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059 – XFL, UFO and NBC

Average Nobodies Podcast

For December 20, 2017.

On today’s show we’re talking people watching, The Office Revival, UFO sightings and the possible return of the XFL. You can chat with us on Twitter @AverageNobodies, toss us a like on Facebook @AverageNobodies and heart all our pictures on instagram, @AverageNobodies. Don’t forget, this podcast is available on iTunes, Stitcher Radio and YouTube.


Opening (00:00 – 01:10), Oscar predictions (01:10 – 24:20), New planets (24:20 – 32:00), The future of AN (32:00 – 39:45), What are we watching (39:45 – 49:00), Closing (50:18)

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Trailer/Boner Alert: Independence Day – Resurgence

As I’m watching the Patriots maul the Texans last night on SNF, something marvelous happens: Jeff Goldblum’s beautiful face appears on my television screen and before I know it my pants are off and I can’t stop being giddy. I don’t know if this trailer was announced or not, but I had no clue it was coming and it was beyond amazing. The original Independence Day was one of those spectacle type movies that really only get better with each viewing. I’d also have to be some type of monster to not enjoy seeing Jeff Goldbum and a grizzled Bill Pullman talking about aliens again. Getting to see a movie like this in IMAX is going to be an EVENT, and I cannot wait.


P.S. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t waiting for Will Smith to pop in. Damn you, William.

Monster Blog Wednesday: Our Favorite Halloween Horror Movie Villains


Halloween is one of the few holidays that evolve as you get older. Easter, Christmas and Thanksgiving pretty much stay the same no matter how old you get: you hang with your family, you eat too much food, you watch whatever sport is on at the time. Halloween changes drastically from childhood to adult hood. When your a kid, you loved dressing up and going trick or treating (unless you’re one of those really cool people who hate Halloween). You ate to so much candy that you got sick to your stomach but it was totally worth it, because candy is amazing. As you grow up, Halloween becomes the night you dress and go to Halloween parties and drink too much. It’s usually a blast; without adult Halloween parties we’d never have the chance to break up a fight between a member of the Mighty Ducks and a ghost. One part of Halloween that doesn’t change are horror movies. Horror movies and Halloween go together like lamb and tuna fish, and you can’t have a great (or successful) horror movie without a great a villain. Here are our favorite horror movie villains.

Damien Thorn – The Omen

I will never look at children the same way after watching this movie. That probably came out weird, but you get the point. Damien from The Omen was the freakiest, weirdest most deranged child in the history of cinema. He’s got nanny’s hanging themselves and SPOILER ALERT: he’s the fucking Anti-Christ. Masked villains are haunting, but to me there is nothing scarier than a demon disguised as a perfectly normal child. When/if I have children, any friends they bring over are going to have to go through rigorous demon testing. Nobody get’s one over on ole’ Ryan.

– Ryan

The Alien – Alien, Aliens, Alien 3, Alien Resurrection, Alien Versus Predator, Prometheus

“In Space No One Can Hear You Scream”. Probably one of the most memorable horror/thriller lines of all time to go along with the most badass horror movie villain to ever grace the silver screen. The Alien from Alien (and a bunch other movies) is a bad mother fucker who would happily rip your heart clean out of your chest without hesitation. You want suspense in a movie? Watch Alien in the dark, go ahead, I DARE you. That shit is scary no matter how many times you watch it and no matter how old you are. Sure, The Alien isn’t supernatural or demonic, but I can guarantee you that if the girl from “The Ring” saw this dude coming out of a TV set she would run to the well from once she came.




1 in 10 Americans Think Aliens Are Behind the Disapperance of Malaysian Flight 370

UFO – “One in ten Americans think ‘space aliens’ were involved in the disappearance if the Malaysian Airlines flight MH370, it was revealed today.

A survey found that nine per cent of the people believe ‘space aliens or beings from another dimension were involved’.

Investigators are still continuing their search for the missing plane and the 239 people on board, which vanished from radars on March 8.”


Well this is a good look for Americans: crazy alien conspiracy theorists. Although I gotta say, if there’s one case on the entire planet that could fit the alien theory, its Malaysian flight 370. With all the technology that exists in this world, how does a giant airplane just go missing for six weeks without any way to trace it? You’re telling me we have the technology that allows cats to talk to spiders but we can’t find a goddamn airplane that steered off course? When “aliens were invovled” is the scenario that makes the most sense, you know you fucked up. I’m not saying I believe aliens did it, but I’m also NOT saying that. Unless we find this plane, the alien theory is going to stand strong.

– Ryan

Will Smith is a BUM

According to an interview with New York Daily News, director Roland Emmerich explained that Will Smith would not be returning for the Independence Day sequel (due out in 2015) because he simply costs too much. “Will Smith can not come back because he’s too expensive, but he’d also be too much of a marquee name,” the filmmaker said. -Film School Rejects

Hey Will Smith, Fuck you and the overpriced horse you rode in on.  Independence Day, the movie that is about as “Red, White and Blue” as you can get, is getting a sequel.  Thank the good lord! I thought for a minute that there would never be another movie where America saves the world from an alien invasion…….. All kidding aside, I loved Independence Day.  Nothing gives me a stars and stripes boner more than listening to Bill Pullman give his “Independence” speech out of the back of a pickup truck.  That’s all-star American hero stuff.  The hiccup in the production of the new one is that Will Smith is “too expensive” to get for the sequel.  Really Will? You’re gonna do us like that?  I think after having to suffer through your last few movies you would throw us a freakin’ bone here.  Reunite with Goldblum and save America again. Actually, on second though, I’m glad that he won’t be back, this gives Paxton a chance at saving the sequel from a possible flop at the box office. Listen up, Emmerich, this is how we transition.  Movie opens, Goldblum and Paxton find Will using and beating his wife…again.  Goldblum pulls out a .45 and blows his head off.  Kill off Will, problem solved.

God Dammit, i’m good.


P.S. I imagine this is the producers reaction when he got Will Smith’s price for the second movie.

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