. Combined with Director Tomas Alfredson known state side for his work on Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, we’re in for an edge of your seat serial murder mystery thriller. I’d like to say I won’t watch another trailer for this flick because I’m beyond hyped for it and this was all I needed to see, but then again, I can’t control myself. If anyone needs me, I’ll be watching this trailer on repeat for the rest of the day.

-Adam

Advertisements

Trailer Alert: The Martian (#2)

Matt already summed up mine (and probably everyone else’s) feeling after The Martian’s first trailer dropped, but I’ll be damned if I’m not going to post the second trailer. Nobody loves filming shit floating around in space more than Ridley Scott, and luckily for us, he’s extremely good at it. Plus, the cast is dynamite, so this movie is 100% going to be bananas. Mark your dicks, October 2nd is fast approaching.

-Ryan

Trailer Alert – The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2

The trailer for the fourth installment of the Hunger Games franchise is finally here, and things actually start out kind of happy. When a movie is titled ‘The Hunger Games’ you’re not really expecting sunshine and rainbows, but the beginning of this trailer actually features a wedding and smiles and hope. That hope is immediately superseded by death and destruction but hey, it was nice while it lasted. I still haven’t seen the first Mockingjay movie so I’m a little lost as to exactly what’s happening, but a movie trailer is a movie trailer, and a blogger’s got to blog about it. Mockingjay Part 2 comes out later this year just in time for turkey time with your family.

– Ryan

Amazon Customer Reviews: ‘How To Avoid Big Ships’ By John W. Trimmer

I’m pretty excited for this one. Let’s get to the reviews.

‘How To Avoid Big Ships’

image

WHY NO KINDLE EDITION??????

Given that there is a huge ship bearing down on me RIGHT NOW I am extremely disappointed that I cannot get inst

 

Caution: Check the title before purchase

I live near a park and frequently walk around the local area. Given the amount of dog mess that is on the pavements I thought this book would be the ideal read to stop me having to scrape my shoes on the grass before going home. It was only after it arrived that I looked closely at the title and realised it said ‘How to Avoid Huge SHIPS’. A simple error that means I am still treading on massive examples of canine excrement. Having said that, I read the book anyway, and I’m pleased to say I’m not even having near misses with huge ships anymore. No sir, they aint getting anywhere near me!

 

Excellent book! No more accidents for me!

As an Iceberg i can say that this book was a great help to me and my spiraling depression. Being larger than a huge ship has given me problems such as running into them without knowing it and sometimes sending them into panic even if i don’t. John W. Trimmer has truly brought me past my self defeating depression in giving me the confidence knowing that i will never repeat the same mistake I made April 14 1912. Thanks Captain!

 

Now my ship can FINALLY come in

All my life, people told me that “one day my ship would finally come in”. Naturally, I was terrified. What if my ship was huge?

To avoid this outcome – I sabotaged myself; dropping out of school at age 8, and replacing the milk on my daily cereal with a homemade mixture of moonshine and wallpaper paste.

Since reading this book – I finally got over my fears and decided to become successful. This week alone I have started my own talk show, written a classical opera, taught myself to read and write (both English and Hindu), and invented the iFire – a fireplace you can control like a touchscreen by simply ramming your fist into the naked flames.

Pre-orders are already worth $4 billion. Thank you John W. Trimmer!!

 

Invaluable until you know it only applies to ships

I’m now getting tired of constantly running into huge space shuttles. Huge ships used to be a massive problem. After reading this, not one ship have I encountered. Well, that’s a lie. I’ve run into a few tiny ships, but the book on avoiding those isn’t out til 2023. So, not an issue. However, the huge space shuttles are proving to be a constant annoyance. I’ve had to devise my own methods in avoiding them. I’ve even tried applying this book by changing the word ‘ships’ with ‘space shuttles’ but, obviously this is futile.

 

Any tips or suggestions for amazon products you want featured? Send them to @averagenobodies.

– Ryan

TNW – Jenna Jameson, Kanye & Kim, and Brandon Meriweather

– The Average Nobodies

Barbie Dolls Being in the Toy Hall of Fame Before Ninja Turtles is Bullshit

(Source) ROCHESTER, N.Y. — The National Toy Hall of Fame has narrowed the nominees for its class of 2013.

This year’s finalists are: Bubbles, chess, the board game Clue, Fisher-Price Little People, little green Army men, the Magic 8 Ball, My Little Pony, Nerf toys, the Pac-Man video game, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the scooter and the rubber duck.

The museum announced the 12 finalists Tuesday, two of which will be enshrined alongside Barbie, the hula hoop, Lionel trains and dozens of other famous playthings next month.

A national selection committee will vote on which two will follow last year’s winners, dominoes and “Star Wars” action figures, into the 15-year-old hall, located inside The Strong museum in Rochester.

Anyone can nominate a toy for induction. A museum committee of curators, educators and historians chooses the finalists based on a toy’s longevity, innovation, and other attributes. Each toy must be widely recognized; foster learning, creativity or discovery through play; and endure in popularity over generations, according to the hall.

This year’s nominees trace their origins across centuries, from chess, which evolved in England during the 15th century, to the rubber ducky, which appeared in the 1800s, to Pac-Man and My Little Pony, which appeared in the 1980s.

A Chicago company called Chemtoy sold the first soap bubble solution in the 1940s, though paintings of children playing with bubbles appeared in the country of Flanders in the 17th century, hall officials said.

Some of the nominees have made the finals before, including plastic green Army men, Clue and the Magic 8 Ball. Thousands of suggestions come in every year.

Previous winners range from classics, like Play-Doh and Slinky, to the less obvious, like the stick and cardboard box. This year’s winners will be announced at an induction ceremony Nov. 7.”

image

Vs.

image

Are you shitting me? How do barbie dolls get into the Toy Hall of Fame before the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? So a blonde with a clear eating disorder who only hangs out with beautiful people gets the star treatment while the less handsome Ninja Turtles get shafted? I thought we were trying to promote an anti-bully culture here in America. Barbie is the ultimate bully. Meanwhile the ninja turtles are relegated to living in sewers, eating nothing but pizza and taking orders from an aging rat. Still, the Ninja Turtles have never complained. They don’t demand praise like Barbie does. Barbie always had to get a new car, a new playhouse, a new boyfriend. The Ninja Turtles have worn the same goddamn bandana’s for the past 30 years. The least the Toy Hall of Fame could have done was show them the respect they deserve and induct them in before some Jezebel. Nope. Disrespected again. The next time some alien who sounds weirdly similar to Uncle Phil from Fresh Prince starts terrorizing America don’t be surprised if a group of talking turtles and a rat with a walking stick aren’t there to help you.

– Ryan

Great Lincoln’s Beard: Ron Burgundy Is Writing A Memoir

“Ron Burgundy’s “classy” life story will soon be coming to book shelves. A memoir about San Diego’s fictional Action 4 News Team anchor was announced on Wednesday to coincide with the upcoming release of “Anchorman: The Legend Continues,” a sequel to the 2004 hit comedy starring Will Ferrell, “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.” “Let Me Off at the Top! My Classy Life and Other Musings” will chronicle Burgundy’s beginnings, from his early childhood to his rise as a star journalist. No topics are off limits, including Burgundy’s many love conquests and his beloved dog, Baxter. “The list of legendary American broadcast news journalists is short: Edward R. Murrow, Walter Cronkite, and, of course, Ron Burgundy,” said Mauro Di Preta, vice president and editor-in-chief at the memoir’s publishing house, Crown Archetype. “The printed page will allow Ron to tell his story in a much more intimate way. ‘Let Me Off at the Top!’ will be a classic for years to come.” “Burgundy” also has high hopes for the memoir. “I don’t know if it’s the greatest autobiography ever written. I’m too close to the work,” Burgundy said in a press release, adding,”I will tell you this much: The first time I sat down and read this thing…I cried like a goddamn baby, and you can take that to the bank!” “Let Me Off at the Top! My Classy Life and Other Musings” will be released in digital and print formats on Nov. 19.” – CBS News

images

Will Ferrell and company sure do know how to build anticipation for a movie. Apparently the book, titled Let Me Off At The Top! My Classy Life and Other Musings, will document Ron Burgundy’s entire life, from childhood to his exploits as an anchorman. I have a feeling we’ve seen the last of Will Ferrell until Anchorman premieres December 20th. He’s 100% Ron Burgundy now. While I can’t see many other movies adopting this type of marketing strategy, one thing is for sure: no one transforms themselves into the characters they play better than Will Ferrell.

– Ryan

%d bloggers like this: