Category Archives: Average Blog Posts
Average Blog Posts
Blogs in this category (Average Blog Posts) have not been put into a category. This is where you can read a backlog of all Average Nobodies blogs.
Bloggers. Wrestling Enthusiasts. Beer drinkers. Movie Quoters. We have our cake and eat it too. Ryan Fogarty and Matt Vieira are The Average Nobodies.
So Pablo Sandoval is Reg MacWorthy
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Spitting image. My question is how does Pablo do it. Including spring training and playoffs, a baseball season can run from early March to late October. Where does he find the time to star in Eastbound and Down. Not only that, but he was a series regular on The Office and starred in movies. Is Pablo Sandoval a super hero? No other explanation for how he can be so many places at once. I know deep down he must be dying to tell the world his story. When this comes out, it’s going to dominate headlines. America’s first baseball player/actor super hero. I can feel it in my plums.
– Ryan
The Royal Family is Rubbing Perfection in Our Faces
Smoke mom, soon-to-be king dad, newborn royalty, and their dog? Really? Come on guys, have some sympathy for us common folk.
-MattyV
PS- You think they could have found a better photographer. What’s with the washed out background? That’s amateur work.
What Happened to the Days When You Could Buy a Hooker With A Roll of Quarters
“A man in Greenwood, S.C., was arrested for buying a roll in the hay with a roll of quarters, police say
Larry Collum, 63, was arrested Wednesday evening after police pulled him over because he was driving his SUV very slowly down the street.
There was another reason: The cops noticed Rhonda Kelley, 41 — a known prostitute — was in the passenger seat, WNEM.com reported. At first, Collum told police that he was just giving Kelley a ride home, but later admitted having sex with her in exchange for the $10 roll of quarters. Police located the roll on Kelley, but she denied the romp, GWDToday.com reported. Collum was charged with solicitation of prostitution while Kelley was booked on prostitution charges. Collum was taken to the Greenwood County Detention Center, where he allegedly told officers he paid to have sex with the woman because his wife had been in a nursing home for 13 years. He added that he had made a serious error in judgment, according to the Greenwood Index Journal.” – HuffPost
Everyone needs to get off Larry’s back! This guy tears through his couch cushions, lifts every rug in the house, and reaches between the seats of his SUV to scrounge up enough change to buy himself a good time, and the police ruin the party? Typical police activity, just kicking a man while he’s down. This guy probably had the good sense to roll his own change instead of getting ripped off at a Coinstar machine, and this is how society repays him? Throwing him in the slammer, from catching some dome from a $10 hooker? It’s a disgrace, can’t a guy just live?
-MattyV
Bruce Jenner’s Face Is What I Imagine The Devil To Look Like
Bruce Jenner’s face is what nightmares are made of. Legitimately haunting. How do you go from being named the “World’s Best Athlete” and a Wheaties cover boy who had females swooning across the globe to “Fire Marshall Bill”, an F list celebrity and the husband of Kris Kardashian?
Fire Marshall Bill. Or Bruce Jenner. You be the judge.
Talk about a rise and fall. I’ve heard of collapses before, but this one takes the cake. Even if he screwed around with his face to the point of being almost unrecognizable, Bruce could at least pull the Olympic card and get a halfway decent girl. Instead he completes the greatest demise in the history of America by marrying pond scum in human form:
They’re like the couple from hell, if hell consisted of people who fuck with their face until they turn into plastic toys. I may be an out of shape 25 year old with a moderate to severe drinking problem, but I thank my lucky stars everyday that I’m not Bruce Jenner.
– Ryan
Prince Tweeted The Album Cover For His New Single And It’s Awesome
For those unaware, Prince officially joined Twitter a few weeks ago (@3rdeyegirl) and it basically turning the platform on it’s head. The guy legally changed his name to a symbol, so giving him 140 characters of free range is going to be fun to follow. Almost on cue, Prince tweeted out the following concerning his new single Breakfast Can Wait:
Game: Blouses http://t.co/3jShq2r9Ci http://t.co/3oEI8kQsKB http://t.co/G0uLp2mbJk pic.twitter.com/dNwDPifP8j
— PRINCE 3RDEYEGIRL (@3rdeyegirl) August 16, 2013
Dave Chappelle, dressed as Prince, serving pancakes. Straight out of a Charlie Murphy True Hollywood Story. It really doesn’t get much better than that. Now we can all go purify ourselves in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
– Ryan
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaKHR6oe52Q&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Happy Birthday Bobby De Niro
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rs-Rh8p8jPw&feature=youtube_gdata_player
One of the greatest at his craft turns 70 today. Happy birthday my sweet prince.
– Ryan
Is Ben Affleck A Red Sox Jinx?
Ben Affleck is undoubtedly the man. Oscar winning screenwriter and director. Handsome. Big time Red Sox fan. That’s the trifecta in my book. However, he does have one flaw: he was born on August 15th. Since his oscar winning film Good Will Hunting premiered in 1998, the Boston Red Sox are 0-14 on Affleck’s birthday. 14 losses in a row seems like more than just a coincidence to me. I propose one of two things: either Affleck changes his birthday to sometime in the off season or the Red Sox get a scheduled day off every August 15th. It’s hard enough beating professional athletes, they shouldn’t have to deal with this voodoo witchcraft as well.
– Ryan
P.S. What is with the Red Sox and curses. We finally win a few world series’ and now one of our biggest supporters is a curse? Heresy.
So Lady Gaga Has Been Wearing Clown Makeup All Week
“After Lady Gaga’s new song “Applause” was leaked, Gaga decided to take some action and stroll the streets of Los Angeles in the same makeup featured on the single’s cover art. While not too many people can get away with rainbow face paint (just look at poor Ryan Seacrest) on Lady Gaga, the make-up looks almost… normal. Where is the gigantic egg? Where is the dress made of meat?! Click on to see some of Gaga’s most, well, normal looks.” – Bustle
That’ll show ’em. Lesson here kids: when you wear clown makeup in public all week, we all lose.
– Ryan
P.S. It’s 2013. All that advertising and social media promoting is a major reason your a millionaire. If a song leaks, suck it up.
