Category Archives: Average Blog Posts
Average Blog Posts
Blogs in this category (Average Blog Posts) have not been put into a category. This is where you can read a backlog of all Average Nobodies blogs.
Bloggers. Wrestling Enthusiasts. Beer drinkers. Movie Quoters. We have our cake and eat it too. Ryan Fogarty and Matt Vieira are The Average Nobodies.
Pope John Paul II On His Way To Sainthood Is A Direct Slap In The Face To Bill Paxton
VATICAN CITY (AP) — Pope John Paul II has cleared the final obstacle before being made a saint, awaiting just the final approval from Pope Francis and a date for the ceremony that could come as soon as Dec. 8, a Vatican official and news reports said Tuesday. The ANSA news agency reported that a commission of cardinals and bishops met Tuesday to consider John Paul’s case and signed off on it. A Vatican official confirmed that the decision had been taken some time back and that Tuesday’s meeting was essentially a formality. One possible canonization date is Dec. 8, the feast of the Immaculate Conception, a major feast day for the Catholic Church. This year the feast coincidentally falls on a Sunday, which is when canonizations usually occur. The official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because he is not authorized by the church to discuss saint-making cases on the record, confirmed reports in La Stampa newspaper that John Paul could be canonized together with Pope John XXIII, who called the Second Vatican Council but died in 1963 before it was finished. There is reasoned precedent for beatifying or canonizing two popes together, primarily to balance one another out. John Paul has been on the fast track for possible sainthood ever since his 2005 death, but there remains some concern that the process has been too quick. Some of the Holy See’s deep-seated problems — clerical sex abuse, dysfunctional governance and more recently the financial scandals at the Vatican bank — essentially date from shortcomings of his pontificate. Defenders of the fast-track process argue that people are canonized, not pontificates.
– Yahoo/AP
Vs.
Wow. There are slaps in the face and then there are SLAPS IN THE FACE. Why doesn’t the catholic church just go to Bill Paxton’s house and kick his dog. Go beat up his grandmother in a nursing home. I am shocked and appalled. In all seriousness what did Pope John Paul II really do? Every picture I’ve ever seen of him he’s sitting in a chair. Tough life. I wouldn’t mind sitting in a chair all day wearing beautiful robes and fancy hats, all the while being the moral authority for one of the largest religions in the modern world. Bill.Paxton, on the other hand, discovered the fucking Titantic. He chased down massive tornadoes with Helen Hunt. He went to the goddamn moon with Kevin Bacon and Tom Hanks. I don’t think I’ve ever been more upset about something in my life. If Bill Paxton isn’t canonized in my lifetime then I would have live an unfulfilled life. And it will be all Pope John Paul II’s fault.
– Ryan
P.S. No way the Pope can grow a beard like that. Paxton owns him again.
I Think It’s Time We Respect The Lonely Island
I really couldn’t think of anything to post today. I feel like Im hungover yet I didn’t even drink yesterday. Maybe it was that extra chili dog. Anyway, something needs to be said about a certain group that continually puts out hilarious videos and catchy songs. All aboard The Lonely Island bandwagon.
Flashback Friday: “Blood Sugar” Trailer
“Blood Sugar” Trailer from Matthew vieira on Vimeo.
A little Flashback Friday for ya. The trailer to our 2010 film Blood Sugar. To see the whole film click here.
-MattyV
The Last Movie I’ll Ever See
I just saw the trailer for the last movie ill ever see. It’s called Escape Plan starring 2 of the 3 greatest actors of all time. Stallone and Schwarzenegger the Jordan and Pippen of Hollywood. Sly plays some dude who breaks out of prisons for a living and guess what it’s a setup. He’s trapped in a hell of a prison and has to get out. He calls on good ol Arnold who makes it clear he means business, goatee and all. I’m beyond pumped for this movie. I may go stand in line tomorrow morning so I don’t miss it. Oh yea and 50 cent is in it too, so you know it’s good. Check out the trailer here.
+Berno
Life Lessons From Yoko Ono
It’s Friday. Let’s get yoked.
“@yokoono: I would like to see a sky vending machine on every corner of the street instead of the coke machine. We need more skies than coke.”
– Not a bad idea in theory. I’m just not quite sure what a sky vending machine would look like. And would it sell skies? How much does a sky cost? Is there more than one sky? Yoko has a lot of explaining to do.
“@yokoono: You can even assemble a painting with a person in the North Pole over a phone, like playing chess.”
– Yoko is really all over the place with this one. Personally I don’t know anyone who lives in the North Pole. Not exactly the most habitable place in the world. Just seems like a really inconvenient scenario. I’m assuming the North Pole has horrible cell phone service. What if you’re on a deadline? Not your best suggestion Yoko.
This week’s lessons: we need more sky vending machines, and if you’re attempting to paint a painting, make sure you get in touch with someone at the North Pole. Stay frosty and have a great weekend.
– Jim
Alec Baldwin Goes Nuclear on Twitter
George Stark your days are numbered. In a recent article posted by the aforementioned British reporter, he claims that Alec Baldwin’s wife was tweeting during James Gandolfini’s funeral. Alec Baldwin did not take kindly to these acquisitions, to say the least. Alec went on a little twitter rampage to vent his frustrations with Stark. Here are the tweets.
“…Hey thats not true, but i’m going to tweet at your funeral” Holy shit, that escalated quickly. George Stark, run for the hills. Because now not only do you have Alec Baldwin after you, but me as well. How dare you write an article about Tony Soprano’s funeral and not make him the center of attention. Instead you go to the petty story of the day, a few random tweets. You have my attention Mr. Stark, and not in a good way. Proofread your pieces 20 times over, because hell hath no fury, like my friends and I, when we find improper grammar online. Not to mention Billy Baldwin is probably coming after your ass. Your cooked.
-MattyV
P.S. There is a special place in hell for people who try to make a fool of Alec Baldwin.
The Worst Week In Boston Sports History
What is happening?! This has to go down in the history books as the worst week in Boston sports history. I’m going to call it “The Beantown Blackout “. SportsCenter, take notice!
And what do Boston fans have to show for all this heartache? Kris Humphries………..GREAT
-MattyV
Gerard Streator Really Likes Couches
“More cushion for the pushin’! A Wisconsin man who was caught last year having sex with a couch pleaded guilty to public lewdness Monday.Gerard Streator, 47, was sentenced to five months in jail for the furniture fornication, according to documents obtained by The Smoking Gun. He is also barred from possessing “pornography of any kind” and must pay $243 in court costs. Streator was arrested in September 2012, when an off-duty police officer jogging in Waukesha, Wisc. noticed Streator on the side of the road, taking the term “love seat” far too literally. The officer wrote that Streator was “thrusting his pelvic area against the cushions and trying to sexually gratify himself by rubbing his penis between the two cushions.” Since his arrest, a presumably fake Twitter account for Streator, @ProudGunNut, has sprung up. The account, which uses Streator’s mug shot as a profile picture and include the bio, “Silenced for supporting gun rights. Framed by the government for picking up a sofa when I wasn’t wearing a belt.” – HuffPost
When I read the headline for this article I was confused. Not because Gerard was having sex with his couch, but because the poor guy got arrested. What we do in the confines of our homes should be nobodys business but our own. Is having sex with a couch weird? Yes, yes it is. But if he’s not bothering anybody, I say let the guy bang as many couches as he wants. Then I continued reading, and now I’ll probably never have a good nights sleep again. Turns out Gerard was having sex with a random couch in public. How insane do you have to be to do something like that? Fucking couches is one thing, but walking around in public looking for couches to fuck on the side of the road is some bizarre shit. How upset must be his couch be at home. Probably getting fucked for years, sweet talked after every love making session. You know Gerard was dropping popcorn and pennies between the cushions to show the couch how much he loves it. Then Gerard goes and fucks some random couch on the side of the road? That’s some cold blooded shit Gerard. Get your act together and be a one couch loving man.
– Ryan
P.S. If you show me that picture and give me three guesses as to what Gerard did I’d guess couch fucker on the second try. Cross eyed like you wouldnt believe.
