The NFL season is getting closer and closer, which is a good thing, because it’s only a matter of time before our bosses figure out we’ve actually been doing mock drafts all day instead of doing actual work. Sticking with our NFL Monster Blog theme, this week we examine the art of the facial hair. It’s no secret NFL player are enormous, powerful men, but just like in the real world, a monster beard is a sign of power. Here are our favorite NFL beards:
Jason Kelce – Philadelphia Eagles
I like Jason Kelce’s beard so much he might just become my new favorite player. Extra points for the beard just flowing right up into his mane like he’s some kind of lion-human hybrid. If you ask me, the Eagles are missing out on a major marketing opportunity here. Remember how crazy everyone (myself included) went for the Red Sox “bearded brothers” thing last season? Why not start a movement in Philly and have Jason be the ring leader? It’s not like the Eagles have anything else to root for, except for praying to the football Gods that Lesean McCoy doesn’t snap his femur. Let the beards flow.
Bret Keisel – Pittsburgh Steelers
I guess Pennsylvania has great beards running through its veins because my beard comes from the Keystone State; which I assume got its name from the great volume of keystone beer they consume (I am being told that is completely false). My beard choice was probably the easiest decision I have ever made on Monster Blog Wednesday. If people with awesome beards started their own country then Bret Keisel would be King of everything and as far as his beard could see. Thick? Yes Overwhelming? Yes. Magical? Well, I’d like to think so. This man’s beard transcends facial hair. This chine mane has gotten to the point where it looks like his beard is growing a beard of its own! I dream and pray for facial hair like this. One day, Matt. One day.