Category Archives: Average Blog Posts
Average Blog Posts
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Bloggers. Wrestling Enthusiasts. Beer drinkers. Movie Quoters. We have our cake and eat it too. Ryan Fogarty and Matt Vieira are The Average Nobodies.
Martell Davis Makes Pimpin’ Look Easy
“Martell Davis faces sex trafficking charges. He makes catchin’ pimps look easy. Martell Davis, 34, was clad in a t-shirt that read “I make pimpin’ look easy” when he was arrested in late July and charged with sex trafficking, according to federal court filings published this week by The Smoking Gun. Davis’ arrest was the result of an undercover operation by San Diego vice cops. A detective responded to an online prostitution ad and set up an $80 “date” for July 26 at a Best Western hotel. According to the report, a 17-year-old girl was waiting and officers promptly arrested her for prostitution. They then confiscated her phone and used it to text Davis, who they believed was her pimp. Posing as the girl, an officer asked how much to charge for anal sex, and Davis allegedly responded, “Oh sh*t make him break the bank babe,” and suggested at least $200. They texted back and forth for a while, and Davis agreed to pick the teen up later that night. When he showed up, cops arrested him and charged him with sex trafficking of a minor. Cops say Davis told them he did not know the prostitute was a minor, claiming just “just helping [her] out” and that he acted as “protection” for her.” – Huff Post
Maybe not the brightest move. But Martell Davis needs to let the good people of San Diego how good he is at his job. In this case, that job happens to be illegal. Would we be ridiculing a librarian who walked around with a shirt that said “I Make Renting Books Look Easy”, or a firefighter with a shirt that said “I Make Spraying My Hose Look Easy”? I guess the latter suggestion is kind of inappropriate, but you get my point. Don’t hate Martell Davis, hate the pimp game for making it so damn easy for him.
– Ryan
SWEET SUGAR: The NFL and Google are About to Have a Love Child
In the least surprising news of the week, as DirecTV’s rights to the vaunted NFL Sunday Ticket package come close to their 2014 expiration date, rumors of who else may bid for them are starting and Google is right at the top. According toAllThingsD, league officials met with the internet giant today and among many topics, the package of rights to air all of the league’s games to out of market viewers came up. As suggested, the folks in Mountain View (and several other companies we can all think of) can certainly afford the reported $1 billion DirecTV has been paying — and YouTube has already shelled out to stream sports in the USand around the world — but whether or not the NFL would actually sell to them is still in question. -Engadget
From what I am reading on the matter, this is a bit of a long shot. It seems that the NFL will again renew its contract with the satellite company DirectTV in 2014. But imagine, just imagine, what watching the NFL would be like under Google’s control? I’m talking streaming from YouTube, tablets, smartphones, and any other device that can get its grubby little antenna on the internet. This would be a total game changer for the NFL and America. More people around the US would see the games they wanted to see, and for me that means watching my Bucs from RI! Like I said, don’t get your hopes up, because they are probably renewing with DirectTV, but you never know, Google has surprised us before.
-MattyV
Have No Fear Celtics Fans: Walter McCarty Is Your New Assistant Coach
“Walter McCarty, who spent nearly eight seasons with the Boston Celtics during a 10-year playing career, confirmed to ESPN.com’s Jeff Goodman on Tuesday that he will be an assistant coach on Brad Stevens’ staff. The 39-year-old McCarty landed in Boston in October 1997 after being traded by the Knicks before his sophomore season. He emerged a fan favorite here and “I love Walter!” became a familiar catchphrase for television broadcaster Tommy Heinsohn. McCarty helped Boston to three playoff appearances from 2002-04 before being traded to Phoenix for a second-round pick midway through the 2004-05 season. James Posey, another beloved former Celtic, and McCarty were believed to be the two top candidates to round out Stevens’ staff as it appeared he was seeking a former player. Comcast SportsNet first reported McCarty’s hiring. McCarty joins the staff of the 36-year-old Stevens, who had previously brought on Ron Adams, a longtime NBA assistant, and Micah Shrewsberry, one of Stevens’ former assistants at Butler. Assistants Jay Larranaga and Jamie Young were carried over from Doc Rivers’ staff. Boston ties have served McCarty well as he immersed himself in coaching. He served as an assistant under former Celtics coach Rick Pitino at the University of Louisville in 2007. McCarty moved on to be an NBA assistant under former Celtics coach Jim O’Brien in Indiana during the 2010-11 season, but was let go a season later when the Pacers hired Frank Vogel. McCarty has been a familiar presence in Boston, often sitting courtside during games the past two seasons.” – ESPN
Perfect. Rebuilding a historic franchise? Bring in mediocre fan favorite players from the past to get the fans behind you again. I’m completely judging a book by it’s cover here, but McCarty doesn’t look like he’d be a good coach. He seems like the kind of guy who would goof around at practice then try and out drink the whole team at bars on the weekends. Maybe I’m right, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe McCarty is the next John Wooden. All I know is the Celtics better have an oxygen tank at the announcers table for every home game because Tommy Heinsohn is going to lose his shit with Walter now on the coaching staff.
– Ryan
Am I Missing Out On The Latest Fashion Trend?
Why put it in your pockets when you can put it in a bag? That’s the question more and more American men seem to be asking as the man bag — or “murse” — industry booms. Sales of men’s handbags and totes rose 3% to $957 million in the 12 months through June, while briefcases, duffel, laptop, and messenger bags declined, according to NPD Group, a market research firm. Backpacks also experienced a surge, growing 24% to $684 million in revenue during the period. “Men have been silently learning just how important it is to have a bag to carry their ‘stuff,’” such as electronics, chargers, headphones, and books, Marshal Cohen, NPD’s chief industry analyst, wrote in a post on the firm’s blog today. “And just think about the practical side of this. Men’s clothing has gotten tighter again. Now where do men put those keys or phone? With this change in fashion and lifestyle, men now do need to carry a bag.” – BuzzFeed
Does this mean I need a murse? American men spending almost $1 Billion on a fashion item can’t be wrong. On the one hand, I don’t necessarily want to look like the guy in the black vest. He’s probably a sweet guy, but I don’t know if that look gives off the “I’m a 25 year old male looking for a female” vibe I’m going for. On the other hand, the guy who might be Jamie Lannister looks so badass it’s unreal. Plus, I hate when I have my keys in my jean pockets, and cell phones are getting so big it’s a hassle to try and cram them in there. A murse might be the only way to go. If I become a murse guy, I definitely have to double down my scarf collection. A murse without a scarf is a fashion no-no.
– Ryan
P.S. I’d bet anything the bearded guy paid for his murse with a credit card. A Lannister always pays his debts.
I’m Gonna Need These Picnic Pants ASAP
Are you shitting me? This is pure brilliance. No more towels. No more stupid blankets. Granted I don’t go on many picnics, but if you’re only using these pants on picnics you’re wasting it’s potential. Going to the movies? Let me put on my picnic pants and go to town on some popcorn. Spontaneous snack time? Picnic pants turning friends into jealous zealots. I need these.picnic pants and I will have these picnic pants. End of story.
– Ryan
A-Rod and Animal Abusers Move Over, I have an Undying Hate For Someone Else
OKLAHOMA CITY — An Australian man attending an Oklahoma college on a baseball scholarship was shot and killed in what police described Monday as a random act of violence by three “bored” teenagers who decided to kill someone for the fun of it.
Christopher Lane, 22, of Melbourne, was found dead Friday while visiting the town of Duncan, where his girlfriend and her family live. Three boys, ages 15, 16, and 17, are in custody and face a court appearance Tuesday afternoon.
Duncan Police Chief Danny Ford said Monday a woman called 911 after she saw Lane stagger across the road and fall to the ground in the south-central Oklahoma town of about 24,000 residents. Ford said Lane, who was staying with his girlfriend and her family in Duncan, had jogged past a home where the three boys were staying. He said the shooting appeared to be completely random.
Autopsy results are pending. Ford wouldn’t say how many times Lane was shot.
Ford said the 17-year-old has given a detailed confession to police but that investigators have not been able to locate the weapon.
“They saw Christopher go by, and one of them said: ‘There’s our target,'” Ford said. “The boy who has talked to us said: ‘We were bored and didn’t have anything to do, so we decided to kill somebody.'”
“They followed him in the car to that area, shot him in the back and drove off,” Ford said.
Ford told the television station KOCO in Oklahoma City that one of the teens said they shot Lane for “the fun of it.”
He said the district attorney is expected to file first-degree murder charges Tuesday, and all three will be arraigned at Stephens County District Court. It wasn’t known whether the three will be charged as adults or as juveniles. -ESPN
Thank god for Oklahoma having capital punishment. When i’m bored I take out a video game, I whip out the old sketch book, or hell, I’ll even visit the spank bank. Want to know what I don’t do? Go out and kill innocent people, but maybe it was just how I was raised. When I was young my dad (Happy Birthday old man!) always told me that I shouldn’t have my elbows on the table while i’m eating and that I should never go out and shoot people when i’m bored. Those two things go together like lamb and tuna fish. Chis Lane, a 22 year-old college student had his life cut short after these 3 morons (I will refrain from the words I would normally use because I have fucking taste) went out and killed him, because they “didn’t have anything to do”. Hey guys, I don’t have anything to do tomorrow after work, mind if I come by and take your head off with a baseball bat? It’s a damn shame that people like this exist.
R.I.P Chris.
-MattyV
PS- I am not one to glorify killers (i’m not the rolling stone), but these kids <sarcasm> are doing wonders for stereotypes. </sarcasm>
People That are 1,000x More Talented Than Me #432 : Helicopter Pilots
Check out this firefighter just owning that cockpit. Swooping into some guys backyard, stealing his pool water, and dumping that shit all over a nearby forest fire. Every woman in the area, with their eyes on the sky, just had their ovaries blown to smithereens. Operating heavy machinery has to be the biggest turn-on for a woman… HAS TO.
-MattyV
PS- If you call a helicopter a helo, and you’re not in the military, stop.
Shannon Brown Is Having A Great Off Season
Nothing worse than hyping up a crowd by promising to dunk over three people then falling on your ass and trampling over the volunteers. Even if he pulls this off, is it that impressive? The people are laying down. Your a 6’4 professional basketball player. If you’re not jumping over a flaming table or the world’s tallest man I’m not interested.
– Ryan
