Category Archives: Average Blog Posts
Average Blog Posts
Blogs in this category (Average Blog Posts) have not been put into a category. This is where you can read a backlog of all Average Nobodies blogs.
Bloggers. Wrestling Enthusiasts. Beer drinkers. Movie Quoters. We have our cake and eat it too. Ryan Fogarty and Matt Vieira are The Average Nobodies.
Jimmy Fallon Battles Emma Stone
For the people wondering what Jimmy brings to the table that Jay Leno didn’t already have, here is your answer. Don’t get me wrong, I like Leno (His car collection makes me 1,000,000% jealous), but he was for a different generation. Jimmy Fallon is the late night host this generation, and past generations, needs and deserves.
-Matt
PS- I know why Jimmy Fallon does this recurring segment, because no one is better than him. Although Emma might be his best competition yet.
Sam Simon Isn’t Letting a Little Terminal Cancer Get in His Way
“The day I was diagnosed I made a promise to myself that I would not spend the rest of my life in bed watching television — which is bizarre because it’s my favorite thing to do.”
Sam Simon, co-creator of The Simpsons, is riddled with cancer, can barely walk, and has been given 3-6 months to live, but that hasn’t slowed him down one bit. Simon has always been a humanitarian, giving to countless food banks that help feed the less fortunate. He is also a advocate of PETA and has left a large sum of his fortune to animal shelters. He is doing all of this while 6 different kinds of cancer destroy his body. In the speech I embedded above, Sam gave two words of advice to people over 40 — one was to get a colonoscopy, and the other was to tell someone that you love them. While the first thing is probably only necessary for the over 40 crowd, I think that people of any age should tell someone that you love them. That is a universal truth. Making every second count is the most important thing anyone can do in their lives. Sam Simon isn’t wasting anytime, even with death staring him in the face. We could all learn from him.
-Matt
PS- Sam Simon is everything our “Badass of the Week” is about.
Mickey Easterling’s Memorial Service Sounds Like It Was a Real Hoot
Source – Friends and family of Mickey Easterling are saying their final farewells to the well-known New Orleanian.
The philanthropist, socialite and proud Louisiana native passed away last week at the age of 83.
More than a thousand people attended her larger than life memorial service, with Mickey just as she wanted to be remembered… causally sitting on an iron bench, wearing a magnificent hat with a glass of champagne in one hand and a cigarette holder in the other.
“She`s in a Leonardo outfit,” says Sammy Steele who did Mickey’s hair and make-up. “And I actually dressed her tonight for the occasion.”
It`s no secret Mickey loved to be the center of attention.
But she always turned that attention into helping people in need.
“She touched so many different people. She made such a contribution in our city, to arts and the community,” says Steele.
“Mickey is known for throwing some of the most memorable New Orleans party`s.
“One specific one I remember was the one she gave for Lena Horne.
“It’s like something out a department store window in New York. On 5th Ave.,” says Steele referring to how Mickey’s memorial service was planned by her ahead of time, “This is what she requested. She`s sitting in a garden scenery to depict her back yard. This is what she wanted. No stone was left unturned for this memorial.”
“She looks wonderful,” says one bystander. “She looks just like Mickey.”
Mickey is a Graduate of Mt. Carmel Academy.
Well this is horrifying. Nothing like going to a memorial service for someone and having their corpse on display in full decorative garb. I’ve never been to New Orleans but for some reason this doesn’t sound out of the ordinary for people down there. If a thousand people showed up for this memorial service and had a party then it leads me to believe that this is a normal occurence in New Orleans. Maybe it’s just a Northeast thing but I’d feel uneasy being in the same room as the corpse of the person I was there to memorialize. I will admit that Mickey had one hell of an oufit on though. That pink boa is gasoline injected fire. Now I can add a corpse to the list of things that are better dressed than me. Happy Monday indeed.
– Ryan
America’s Long National Nightmare is Over: George Timothy Clooney is (Reportedly) Engaged
Batman – George Clooney told Esquire in September he had no “aspirations” to be married with children. That was a month before he was seen with Amal Alamuddin in October.
Could Clooney finally have met his match in Alamuddin, a 36-year-old Oxford-educated British lawyer who reportedly shares the actor’s passion for crusading for international human rights?
There is plenty of speculation that Alamuddin may be the woman who converts Clooney — with two Oscars and a firm hold near the top of Hollywood’s A-list — from confirmed bachelor to family man.
– Ryan
*whatever the opposite of a best friend is.
It is Our Distinct Pleasure to Welcome Donald Sterling to the Racist Hall of Fame Class 2014
Sterlings comments about not wanting his girlfriend to bring black people to his games are what lands him on the top of our hall of fame class. Donald Sterling really knows the right words to say, especially since he owns a NBA team. It’s over, Donald, time to sell the team. Don’t expect him to sell the team to someone that isn’t caucasian, Donny don’t roll like that.
Former inductees include:
John Rocker
You thought we’d forget you, didn’t you John? No racist hall of fame ceremony, especially a sports racist hall of fame ceremony, is complete without John Rocker. Back when the Mets didn’t suck, they had a pretty awesome rivalry with their NL East foe the Atlanta Braves. During the midst of this rivalry, Braves pitcher John Rocker did an interview with Sports Illustrated. Rocker was asked his views on New York and the people who inhabit the state, and naturally his answer was unimaginably horrible:
- On ever playing for a New York team: “I would retire first. It’s the most hectic, nerve-racking city. Imagine having to take the [Number] 7 train to the ballpark, looking like you’re [riding through] Beirut next to some kid with purple hair next to some queer with AIDS right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time right next to some 20-year-old mom with four kids. It’s depressing.”
- On New York City itself: “The biggest thing I don’t like about New York are the foreigners. I’m not a very big fan of foreigners. You can walk an entire block in Times Square and not hear anybody speaking English. Asians and Koreans and Vietnamese and Indians and Russians and Spanish people and everything up there. How the hell did they get in this country?”
As you can imagine, this didn’t go over well in New York or any other civilized place in the world. Rocker never backtracked any of his words and just turned into a shitty pitcher who hated everyone but white Americans. You’ve joined an elite class, Mr. Sterling.
Cliven Bundy
After this racist rant Bundy went on to blame Martin Luther King Jr. for his racism. Hey Cliven, you are already in the Hall of Fame, don’t show off.
There you have it, the worst of the worst and our first official selections into the racist hall of fame. It is really shocking that these types of people exist. Scum to the highest of degrees.
-The Average Nobodies
Honorary member:
Clayton Bigsby
Smurf It Up! – Motivation of the Day
The always inspiring, Gary V shoots a little motivation into your monday morning.
Let John Mayer Serenade You With His Live Acoustic Cover of Beyonce’s ‘XO’
John Mayer popping up from Australia to remind you that he still rules the world. I honestly think I could listen to him play anything on an acoustic guitar, and it doesnt even have to be music. If he came to my house one day and told me my dog got hit by a car while playing the guitar I think I’d be alright. Obviously I’d still be devastated and it’s probably a horrible example but that’s the power of John Mayer. Just making people forget about their handicapped dogs.
– Ryan
Jadeveon Clowney’s Draft Promo Video
Ok, so this video has me convinced that there is no length of head start I could have on Clowney that would make me safe from him catching up to me and tearing me to shreds. He almost flips those heavy bags each time he swings at them. Although, punching inanimate objects doesn’t completely convince me that he is ready for the NFL.
-Matt
