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The New Yorker Electrifies The Magazine Cover Game

cuneo-weiner-cover

Power move, guys. Power move.

-Matt Danger

Anthony Weiner, Cornering The Market In Awesome Aliases

mayor-anthony-weiner-it-could-happenIt was bound to happen sooner or later: An anonymous woman has claimed to the Arizona-based gossip and nudies site The Dirty that she carried on an explicit online affair with mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner — after he was busted and forced to resign from Congress for the exact same thing. “She was lured by Anthony Weiner post scandal via Facebook,” wrote the site’s editor Nik Ritchie yesterday. “They had a relationship for 6 months and she believed they were in love … The relationship consisted of Anthony Weiner and Anonymous sending sexually explicit pictures of each other and having sexual conversations via phone. The best part was Anthony used an alias this time thinking this would protect him. Anthony Weiner used the name ‘Carlos Danger’ when he would email pictures of his penis via Yahoo.” -NYMag.com

Anthony Weiner is at it again, but hold on one HOT SECOND. Carlos Danger? Really. That’s the name you’re going with? All this time I thought Anthony Weiner was just a dick pic machine, but now I know for sure……that he is also a genius! What an Alias! I wish I had gotten to it sooner. Back in the day, when you tried to impress all your friends with clever AIM names, this one would have killed it! All the girlies would have been crawling all over my AIM profile.

Ok, so Weiner not only gets right back on the sexting express (NSFW) but his defense is totally weak. “I said that other texts and photos were likely to come out, and today they have.”  That’s all you got, Weiner? I’ll remember that next time I go on a dick pic killing spree, or any other other crime wave. “I told you, officer, that I might rob another liquor store, and today I have. That”s all on you.” Not exactly somehting that will stand up in court. At least not in Rhode Island….cough cough….i’m looking at you Florida.

-MattyV

PS- This is isn’t the last time we will hear about Anthony Weiner’s Dick. Mark my words.

PSS- This is what I imagine Carlos Danger looks like (Via Twitter)

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