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Oh Good: The Waters Being Used For The Olympics In Rio de Janeiro Are Highly Contaminated With Human Feces

YumAthletes in next year’s Summer Olympics here will be swimming and boating in waters so contaminated with human feces that they risk becoming violently ill and unable to compete in the games, an Associated Press investigation has found.

An AP analysis of water quality revealed dangerously high levels of viruses and bacteria from human sewage in Olympic and Paralympic venues — results that alarmed international experts and dismayed competitors training in Rio, some of whom have already fallen ill with fevers, vomiting and diarrhea.

It is the first independent comprehensive testing for both viruses and bacteria at the Olympic sites.

Brazilian officials have assured that the water will be safe for the Olympic athletes and the medical director of the International Olympic Committee said all was on track for providing safe competing venues. But neither the government nor the IOC tests for viruses, relying on bacteria testing only.

Extreme water pollution is common in Brazil, where the majority of sewage is not treated. Raw waste runs through open-air ditches to streams and rivers that feed the Olympic water sites.

As a result, Olympic athletes are almost certain to come into contact with disease-causing viruses that in some tests measured up to 1.7 million times the level of what would be considered hazardous on a Southern California beach.

Messed Up

Of all things an Olympic athlete would want to swim through, I have to imagine human sewage is very low on the list. It might not even be on the list. I guess this is the risk you take putting the Olympics in Brazil, but this is obscene. Also. maybe test the waters and get this information out to the public BEFORE you choose where the Olympics are being held. Now you have people going there to train and getting sick because they’re swimming through human shit. The most shocking stat comes at the end, as some waters that were tested were up to 1.7 million times the level of hazardous conditions. 1.7 million! That’s an insane number no matter what you’re testing for, but when the tests include human feces, it’s downright nasty. I don’t know what the remedy for this is, and I know there isn’t one that’s going to make these waters safe by next year, so Mr. Olympic has some serious decisions to make.

– Ryan


Gatorade’s 50th Anniversary Commercial Is Wonderful

Gatorade and Nike, they just know how to make inspiring sports commercials. Gatorade is celebrating it’s 50th anniversary in 2015, so it’s fitting that it would commemorate that milestone with all the moments that made them one of if not the top beverage of choice for athletes everywhere. Personally I like Red Bull, but that’s probably why my 40 yard dash time is astronomical. Enjoy the commercial, and mix in some Gatorade with your vodka this weekend to celebrate.

– Ryan

Only the Best and the Brightest Athletes Show Up to Trivia Night

Trivia Tiebreaker


Intensity. Integrity. Intelligence. Are those Olympic athletes doing the football toss? Tough to tell, but it’s clear Wednesday Trivia Night is the breeding ground for the future of America. The future sure does look bleak.

– Ryan

P.S. Take notes on how to toss..

I’m Ready For The Badwater Ultramarathon

“AdventureCORPS, Inc., an event production firm specializing in ultra-endurance and extreme sports events, hosts BADWATER® 135 annually in July of each year. Recognized globally as “the world’s toughest foot race,” this legendary event pits up to 100 of the world’s toughest athletes—runners, triathletes, adventure racers, and mountaineers—against one another and the elements. Covering 135 miles (217km) non-stop from Death Valley to Mt. Whitney, CA in temperatures up to 130F (55c), it is the most demanding and extreme running race offered anywhere on the planet. The 36th anniversary edition is July 15-17, 2013.” –

Not bad. Little 135 mile race through Death Valley to get the blood flowing. Here’s the route these psychopath’s take:

I got tired just trying to figure out where the beginning and end of the route was. Anytime you see the words “Death Valley” in the middle of your running route I think you should just pack up your things, go home and count it as a loss. According to the official website, one of the main symptoms participants experience is chronic back fatigue. You don’t say. You mean running 135 miles over 48 hours in 130 degree heat isn’t good for the back?

Here’s an example of the beautiful landscape the runner’s get to experience:

Gorgeous right? Except the fact that you’re basically trying to complete a death march. You could project a velvet painting of a whale and a dolphin getting it on in the sky for the entire race and that still wouldn’t change the fact that I’m making the worst decision of my life.

To the legitimately insane people who complete, or even attempt this race: bravo. Give me a 48 hour heads up before you snap and start trying to rob liquor stores with rubber duckies.Because it’s going to happen.

– Ryan

P.S. This guy finished the ultramarathon with a prosthetic leg. Enjoy your hour of cardio on the treadmill this weekend you two legged freaks.


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