Category Archives: Insane Instagram Comments
Insane Instagram Comments
We all know, the comment section on any website is a grotesque place. This is especially true for Instagram. The Average Nobodies’ Insane Instagram Comments highlights the most deranged comments Instagram has to offer. See some savage shit going down in the comment section? Hit us up on twitter or Instagram if you have any leads on a comment(s) that should be featured. Stay safe out there, internetters.
For those of you who don’t know, Olivia Culpo is Rhode Island native (hey now!), current model, actress, restaurateur and former 2012 miss USA winner. She’s also currently dating New England Patriot Danny Amendola, because beautiful people need to stick together. Olivia recently reached 2 million followers, and celebrated how anyone would: with a lot of balloons.
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THANK YOU TO THE TWO MILLION OF ALL OF YOU! I love getting to share so much with you, you make me smile every single day. Nothing makes me happier than interacting with you all whether it's through posts, pictures, comments, or even in person (when we're lucky 😉) Also thank you to my amazing team for ACTUALLY blowing up each of these 10000000 helium balloons. You guys make everything so much more fun ❤️❤️❤️❤️ @nikkibohannon @zoewrubs @carolinecarter8
Isn’t that lovely. Kind of sucks for her team because blowing up 10,000,000 balloons sounds awful. Beyond awful. While most of her fans were also in the celebratory mood, one creature from the depths of Instagram hell emerged to spoil the party:
I didn’t just include @me81093418470’s comment in that picture, but if you can’t distinguish the insane from the not insane we have bigger problems here. I’m always tempted to dissect these comments, but I know that’s a losing battle. I really can’t figure this one out though. “Look at me while you take your bra off” is insane on it’s own, but when you add all those extra exclamation points it enters into the danger zone. It’s so oddly specific too. The eye contact request is what really worries me, although if I’m being honest, this person existing on planet Earth is the most worrying thing of all.
Hey Olivia, if you’re reading, I apologize on behalf of the human race.
The best (or worst) thing about this is how casual it all seems. James Franco is advertising t-shirts with his name on it and then BAM, a ‘can I s your d’ comment just coming right out of left field. I don’t hate it, it was just unexpected, and it just seems like it was done so calmly. No exclamation point, no question mark, which means it was more of a statement than a question. This person wasn’t really asking, they were letting James Franco know what’s going to happen later whether he likes it or not. As a normal person, you don’t have people commenting on your pictures telling you that they’re going to suck your dick, so I don’t know how I’d feel about this. At first I’m sure it’s flattering, but after awhile I’m sure the people telling you that aren’t the kind of people you want near your dick.
Before I even looked at the comments for this picture, I knew something weird was going to happen. Maryse & Kelly Kelly are two of the hottest women on the planet. That is a fact that can not be denied. They’re both also former WWE Divas, which means they’ve crossed the dangerous threshold of being really hot and having a lot of wrestling fans. Combine that with the general insanity that is the Instagram comments section and you have yourself a recipe for success. Maybe not success, but it’s a recipe for something. While the first commenter goes the traditional route and just comments the letter ‘S’, @pappi91 immediately turns up the heat and gets right to the point. I think there’s a time and a place to make a comment like this. In this case, the time and place being ‘never’ and ‘never’. The best (or worst) part is that he’s pretty much having a conversation with himself. He’s not responding to another comment; he just saw a picture he liked and decided to tell the whole world his plans for the rest of the day. Unfortunately for us, his plans involved a dangerous amount of masturbation.
The Rock goes out of his way, more so than any other celebrity I can think of, to be nice and accommodating to his fans. He’s always mentioning his fans on Instagram or taking pictures with people who idolize him at the gym, but I think even The Rock would have a hard time answering @bae_unknown_. It seems like this Instagram commenter had more to say but decided to just end his thought mid sentence. This isn’t the most outrageous comment we’ve seen by a long shot, but it is kind of insane. If you’re going to take the time comment on someone’s Instagram, at least have it make a little sense. The Rock is such a genuine guy he’d probably take you out for steak and tequila if you could form a coherent sentence. Until then, keep asking questions without question marks.
Porn stars are probably the easiest targets on Instagram, since most of the people who follow them are bloodthirsty horn dogs. So even when they post a picture as innocent as a couple takeout containers full of burgers and fries, the comment section is locked and loaded with some depraved comments. The only silver lining here is that porn stars HAVE to hear and see some really disturbing comments, so this is probably a welcome request to Abella Anderson. In the grand scheme of things, getting asked to have someone eat fast food off your ass really isn’t that bad. If you’ve ever scrolled through the comments on PornHub videos or any porn stars Twitter/Instagram you’ll realize that this request is as normal as apple pie, which is probably another thing @gooodlivin would like to eat off of Abella’s ass. Just another day in the life of a porn star.