Category Archives: Average Blog Posts
Average Blog Posts
Blogs in this category (Average Blog Posts) have not been put into a category. This is where you can read a backlog of all Average Nobodies blogs.
Bloggers. Wrestling Enthusiasts. Beer drinkers. Movie Quoters. We have our cake and eat it too. Ryan Fogarty and Matt Vieira are The Average Nobodies.
Edna Mackey and Her Workouts Are Taking the World By Storm, But I Gotta Say I’m Not Impressed
I don’t want to sound like an asshole but is this really that impressive? I understand she’s 100 but you have to remember what kind of world we live in. I watched a guy jump out of a spaceship and parachute back into the atmosphere the other day on YouTube. It’s kind of hard to be blown away by an old woman stepping side to side after you’ve seen that. With that said, those three videos combined are more than I’ve worked out for all of 2014. Not sure who says that more about, me or Edna Mackey.
– Ryan
The WWE Needs to Get Their Heads Out of Their Asses and Add a 4th Wyatt Family Member
Bray, Luke and Erik, meet Ben Wyatt, the original Wyatt family member. Parks and Rec/ WWE Monday Night Raw crossover?? Why not? Ben Wyatt is a nerdy accountant, which is the perfect cover for a bearded wrestling psychopath. He could be the “Spike Dudley” of the Wyatt Family: the runt of the litter type character that gets the shit beat out of him but becomes lovable in the process. It’s a shame Mike Awesome is dead, because Ben Wyatt vs. Mike Awesome could have been one hell of a feud. Somebody get Adam Scott on the phone and run this idea by him. Kind of an integral part of my plan.
– Ryan
“Google Now” for Chrome: Get it HERE
Follow these steps:
1. Open Chrome
2. In the address bar type: chrome://flags/#enable-google-now
3. Change the drop down to “enabled”
4.When it’s complete you will see a square in the lower right of your screen
Louis C.K’s SNL Promo’s Are Here and We’re That Much Closer to Saturday Night!
Run of the mill SNL promo’s but I don’t care. I can’t wait for Saturday night and for Louis C.K. to tear the house down yet again. We also learned that Sam Smith will be his musical guest. According to Wikipedia, Sam Smith is an old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era. Should be fantastic. Make sure to follow us on Twitter @averagenobodies as we’ll be tweeting witty observations during the show.
– Ryan
P.S. LINCOLN
Melissa North Leads the Weirdest/Saddest Life I’ve Ever Heard Of
Source – A 22-year-old student who is so terrified of cheese she is unable to walk past the supermarket counter in case she bursts into tears has spoken of how her phobia blights her everyday life.
Melissa North, from Herne Bay, Kent, said she developed the phobia at the age of four, but she is now so terrified of the dairy product the mere sight of it can bring her out in a cold sweat.
The illustration and visual communications student said family and friends tease her for the fear, which has seen her stay away from the food ever since she was given it at a friend’s house when she was a child.
She said: ‘Walking past a deli counter in a supermarket is really difficult for me. I get so clammy and start to have a panic attack.
‘It just looks awful – so gooey and disgusting – it makes me feel sick.
‘My friends and family think it’s hilarious but it’s really awful. I hate going near the stuff, and seeing people eat it is horrendous.
‘Touching or eating cheese for me is like someone who is scared of spiders holding a tarantula. It’s terrifying.’
Ms North said she has stayed away from the dairy product ever since she was given cheese on toast at a friend’s house when she was a child.
She said: ‘It tasted horrible but my parents had always taught me to finish what was on my plate – I didn’t want to be rude so I had no choice but to eat it.
I tried to follow along with this article but I just don’t understand. Melissa North is not allergic to cheese. She doesn’t have a medical condition that prohibits her from eating cheese. Her grandfather didn’t die in a tragic cheese accident. She’s just deathly afraid of it. Friends and family are teasing her for being deathly afraid of cheese? Well I’d hope they are, because this is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard of. I can’t trust someone who has never felt the warm embrace of melted pepper jack cheese on a hamburger, or the sweet nectar of mozzarella cheese on top of a piece of chicken parmigiana. If you don’t like cheese, you’re weird, but I understand it. If you’re deathly afraid of cheese, you’re insane.
– Ryan
Monster Blog Wednesday: Exotic Pets
Monster Blog Wednesday is back in full swing. This week? Well, this week we offer up our choices for exotic pets. Simple right? NOPE. Here’s the kicker: We are counting extinct animals in our selections. Got yours? No? That’s ok, take a look at our picks for inspiration.
Wooly Mammouth
Large, Majestic, and hairy, The Wooly Mammoth is my perfect spirit animal and pet! I really have no idea what these guys were like but I bet they were loyal as hell. Loyalty is one of the main personality traits i look for in a beast-friend. Secondly, this guy is is instant transportation. I will immediately be selling my car after this guy comes to live with me. Yeah, I might be late for everything I ever go to, but are you going to really hold it against me when I show up on a Wooly?
-Matt
PS- His name is Pete. Human names are hilarious for animals.
Rhinoceros
I’ve always had a fascination with Rhinos for no apparent reason, so that’s as good a reason as any to pick it as my exotic pet. I also feel like Rhinoceros are discriminated against in pop culture. Would it kill Disney to create a sassy Rhinoceros character? The ultimate slap in the face came during the movie Madagascar; you picked a zebra over a rhino, Disney? Are you high? I’m hoping through my fictional adoption that the perception of Rhinos will go from “oh God I’m going to die” to “man that Rhino is sassy!”.
-Ryan
Someone Please Put Kevin Love Under Suicide Watch
It’s alright big guy I have a solution for ya. Dump that sad excuse for a team and come on over to Boston. The Celtics, and Boston, would welcome you with open arms. We can give you the medicine you need…a title shot.
-Matt
PS- Minnesota can have Humphries. Nobody likes Humphries.
